Contributed by Doug Lyon on Mar 3, 2008
based on 3 ratings
| 2,091 views
Jeff Foxworthy is a comedian who became famous through his “You Might Be A Redneck If …” routine. Well, I came across some “You Might Be A Preacher If …” statements.
You might be a preacher if …
· You’ve waded in a creek wearing a necktie
· You’d rather negotiate with terrorists than the church
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
based on 1 rating
| 1,922 views
One day a ninety-five year old woman at the nursing home received a visit
from one of her fellow church members.
“How are you feeling?” the visitor asked.
“Oh,” said the lady, “I’m just worried sick!”
“What are you worried about, dear?” her friend asked. “You look like you’re in good health. They
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 8, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 2,219 views
Ideal Love
a. There was a Dad who took his kids to do a little shopping. As they drove up, they spotted an eighteen-wheeler parked with a big sign on it that said, "Petting Zoo." The kids jumped up in a rush and asked, "Daddy, Daddy. Can we go? Please. Please. Can we go?"
"Sure," He said giving
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Contributed by Terry Barnhill on Apr 16, 2008
An employee of a department store once told this story. He was working as a store clerk in Sporting Goods one day when a manager came in. She proceeded to tell each employee what they were doing wrong and how they should change. The next day she came in again and was upset that none of her
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Denomination:
Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Jimmy Chapman on Apr 25, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 4,304 views
LOOKING AT THE MASTER
A pastor once told his congregation about a man who had a dog, and the man was trying to train his dog to be obedient. And what he would do was to take a large piece of meat--good, red, juicy meat that dogs would normally like to eat--and he would put it in the middle of the
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Peter Loughman on Apr 29, 2008
STILL HAS IT AFTER ALL THOSE YEARS
Years ago, I had this wonderful man in my congregation who looked exactly like, no kidding, Marlon Brando. Mitch was this huge man who had a heart of gold. He had lost his wife to cancer years earlier, but had fallen in love with Louise, a sweet woman just a few
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Scott Jensen on May 15, 2008
When you take a public speaking class, you’re often told that an attention getting step is one of the best ways to keep your audience focused on what you want them to hear. People tend to notice when you say something that seems out of place or show something people can look at. I once used a
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Contributed by David Moore on Jun 27, 2008
We have a saying in Northern Ireland about someone or something that is useless: we say it is "wick". And you know when you think about that, in a lampstand a wick, though it is needed for light, does not feature large in the production of light. Of itself it's pretty useless. Of itself it cannot
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Denomination:
Baptist
Illustration “Rights and responsibility”
In America we have the Statue of Liberty on the East coast but I often thought we need to have a Statue of Responsibility on the West coast to balance everything out here in America.
The Statue of Liberty in New York is known for its meaning of freedom and
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
based on 1 rating
| 2,087 views
Dr. Warren W. Wiersbe is a former pastor of Moody Church in Chicago who
For years was the General Director and Bible Teacher for the “Back to the Bible” radio
broadcast. In A TIME TO BE RENEWED he summarizes a life of thanksgiving and praise so well in reminding us: “Some people are
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Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Bruce Willis on Nov 29, 2006
based on 2 ratings
| 2,998 views
I remember an experience early in my life when God began teaching me to learn to listen for His voice and to turn to Him for help. I was outside playing on a sunny day. We had a maid, Beulah, who watched over us during the weekdays. Mother of course had 5 children in 6 years and 9 days, so we
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Scripture:
Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 20, 2007
You never know what your witness to the Gospel might be accomplishing. I shared the Gospel with a man over a 5 year period getting to the point of “popping the question” several times. Each time I offered “You can accept Christ right now!” He hesitated “No I’m just not ready.” I felt like I was
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[SOURCE: http://www.ocap.ca/songs/leanonme.html].
The Prince of Peace reminds us in John 16:33, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” Until He returns or calls us home, we are going to
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Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Kenneth Trent on Feb 8, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 2,240 views
An interesting incident happened during the victorious march of Alexander the Great to conquer the known world for the Grecian empire. A young soldier became greatly frightened in the heat of battle, dropped his sword and shield and fled. An officer dispatched several soldiers to apprehend the
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Denomination:
Baptist
based on 1 rating
| 6,090 views
It is in the hours of loneliness that God does some of His greatest works.
It was in the lonely dejection of Elijah that he heard God’s voice.
It was in the wearying lonely path of faith that God came again to Abraham.
It was in the lonely hours following failure that Peter found God.
It was in
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Scripture:
Denomination:
Pentecostal
based on 1 rating
| 1,789 views
There’s a secular group in Britain called “Join Me” that came up with a novel approach toward helping people, called “Good Fridays.” Each Friday they to take to the streets and carry out Random Acts of Kindness for the benefit of strangers. As the founder writes, “They took to their task with
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Denomination:
Episcopal/Anglican
Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 26, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 2,069 views
Warren Wiersbe tells a story about the days of the Old West. There was a horse bolting down the road with a wagon hitched to it and little boy trapped on the wagon. A young man risked his life to catch the horse and stop the wagon, saving that little boy.
Well, that little boy grew up to be a
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Contributed by Brian Harvison on Aug 16, 2008
based on 6 ratings
| 6,476 views
Priority Lesson
At a nursing home in Florida a resident group was discussing ailments. "My arms are so weak I can hardly life this cup of coffee," said one.
"Yes I know, my cataracts are so bad I can't even see my coffee," replied another.
"I can't turn my head because of the arthritis in my
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Denomination:
Baptist
Sermon Central