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In Sermon Illustrations: "Well Watered"

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  • A Charlie Brown Christmas

    Contributed by Charles Wallis on Dec 28, 2012
     | 4,915 views

    Television executives tried to reject The Charlie Brown Christmas story because it has the true story of Christmas. Charlie Brown has picked out an ugly tree, everyone laughs at him including Snoopy, and he screams out for someone to tell him the real meaning of Christmas. Linus begins to recite ...read more

  • Good News, Bad News

    Contributed by Ken Miller on Feb 22, 2013
    based on 1 rating
     | 6,626 views

    GOOD NEWS, BAD NEWS A gallery owner tells one of his artists that heÍs got some good new and bad news. The artist asks for the good news first. "Well," he replies, "the good news is that a man came in here today asking if the price of your paintings would go up after you died. When I told him they ...read more

  • Raptured?

    Contributed by Davon Huss on Nov 16, 2014
     | 6,329 views

    Herbert Washington, whom co-workers at Significant Plastics Inc. say was unduly concerned with the rapture and the second coming of Christ, suffered a serious heart attack when co-workers pretended they’d been caught away without him. "We didn’t mean to scare him to death," said one woman. "He’s ...read more

  • Once, When A Stubborn Disputer Seemed ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,946 views

    Once, when a stubborn disputer seemed unconvinced, Lincoln said, "Well, let’s see how many legs has a cow?" "Four, of course," came the reply disgustedly. "That’s right," agreed Lincoln. "Now suppose you call the cow’s tail a leg; how many legs would the cow have?" "Why, five, of course," was the ...read more

  • I Was In Wal Mart The Other Day And I Saw This ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,605 views

    I was in Wal Mart the other day and I saw this girl that had a shirt on that said, "Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful-- Okay, just hate me." I sorta chuckled and my little brother looked at me and said, "What’s so funny about that?" ANd I said, "Well, She sure does not need to be wearing that ...read more

  • A Teacher Asked The Children In Her Sunday ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,079 views

    A teacher asked the children in her Sunday school class, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would I get into Heaven?" "NO" The children all answered. "If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would ...read more

  • A Man Came Home From Work One Day And Discovered ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,289 views

    A man came home from work one day and discovered a monkey in the house. So he found his wife and asked her, “Where did the monkey come from?” She replied, “It was so cute I just had to have it, so I bought it ” The man was furious about sharing the house with a monkey so he said, “Where will the ...read more

  • 1) Kenneth Emerson Sauer, Pastor Of Parkview ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,615 views

    (1) Kenneth Emerson Sauer, Pastor of Parkview United Methodist Church, Newport News, VA tells that "At a men’s retreat a truck driver told about the change Christ had made in his life, and he was asked to think of some specific way in which he was different. After a pause, he said: “Well, when I ...read more

  • There Are Two (2) African Tribes Who Have An ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 4,030 views

    There are two (2) African tribes who have an unusual way of expressing thanks One of them, the Masai tribe, a pastoral and hunting people of Kenya and Tanzania, West Africa, bow and put their foreheads on the ground, and say, "My head is in the dirt." The other tribe, whose name I do not know, sit ...read more

  • The Bigger, The Better

    Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Jun 25, 2007
     | 1,339 views

    The Bigger the Better Joseph Stowell recounted a story: I was in West Africa—Timbuktu to be exact—and the missionaries were telling me that in that culture the larger the women were the more beautiful they were thought to be. In fact, a young missionary who had a small, trim wife said that the ...read more

  • Two Men Were Walking Along Discussing God, ...

    Contributed by Mark Eberly on Oct 15, 2007
     | 1,413 views

    Two men were walking along discussing God, eternity, and judgment. One of them stops and says, “You know, there is a question I’d like to ask God.” “What question?” his friend responds. “How could you let all the evil and despair and injustice occur in this world?” “Yeah, it doesn’t make sense!” ...read more

  • Expect To Lose 1/3 To 1/2 Half Of Your E-Mail ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 10, 2008
     | 2,077 views

    Expect to lose 1/3 to 1/2 half of your e-mail database every year due to list churn. For many, a significant portion of this churn results from a poorly implemented e-mail address change procedure. Or worse yet, none at all! When you don't help subscribers change addresses, not only will you lose ...read more

  • Out Of The Box

    Contributed by Terry Cavanaugh on May 9, 2008
     | 1,803 views

    OUT OF THE BOX One "boxed in" child was Adam Clarke, who was born in the eighteenth century in Ireland. When Adam was a schoolboy, his father told the teacher that Adam wouldn't do well. The teacher said, "He looks bright." That statement changed his life--let him out of the box his father had ...read more

  • A Little Boy Was Talking To The Girl Next Door: ...

    Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 3,228 views

    A little boy was talking to the girl next door: "I wonder what my mother would like for Mother’s Day." The girl answers: "Well, you could promise to keep your room clean and orderly -- you could go to bed as soon as she tells you -- you could go to her as soon as she calls you -- you could brush ...read more

  • Watching From The Bleachers

    Contributed by Michael Mccartney on Jan 21, 2009
     | 1,616 views

    Cymbala shares in his book, "Fresh Power": "But just as there are people who watch from the bleachers and never know the challenge of competing on the court, we have millions of churchgoers who sit in pews every week without ever entering the game. They sacrifice nothing, strain toward no ministry ...read more

  • A Man, Charged With Stealing A Turkey, Appeared ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 28, 2009
     | 3,034 views

    A man, charged with stealing a turkey, appeared in court. He told the judge that his action was an answer to prayer. When the judge asked him to explain, the man said: "Well, Judge, it was the night before Thanksgiving, and I didn’t have a turkey. I prayed for the Lord to send me one. At midnight I ...read more

  • When We Try To Figure Everything Out Instead Of ...

    Contributed by Charles Wallis on Feb 8, 2009
     | 1,499 views

    When we try to figure everything out instead of trusting God, we get cynical and miss out on miracles. "The Logical Song" by Supertramp: "When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful, a miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical. And all the birds in the trees, well they’d be singing so ...read more

  • Believers Happier

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 13, 2009
     | 3,712 views

    BELIEVERS HAPPIER People who believe in God are happier than agnostics or atheists, claim British researchers. They become even happier the more they pray and go to church. The report found religious people were better able to cope with disappointments such as unemployment or divorce than ...read more

  • Pastor, Don't Get Too Excited Over Compliments!

    Contributed by Garris Hudson on Jan 25, 2021
     | 1,904 views

    A NEW MAN AFTER THAT SERMON The minister’s sermon on this particular Sunday was considerably longer than normal. However, it was so well prepared and inspiring that he just knew it would be a big hit with the congregation. At the end of the service he stood shaking hands with the people as they ...read more

  • Daddy, Is God Dead?

    Contributed by Garris Hudson on Feb 13, 2022
     | 676 views

    A little girl looked up at her daddy while sitting on his lap and asked, "Daddy, I need to ask you something. Is God dead?" The father said, "Honey, why in the world are you asking me such a ridiculous question! What would make you ask me such a question?" His daughter ...read more