Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

God's Promises Are No Laughing Matter Series

Contributed by Mark Schaeufele on Nov 10, 2005

God takes his promises seriously and expects us to do the same.

GOD’S PROMISES ARE NO LAUGHING MATTER Text: Gen. 18:1-15; Gen. 21:1-7 Introduction 1. Read Gen. 18:1-15 2. God has a sense of humor.  He made me  My dog thinks she’s a cat 3. Except for when it comes to his promises. Thesis: God takes his promises seriously and expects us to ...read more

Denomination: Methodist

Knock, Knock!

Contributed by Johnny Knight on Jan 26, 2010

The “knock, knock” is the knocking the Holy Spirit does on our heart’s door.

KNOCK KNOCK Text: Revelation 3:20 “Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.” Knock Knock, who’s there? Atch. Atch, who? Gezunheit! Knock Knock, who’s there? Boo. Boo, who? Why are you ...read more

Scripture: Revelation 3:20

Denomination: Assembly Of God

John The Baptist Series

Contributed by Rev. Dr. Andrew B Natarajan on Mar 3, 2019

John the Baptist lived an exemplary life with clear conscience of his call and commitment. He had one conviction and gave his life for that.

Theme: Value Based Leaders - John the Baptist Text: Matthew 14:1-12 Joke: Three boys were discussing about their father’s profession. The firs boy said, ‘my dad scribbles a few words on piece of paper, he calls it poem, they give him Rs.1000/. The second boy says ‘my dad scribbles a few words on a ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 14:1-12

Denomination: Methodist

Testimonies Lead To Evangelism Series

Contributed by Paul Clemente on Jun 9, 2014

Our lives should lead to evangelism; responding to people's inquiry of our faith.

Please open your Bibles to Titus chapter 2….. Take a quick look at v15 of Titus 2…… And so, God teaches and we are to learn. As we learn from God, we can encourage and rebuke with all authority. And as we noted last week, God’s desire is for every person to know the truth. We are to share the ...read more

Scripture: Titus 2:7-15

Denomination: Independent/Bible

Easter Wisdom - April 1st

Contributed by Geoffrey Foot on Apr 2, 2018

Easter Day and April 1st doesn't coincide very often but it has a valuable lesson for us in that God's wisdom in raising Jesus from the dead corrects forever the foolishness of mankind.

EASTER Wisdom - April 1st!? 'Who says God doesn't have a sense of humour!' Twitter erupts with hilarious posts about the fact that Easter Day falls on the same day as April Fool's day - while Ash Wednesday is on Valentine's Day. But we all like a joke, a laugh - life would be very boring if we ...read more

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 1:23-25, 1 Peter 1:3-13

How To Participate In The Resurrection Series

Contributed by W Pat Cunningham on Apr 1, 2013

The witness of the apostles to the Resurrection challenges us to face the mystery of our own existence and life, and adopt a way of life that would inspire others at our own funerals.

Monday of Easter Week Gaudium et Spes Fifty-one days. What a difference fifty-one days can make, if Jesus Christ and the Spirit of Jesus Christ permeates those days. Look at the followers of Jesus in the wake of His arrest, torture and execution. They were cowering in a little upper room in ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 28:8-15

Denomination: Catholic

Where Is The Fire?

Contributed by Wilson Oshorakpor on Jun 5, 2023

Fire refines, burns and consumes. The word of God is fire. The prophets of old had fire in their bones. Today, lukewarmness pervades the church. Where is the fire?

TEXT: JEREMIAH 20:8-9 "When I speak, the words burst out. 'Violence and destruction!' I shout. So these messages from the LORD have made me a household joke. But if I say I’ll never mention the LORD or speak in his name, his word burns in my heart like a fire. It’s like a fire in my ...read more

Scripture: Jeremiah 20:8-9, Jeremiah 23:29

Denomination: Pentecostal

The Disciplines Of A Disciple Of Christ Series

Contributed by David Richardson on Feb 28, 2007

Let us therefore throw off all that hinders and run the course set out for us...

Title: The Disciplines of a Disciple of Christ, part I Robert Baxter, an English Puritan church leader during the 1600’s, had this say: "It is a most lamentable [regrettable] thing to see how most people spend their time and their energy for trifles [unimportant things], while God is cast aside. ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 12:1-6

Denomination: Calvary Chapel

God’s Timing Is Always Best

Contributed by Douglas Phillips on Apr 10, 2018

GOD HAS A PERFECT TIME FOR EVERYTHING ACCORDING TO HIS PLAN. THE WEDDING IN CANA IS AN EXAMPLE OF HOW JESUS USED A BAD CIRCUMSTANCE TO SHOW HOW GOD CARES FOR HIS PEOPLE.

GOD’S TIMING IS ALWAYS BEST JOHN 2:1-12 TODAY WE ARE COMPLETING A SERIES LOOKING AT SOME OF THE EARLY EVENTS AND STATEMENTS OF JESUS’ MINISTRY. THIS MORNING WE WILL LOOK AT THE FIRST RECORDED “SIGN” OF JESUS’ POWER WHEN HE TURNED THE WATER INTO WINE AT A MARRIAGE IN CANA OF GALILEE. WEDDINGS ...read more

Scripture: John 2:1-12

Denomination: Baptist

Stand And Hold!

Contributed by Jimmy Haile on Oct 28, 2012

We should stand on what we believe! We should stand on what we confess! We should stand on who we are, and what we are! We should stand on God’s promises!

1 Cor. 15:1-2-Moreover, brethren, I declare to you the gospel which I preached to you, which also you received and in which you stand, by which also you are saved, if you hold fast that word which I preached to you—unless you believed in vain. Gospel-The Good News….The death, burial ...read more

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 15:1-2

Denomination: Baptist

The Spirit Of Purity Laws Series

Contributed by I. Grant Spong on Oct 20, 2021

Is there any spiritual application of purity laws from the old covenant? Let's examine spiritual purity.

Purity laws included not eating unclean animals (Leviticus 11), not eating or touching dead animals (Leviticus 11:29-31), quarantining mothers after childbirth and menstruating women (Leviticus 12:2; 15:19-24), and men with an abnormal discharge (Leviticus 15:2-15). In the New Testament Jesus ...read more

Scripture: Luke 11:38-41

Denomination: Baptist

The Mosaic Law And The Christian Series

Contributed by Chuck Sligh on Jul 1, 2012

There is much confusion about the role of the law in the life of the believer. This "meaty" sermon unpacks this issue decisively .

The Mosaic Law and the Christian Series: The Old Testament’s Relation to the New Testament Believer Preaching PM Service July 1, 2012 TEXT: Colossians 2:12-14 – “Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 2:12-14

Denomination: Baptist

What Kinds Of Hands Do You Have?

Contributed by Dr. Odell Belger on Apr 25, 2022

In this sermon I want to talk to you about your hands.

Did you hear about the young couple that went to the mountains for a romantic winter break? • When they got there, the man went out to chop some wood. When he got back, he said, "Darling, my hands are freezing!" • She says, "Well put them in my warm hands and I will warm them up ...read more

Scripture: Jeremiah 18:1-6

Denomination: Baptist

"How Beautiful Are Your Feet?"

Contributed by Ken Sauer on Aug 5, 2005

Authentic faith always becomes a public matter, and believing with the heart leads to profession with the lips.

Romans 10:5-15 “How Beautiful are Your Feet?” By: Rev. Kenneth E. Sauer, Pastor of Parkview United Methodist Church, Newport News, VA www.parkview-umc.org There was a man who normally went barefoot, but once, when he had some money in his pocket, he went to the city and bought a pair of shoes ...read more

Scripture: Romans 10:5-15

Denomination: United Methodist

Reach Out To Jesus

Contributed by Scott Jensen on Jun 12, 2008

Reach through the crowds of life toward Jesus.

Reach out to Jesus By Pastor Scott Jensen Matthew 9:20-22 (also Mark 5:25-34 and Luke 8:43-47) Introduction In a popular “Saturday Night Live comedy” skit, one of the characters, Stuart Smalley, attempted to console people as they struggled with their issues and dilemmas. In one of the more ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 9:20-22

Denomination: Lutheran