Feeling Insignificant?

Feeling Insignificant?

Last night I attended Hillsong's Church's Vision Night for leaders with my daughter and son-in-law. We were in the first 3 rows and the music was awesome. I somehow ended up sitting between them and felt a little conspicuous. Completely inspiring listening to Joel Houston beat out such beautiful and passionate expressions of God's heart as we sang together, thousands of people. And this is just leaders night at Hillsong Church! Brian Houston spoke of an incredible vision he has for Hillsong Church. All of a sudden I felt so small. Insignificant. Oh yes, still very much a part of God's Church, but diminutive. Just a face in the crowd. What difference would it have made if I had not been there. Strange feeling. Excitement for what God is doing but a sense of the insignificance of my part in it all.

Genesis 10 is a string of names that are the descendents of Noah's sons, Ham, Shem and Japheth. It's boring to read and I wonder why God chose to record these names which we read over once, if that, and forget them before we have even read the next name. Who remembers Kittim and Rodanim? You remember them! No not Kitten and Rhododendron! Kittim and Rodanim! They were the sons of Javan. Who is Javan? No not the computer software guy. You know Noah? Well it was his grandson's son. So who cares? God does obviously! He made sure that Kittim and Rodanim were recorded in the pages of Scripture forever.

Ever feel like your just a name like that, lost in the pages of history and no real story to tell. Oh, you're there, but your just a name. No details. Just a name. At times I feel that way. What difference have I really made? Planted a Church, yes. Pastored a number of Churches, yes, but am I just a Kittim or Rodanim. When my life ends, who will remember me after my children? Pastors come and go. Churches move on. Who will remember you and the part you played in this world?

In Isaiah 49:16, when Jerusalem was lying in ruins, and the people of God were feeling a little insignificant and forgotten, God said "See, I have written your name on the palms of My hands..." All I know is that I know Jesus, and God has my name written on the palm of His hand just as He did with those in Jerusalem of old. He says to me (Isaiah 49:16 (NLT)) He hasn't forgotten me or forsaken me. Hey, He is saying this to you too. You are not forgotten or forsaken. You are important to Him and You are in His hands.