Contributed by Andrew Chan on May 9, 2002
based on 12 ratings
| 1,721 views
Here are some examples of some mothers and what they could have SAID:
MONA LISA’S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I spent on braces, Mona, that’s the biggest smile you can give us?"
HUMPTY DUMPTY’S MOTHER: "Humpty, if I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a hundred times not to sit on
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Denomination:
Evangelical Free
Contributed by Mark Hensley on May 11, 2002
based on 6 ratings
| 51,282 views
A teacher asked a boy this question: “Suppose your mother baked a pie and there were seven of you—your parents and five children. What part of the pie would you get?” “A sixth,” replied the boy. “I’m afraid you don’t know your fractions,” said the teacher. “Remember, there are seven of you.”
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Greg Nance on May 13, 2002
based on 65 ratings
| 1,438 views
Several of us go pick up the inner city kids and bring them to Bible classes once a week. One of the questions I like to ask the kids at Inner City is this:
Does you mamma love you? They always answer, “Yes!” Then I ask them why and they tell me, “She has to, she’s my mamma!”
You can’t ask
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Jerry Fenter on May 23, 2002
based on 18 ratings
| 6,284 views
A FATHER'S ROLE
“The most urgent domestic challenge facing the United States at the close of the 20th century is the re-creation of fatherhood as a social role for men.”
“A good father does these basic things: provides for his family, protects his family, and gives
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
based on 5 ratings
| 3,980 views
TEN THINGS A MOM DOESN’T WANT TO HEAR
1. I swallowed a goldfish.
2. Your lipstick works better than crayons.
3. Does grape juice leave a stain???
4. The principal called...
5. But DAD says that word all the time.
6. What’s it cost to fix a window???
7. Has anyone seen my earthworms???
8. I
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 7, 2002
based on 28 ratings
| 2,612 views
THE TOP TEN THINGS YOU LEARNED FROM YOUR FATHER
10.When he was your age, kids had to walk six miles to school
in the snow and rain . . . uphill both ways.
9. If he had acted like you, his father would have knocked
him into the middle of next week.
8. When he was your age, kids had to make
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 9, 2002
based on 6 ratings
| 3,069 views
DON'T SWEAT MESSING UP
Most men think that they have to be perfect when they’re with their kids. This is not only not good, it's bad training. Better you should just continue being a mess-up. Fall off your bike. Drop an easy pop fly. Order a really dumb product from some lame infomercial you
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Contributed by Donald Smith on Apr 23, 2003
based on 56 ratings
| 2,666 views
THE FATHER'S DAY TOP TEN LIST OF
THINGS YOU'VE BEEN ITCHIN'TO SAY FOR YEARS NOW...
We often hear "the rules" from the feminine side. Ok
- well now hear the guys’ side - it’s only fair - - realizing of course that Father’s Day is the only day of the year we could get away with it!)
#10 Whenever
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Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Donnie Martin on May 11, 2003
based on 2 ratings
| 5,078 views
A fifteen-year-old boy came bounding into the house and found his mom in bed. He asked if she were sick or something. He was truly concerned. Mom replied that, as a matter of fact, she didn’t feel too well. The son replied, “Well, don’t worry a bit about dinner. I’ll be happy to
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Denomination:
Baptist
based on 1 rating
| 1,645 views
Axelrod shares this story about a magnificent mom:
There is a story about four preachers discussing their favorite translations of the Bible. The first one said, "I like the King James Version because of its beautiful English." Another said, "I like the New American Standard version because it¡¦s
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Davon Huss on Jun 16, 2003
based on 91 ratings
| 1,670 views
C. Recent research is shining light on the importance of male spiritual leadership in the home. Among their findings is the reality that 68 million of our nation’s 94 million men don’t attend any church. This, in spite of the fact, that 86% of them grew up with some sort of church background.
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Davon Huss on Jun 16, 2003
based on 6 ratings
| 1,375 views
In an Eastern city a prominent man became greatly concerned about his boy, and consequently went to the boy’s school principal and asked for suggestions. The principal gave this reply: “Resign from the presidency of the chamber of commerce. Leave that position to someone whose family has grown
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Kenneth Squires on Jun 17, 2003
based on 23 ratings
| 2,494 views
FOR YOU, MOTHER
This is for all the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms, wiping up barf full of Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, "It’s OK honey, Mommy’s here."
This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Jim Kane on Jul 3, 2003
based on 26 ratings
| 3,536 views
A SURVEY OF FATHERS
The June 2003 issue of Family Circle Magazine contained results from a recent national survey of fathers. It had some interesting results:
* 94% feel building a family is the hardest and most important thing
a man can do.
* 71% say fatherhood is more demanding than
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 26, 2004
based on 11 ratings
| 1,506 views
TOP TEN LIST OF WHAT MOMS REALLY WANT FOR MOTHER'S DAY
10. To be able to eat a whole candy bar (alone) and drink a Coke
without any "floaters."
9. To have a 14-year-old answer a question without rolling her eyes
in that "Why is this person my mother?" way.
8. Five pounds of
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Contributed by Sermon Central on May 4, 2004
based on 6 ratings
| 1,591 views
ACCORDING TO THE NUMBERS
82: Percentage of women ages 40-44 who are mothers (down from
90% in 1976)
4 million: Number of women a year who become mothers (or about 40%
of all births in a year)
25.1: Average age of first-time mothers (a record high, up
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Contributed by Sermon Central on May 4, 2004
based on 6 ratings
| 1,797 views
WHAT TO GET MOM
Survey after survey tries to detemine what women really want for Mother’s Day.
According to a survey by Circuit City, less than 5% of mothers surveyed prefer candy. 30% prefer flowers, and almost that many — 27% — want a digital camera.
A survey of new moms by The First
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Contributed by Sermon Central on May 5, 2004
based on 5 ratings
| 1,664 views
WHAT DO MOTHERS WANT?
Maggie Gallagher is President of the Institute for Marriage and Public Policy and a co-author of The Case for Marriage.
As an early-forties mom, she is beginning to regret the children that she never had. She always wanted four, but career and life left her with two.
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Contributed by Sermon Central on May 5, 2004
based on 10 ratings
| 1,934 views
QUESTIONS ABOUT MOMS
What’s the difference between moms and dads?
~ Moms work at work and work at home, and dads just got to work at work.
~ Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
~ Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power ’cause that’s who you gotta ask
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