Contributed by Brian Harvison on Apr 12, 2008
I can imagine this conversation in Heaven
It starts with me
Lord, I have sinned, I have done this awful thing and I pray for you to forgive me
As I pray God is listening and He says
Look at that filth, he disgusts me
His life is full of sin makes me want to puke
How dare he approach my holy throne
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Curt Cizek on Jul 22, 2008
Do you know where the phrase “buy the farm” comes from? It is actually rather recent in its usage. It started perhaps during WWI but certainly by WWII, having been recorded only in the 1950’s. Professor Jonathan Lighter has compiled the origin in the Random House Dictionary of American Slang.
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Contributed by Dean O'bryan on Sep 8, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 5,396 views
The story of the basset hound appeared in Tacoma, Washington newspaper. The dog's name was Tattoo. The reporter wrote, "Tattoo didn't plan on going for a run that evening, but when his owner accidentally shut the poor dog's leash in the car door and drove away from home, Tattoo had little choice."
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Steve Lotze on Sep 27, 2008
based on 4 ratings
| 3,327 views
Wait? -- I don't have to wait!! Why doesn't God just get up to speed?
Well, what if I we're going to go under a surgeons knife to redo my face - but I wanted to stay awake during the operation so that I could freely give out my counsel to the surgeon - and tell him to hurry! Hurry! If he was to
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Nov 17, 2008
John went to visit his old grandfather in a secluded area of Georgia. After chatting all night John’s grandfather made a breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast. However, John noticed a film on his plate, and questioned his grandfather, "Are these plates clean?"
His grandfather replied, "They’re as
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Mark Eberly on Dec 15, 2008
In our study group, it was mentioned that if someone broke in and stole all the Christmas gifts not to mention the decorations and Christmas ham, then most of us would have a pretty miserable Christmas. Very few of us would get up and see the empty house and walk outside and start singing the
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Church Of God
Contributed by Mark Eberly on Jan 30, 2009
Marriage and Creation
Your life started as the joining of two cells, One from your mother and one from your father. That cell from your dad made in an incredible journey as one of thousands. Each cell carries 23 chromosomes. When the cell from your dad and the cell from your mom met, they formed
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Contributed by Richard Francis on Jan 31, 2009
A W Tozer encouraged people wanting and having a "personal revival" to be seeking God with ALL of their Heart to consider these two points:
1. Get thoroughly dissatisfied with yourself. Complacency is the deadly enemy of spiritual progress. The contented soul is the stagnant soul. When speaking
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Ajai Prakash on Feb 3, 2009
Arabian horses go through rigorous training in the deserts of the Middle East. The trainers require absolute obedience from the horses, and test them to see if they are completely trained. The final test is almost beyond the endurance of any living thing. The trainers force the horses to do without
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Davon Huss on Mar 10, 2009
KEEPING THEM UP IN THE AIR
A pet store delivery truck driver was traveling down the road. Every time he came to a stoplight, he would get out of the truck and grab a 2 X 4. Then he’d run to the back and start beating on the truck’s back doors. This went on for several miles, and nobody could
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Mar 29, 2009
Mountain Climbers Help Each Other
In May 1953, two men became the first in history to climb to the top of Mt. Everest; Edmund Hillary, a New Zealand beekeeper and explorer, and his Sherpa guide from Nepal, Tenzing Norgay. They reached the summit together and attained instant international
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Other
Contributed by David Rumley on Apr 16, 2009
AS JONI EARICKSON TADA PUTS IT… The message He wanted to get across was that sin kills; Hell is real, but God is merciful, His kingdom can change you, and I am your passport. And anytime people missed that and started to come to Jesus simply to get their situations fixed, the Savior backed away.
I
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Apr 27, 2009
OBJECT LESSON: YOUR REPUTATION
(Light a candle on stage.) It’s easy to keep a fire going. What do you do to it? Not much. You work to get it started, and then it pretty much burns on its own. You may have to protect it, maybe do a little maintenance on it. But the fire is automatic. But if
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Dale Pilgrim on Jun 20, 2009
CLEANING IS HARD WORK
When I was in Bible College. Fridays were not fun. Those were the nights we had "work sections." You heard me -- "work sections." We changed out of our holy threads to work-clothes and started cleaning the College, from scrubbing potatoes to scrubbing floors. And none of this
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Denomination:
Salvation Army
Contributed by David Rumley on Dec 21, 2009
A bus carrying only ugly people that crashed into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. As they stand at the Pearly Gates waiting to enter Paradise and meet their maker, God decides to grant each person one wish because of the grief they have experienced. They’re all lined up, and God asks
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
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