Sermons on Funny:

The Horse Leech

Contributed by Maurice Mccarthy on Nov 5, 2003

A leech is a blood sucker. A disgusting parasite that attempts to suck the life out of you. For the bible tells us, "life is in the blood." The two main methods of removing leeches are fire and salt. The spiritual parallel to removing spiritual leeches is

The Horse Leech Proverbs 30:15 The horseleach hath two daughters, crying, Give, give.. This is a message about spiritual leeches that attempt to suck the spiritual life out of you. Illus: Administratium The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered. The element, tentatively named ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 30:15

Denomination: Pentecostal

What Wealth Looks Like Series

Contributed by Guy Mcgraw on May 7, 2002

Paul’s Description of True Riches

· This morning we considered the first of Paul’s request in Ephesians 3:14-21 1) Intense prayer seen in his posture 2) Based upon the fact of our relationship with God as His children 3) Packed with potential due to the nature of the one prayed to: RICHES of His glory. Paul prays #1 for STRENGTH. ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 3:17-21

Giving Opens Doors

Contributed by Wade Martin Hughes, Sr on May 7, 2002

A liberal soul loves to give, giving touches God.

GIVING OPENS DOORS By Wade Martin Hughes, Sr. Kyfingers@aol.com TEXT: 2 Cor. 9:7 Every man according as he has purposed in his heart so let him give, NOT GRUDGINGLY, not of necessity, for GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL GIVER. 1 John 3:15 Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer; and ye ...read more

Scripture: Luke 6:38, 1 John 3:15

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Widow Series

Contributed by Michael Treston on May 8, 2002

A new look at what it means to give up everything to follow God

Economics What makes you uncomfortable to talk about? Money is essential our society does not function with out it. When we set up our priorities, When we look at our timetables we do so with an under lying belief, a hidden voice at the heart of us speaks which shapes and influences how we ...read more

Scripture: Luke 21:1-4

Denomination: Episcopal/Anglican

The Waiting Room Series

Contributed by Dan Cale on Aug 30, 2004

This is the fourth in a series of sermons that look at the life of Joseph and how dreams come true. This message deals with the problems and posibilities of waiting for God.

Joseph¡¦s Journey How Dreams Come True Pt 4 ¡V The Waiting Room This morning though I want to talk to you about the most dreaded place in American society ¡V The Waiting Room. You know when you walk in that your in trouble ¡V anyplace you go for an appointment where there are couches, magazines, ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 41:1-14

Denomination: *other

The Lost Coin - The Priority Of Evangelism Series

Contributed by Christopher Nerreau on Aug 15, 2009

God is infinitely concerned about each and every lost soul and so should we be. In our passage today, Jesus (addressing sinner’s see v.1) is going to reveal the heart of God toward lost sinners: 1. THE SUFFERING HEART OF GOD (v.8a) 2. THE SEARCHING HEAR

“THE LOST COIN” “The Priority of Evangelism” Luke 15:8-10 Fr. Christopher M. Nerreau One of the lessons I will never forget from my day’s as a Protestant is a passion for Evangelism. Evangelism is not a suggestion but a command. • Matthew 28:19 - “Go therefore and make disciples of all the ...read more

Scripture: Luke 15:8-10

Denomination: Orthodox

Thank You God!

Contributed by Thomas Bowen on Mar 3, 2009

Sermon about stewardship/giving

Thank You God! You have already heard form Jimmy and Cheryl thins morning I n a strange way, I feel just a little like I think President Obama probably feels… Most people have already made up their minds on the subject. Some are in full agreement and others already hate anything I might say on the ...read more

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 9:6-15

Denomination: Congregational

Is Jesus Really The Prince Of Peace?

Contributed by Daniel Habben on Aug 23, 2010

While Jesus came to bring peace between God and sinners he wants us to know that our life in this world as his followers won't be peaceful.

A couple of years ago a number of Circuit City electronic stores in the States were going out of business and some of them hired a liquidator to sell off their remaining inventory. Customers lined up to purchase TVs that were supposedly discounted by as much as 75%. Some savvy shoppers, however, ...read more

Scripture: Luke 12:49-53

Denomination: Lutheran

Money Myths: It's My Money Series

Contributed by Charles Whitmire on Jan 18, 2009

This message looks at the fact that God wants to do more with our money than ever imagined. ...but it’s not ours - its His!

What do you think says to the world that you are a follower of Christ? What tells people that you are a believer? Is it your Bible? Is it the way you dress, is it a bumper sticker, or a cross around your neck or the way you talk or the way you act? In his letter to the Corinthian Church, Paul ...read more

Scripture: Deuteronomy 8:6-18

Denomination: Baptist

"The Donkey Who Thought He Was A Horse"

Contributed by Ken Sauer on Mar 24, 2010

In Luke, when Jesus rides into Jerusalem on the back of a donkey, the crowds cheer Him--though they have no idea what the next few days will bring. Tne King has come to pay a ransom: the ransom for human sin. So, let us cheer His triumphal entry, but be a

Luke 19:28-40 Luke 23:1-49 “The Donkey who Thought He was a Horse” By: Ken Sauer, Pastor of East Ridge United Methodist Church, Chattanooga, TN There is nothing dignified about a donkey! We can look at him from any angle and we will fail to find what we might call a sense of ...read more

Denomination: United Methodist

Is God Fair?

Contributed by Dustin T Parker on Jan 31, 2010

In light of the trauma in the world (and especially in our church) how can we call God fair? Or is that not the right question?

Concordia Lutheran Church January 31, 2010 Is God Fair? Matthew 20:1-16 † IN THE NAME OF JESUS, THE MESSIAH † May the gifts and the peace of God our Father, and our Master, Jesus Christ be poured into your lives, as you work in His Kingdom! Parabolic Treatment of Parables! I have had a hard ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 20:1-16

Denomination: Lutheran

Soul-Lift

Contributed by Skip Alexander on Jun 30, 2008

Inward vs. outward change. We live in a world of face lifts when we need a soul-lift.

I. You Know You’re Getting Old When… • You and your teeth don’t sleep together. • You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren’t wearing any. • At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you’re not eating cereal. • You are on a first name basis with your ...read more

Scripture: 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Denomination: Baptist

It Only Works When You Know Where You're Going

Contributed by Brian Matherlee on Jul 23, 2008

Graduation message

IT ONLY WORKS WHEN YOU KNOW WHERE YOU’RE GOING Sunday, June 8, 2008 Pastor Brian Matherlee A doctor was traveling to find a patient in a small town who comes to a split in the road on a back country lane. The road sign at the fork points both directions for the same town. Seeing a farmer ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 11:8-10

Denomination: Wesleyan

God Sticks To His Plans! Series

Contributed by Paul Clemente on Nov 5, 2008

God will respond to people’s concerns but will always stick to His perfect plan!

In the Book of Isaiah Chapter 14, we can read God’s plans for Israel. Verse 24 of Isaiah 14 states, The LORD Almighty has sworn, "Surely, as I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will stand.” God told the prophet Jeremiah, “For I know the plans I have for you, plans to ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 17:15-27

Denomination: Independent/Bible

The Accused People Series

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Apr 11, 2008

Like a prosecuting attorney, God levels accusations against the nation of Israel.

The Accused People (Malachi 2:1-17) 1. It gives us great satisfaction when someone gets caught cheating. Bonnie Jones shares this story: "I was in the express lane at the store quietly fuming. Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the checkout line pushing a cart ...read more

Scripture: Malachi 2:1-17

Denomination: Independent/Bible