Contributed by Fred Sigle on Nov 6, 2006
A man and his wife who had been married for 45 years went on VACATION to Jerusalem. While they were there, the HUSBAND suddenly passed away with a HEART ATTACK. The FUNERAL DIRECTOR told the wife, “You can have your husband shipped HOME for $5,000, or you can BURY him here, in the Holy Land, for
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by John Shearhart on Jan 3, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 2,466 views
When she says:
“It’s your decision.” She really means, “The correct decision should be obvious by now.”
“Do what you want.” She really means, “You’ll pay for this later.”
“I’ll be ready in a minute. She really means, “Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.”
“You have to learn to
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Contributed by Bo Dunford on Jan 15, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 2,567 views
* I’ve learned the meaning of a few words that women
use from time to time. * For instance ... The word “Fine.”
* This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
C) “Five Minutes.” * If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour!
* Five minutes is
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Baptist
Contributed by Davon Huss on Feb 12, 2007
This fellow was very nervous as he contemplated asking Miss Jones to marry him. So he decided to ask her over the telephone. So he calls on the telephone.
And he says, "Is this Miss Jones?"
And she says, "Yes."
And he says, "Could I talk to you?"
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Jerry Caddell on Feb 16, 2007
Another young man was looking through the classifieds in search of a used car when he came upon an ad for a brand new Jaguar being sold for only $50. Surely he thought this was typo, but calling the number listed he was assured that $50 was correct. The next day he went by to see the car and to his
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Methodist
Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Jul 8, 2007
Illustration: Reverse Reasoning
Often when couples meet for premarital counselling, they are entranced in a rosy fog of optimism. Blinded to the shortcomings, each sees only the other’s good points. But as the excitement of the new marriage wears off, they often drift to the opposite extreme and
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Other
IF I COULD JUST CHANGE A FEW THINGS...
Gary Smalley states, "Most couples enter marriage hoping to achieve happiness. And for each of us, that vision of happiness takes a different form...Disappointment hits most couples shortly after the wedding because each partner begins to see faults and
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Larry Vinson on Aug 4, 2008
Interestingly enough, I read of a business that exists in Albuquerque, New Mexico designed specifically for those couples in America who have gone through or going through a divorce. The company is called Freedom Rings: Jewelry for the Divorced. Founded by jeweler and divorcee Lynn Peters, the
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Charles Jones on Aug 24, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 1,280 views
when the Man is out of place he is displaced because of not being in postion which causes the woman to be displaced or out of position because she notices that the Man is not in his position so she tries to take control because there aint no man in the
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Sep 7, 2008
I’m told that an angel came to Adam before Eve was created and said, “I have a proposition for you Adam. We are going to create for you an individual like you, but a little different – a female!” So Adam said, “Well what will she be all about? What will she do?” The angel told Adam, “She will take
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Baptist
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Sep 13, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 1,294 views
Pastor Dave Kinney said, "Can you imagine how different our marriages would be if every community, every church member, lived to bring glory to God? Men, if we set the example, I’m
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Baptist
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Sep 13, 2008
Maybe you heard about the wife that went down to the police station with her next door neighbor to report her husband was missing. The police officer asks for his description. So she told the officer, “Well, he’s 6 foot 2, blond, blue eyes, 35 years old, 185 pounds, great smile, wonderful with kids
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Baptist
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Sep 20, 2008
I read the other day - you show me a man who comes home greeted with a big smile, encouraged to take off his shoes, served a wonderful dinner sitting on a pillow arranged on the floor a special
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Baptist
Contributed by Brian Lewis on Sep 25, 2008
A husband and wife were preparing to have breakfast when the wife asked, "why do I always have to make the coffee?"
The husband answered, "because you’re the wife; that’s your job."
The wife replied, "well, the Bible doesn’t say it’s the women’s job to make the coffee; it’s the man’s!"
Taken
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Baptist
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Sep 27, 2008
A funeral service was being held for a woman who had just passed away. At the end of the service the pall bearers were carrying the casket out of the chapel when they accidently hit the wall and it jarred the casket pretty hard. Then all of the sudden there was a faint groan coming from the casket.
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Baptist
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