Contributed by Garris Hudson on Nov 20, 2022
THINGS YOU WILL NEVER HEAR IN MOST CHURCHES!
"Hey! It’s my turn to sit on the front pew!"
"I was so excited, I never even noticed your sermon went over time 25 minutes!"
"Personally, I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf."
"I volunteer to be the
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Garris Hudson on Nov 11, 2024
based on 1 rating
| 3,479 views
Since that very moment in the Garden of Eden when a single bite shattered the harmony of the world, man has tried to make his own way, be his own master, and set up his own kingdom. It's nothing new.
Nevertheless, if we want to be faithful followers of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ in this
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Garris Hudson on Nov 12, 2024
based on 1 rating
| 482 views
Marty, a little boy, was in church one Sunday with his mother Doris, when he started feeling sick. 'Mummy,' he inquired, 'can we leave now?'
'No,' his mother replied, 'the service isn't over yet.'
'Well, I think I'm about to throw up.' Marty
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
based on 1 rating
| 2,813 views
There is a popular children’s show on the Disney Channel called Out of the Box. The theme song is one of those songs that, once you’ve heard it, sticks in your mind all day. It ends with the words, “Out of the box, it’s really up to you what comes out of the box.”
In the business world the new
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by N A on Aug 29, 2006
QUOTE: “Often hobbling through our church doors on Sunday morning comes grace on crutches – sinners still unable to throw away their false supports and stand upright in the freedom of the children of God. Yet, their mere presence at church on Sunday morning is a flickering candle representing a
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*other
Contributed by Rich Young on Jan 17, 2001
based on 201 ratings
| 10,081 views
We should be like little Johnny. After church, Johnny tells his parents he has to go and talk to the minister right away. They agree and the pastor greets the family.
"Pastor," Johnny says, "I heard you say today that our bodies came from the dust & when we die our bodies go back to dust.”
"Yes,
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Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Mathews Itty on Mar 28, 2001
based on 123 ratings
| 2,096 views
In our native church in India, we have a system of giving testimonies on Sundays. Any believer could stand up and say what God has done for them in the past week. There was an old lady, who used to give her testimony almost every Sunday. Whenever she stood, she had one particular song to sing
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Mary Lewis on May 11, 2001
based on 95 ratings
| 2,550 views
One Sunday after church a pastor noticed that one of the men was wearing a lapel pin that had a bulldog on it. He was wearing it because he worked for Mack Truck and the bulldog is their logo, but the pastor didn’t know that.
So when he asked, "Frank, why are you wearing a pin of a bulldog?"
Frank
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Baptist
Contributed by Mike Richardson on May 16, 2001
based on 129 ratings
| 3,595 views
A Church called a new pastor at 60 years of age. His first sermon was 15 minutes long. Kinda short but fine for the folks. The next week he preached for 20 minutes. That was Ok, too. But the following week he preached for an hour and 45 minutes. Boy the deacons pulled him off to the side
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Tim Gibson on May 18, 2001
based on 99 ratings
| 2,807 views
Once I was praying for one of my Church members and the Lord gave me a picture of him carrying a sack with something kicking inside it. The Lord’s voice came very clearly saying ’Tell them to offer the person they are carrying as a burden to Me’ - this member said that he had been carrying
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*other
Contributed by Mark Hensley on May 31, 2001
based on 181 ratings
| 8,409 views
Too many people come to Church three times primarily. They're Baptized, they get married, and they have their funeral service at the Church.The first time they throw
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 22, 2001
based on 100 ratings
| 2,456 views
If you took all the people who attended church each Sunday and laid them end to end . . . . .
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Sermon Central