Contributed by Victor Yap on Jan 8, 2003
based on 8 ratings
| 4,997 views
A joke on the management of cows has been circulating for many years under the subject “World Economics,?“World Politics,?or “World Ideologies?
Communism: You have two cows. The government takes both, milks them, keeps the milk, and gives you a pint.
Socialism: The government takes one of your cows
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Independent/Bible
Contributed by Mark Eberly on Feb 23, 2009
There is an old pizza delivery joke that when someone comes into the shop to ask for directions the standard reply is, “You can’t there from here.” When you are loaded down with guilt, and all your emotional baggage, and all the comforts and securities of life that you have earned, then you can’t
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Church Of God
Contributed by Bruce Blythe on Oct 23, 2021
Made this one up for my sermon on the whole Book of Romans (Works, Grace & Living).
Hope some people find it helpful.
Blessings.
Bruce
A Jew, and an Islamic, and a Christian were drinking coffee.
As they sat and talked the conversation turned toward God.
The Islamic said, “Now, regular prayer
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Baptist
based on 1 rating
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Several years ago, when fathers were not with the mom for her delivery, a group of expectant fathers were in a waiting room, while their wives were in the process of delivering babies.
A nurse came in and announced to one man that his wife had just given birth to twins. "That's quite a
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Paul Fritz on Dec 25, 2001
based on 81 ratings
| 5,337 views
The Work of Christmas
When the song of the angels is stilled,
When the star in the sky is gone,
When the kings and princes are home,
When the shepherds are back with their flock,
The work of Christmas begins:
To find the lost,
To heal the broken,
To feed the hungry,
To release the
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 24, 2002
based on 11 ratings
| 7,232 views
MEANING OF CHRISTMAS?
A television interviewer was walking the streets of Tokyo at Christmas time. Much as in America, Christmas shopping is a big commercial success in Japan. The interviewer stopped one young woman on the sidewalk, and asked, "What is the meaning of Christmas?"
Laughing, she
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 24, 2002
based on 5 ratings
| 5,025 views
THE PERCEPTION OF CHRISTMAS
To perceive Christmas through its wrappings becomes more difficult with every year.
SOURCE: E. B. White, The Second Tree
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 24, 2002
based on 21 ratings
| 6,956 views
HOME FOR CHRISTMAS
In December 1903, after many attempts, the Wright brothers were successful in getting their "flying machine" off the ground. Thrilled, they telegraphed this message to their sister Katherine: "We have actually flown 120 feet. Will be home for Christmas." Katherine hurried to
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 10, 2002
based on 16 ratings
| 10,203 views
CHRISTMAS SIGNS
- From a toy store: "Ho, ho, ho spoken here."
- In a bridal boutique: "Marry Christmas."
- Outside a church: "The original Christmas Club."
- From a department store: "Big pre-Christmas sale. Come in and mangle with the crowd."
- In a Texas jewelry store: "Diamond tiaras: $70,000.
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Contributed by Bernard Dawson on Dec 14, 2002
based on 12 ratings
| 5,437 views
ALONE ON CHRISTMAS
George Mason’s life was centered in his business. He lived alone and refused all invitations to socialize. His brother’s family had urged him to visit but the children always made too much noise. Besides, he didn’t want to buy presents for his nephews and nieces. Instead he
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Denomination:
Holiness
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 16, 2002
based on 16 ratings
| 4,617 views
FINALLY CHRISTMAS
Senator John McCain of Arizona was a prisoner of war during the Vietnam conflict. He was shot down and held as a prisoner of war in Hanoi for 5 ½ years, 1967-1973, spending much of it in solitary confinement.John McCain said this, “When I was being mistreated by the North
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based on 7 ratings
| 4,481 views
CHRISTMAS SIGNS
- From a toy store: "Ho, ho, ho spoken here."
- In a bridal boutique: "Marry Christmas."
- Outside a church: "The original Christmas Club."
- From a department store: "Big pre-Christmas sale. Come in and mangle with the crowd."
- In a Texas jewelry store: "Diamond tiaras: $70,000.
...read more
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Denomination:
Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Dec 12, 2003
based on 6 ratings
| 5,058 views
[A Christmas Story, unknown]
I remember my first Christmas adventure with Grandma. I was just a kid.
I remember tearing across town on my bike to visit her on the day my big sister dropped the bomb: "There is no Santa Claus," she jeered. "Even dummies know that!" (Rejection!)
My Grandma was not
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 6, 2004
based on 4 ratings
| 4,407 views
CHRISTMAS SURVEY
What do people believe about the birth of Christ? A few days ago Newsweek Magazine conducted a poll asking some questions about Christ and His birth.* Here are some of the results:
67% - believe that the entire story of Christmas is historically accurate
24% - believe the story
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based on 2 ratings
| 6,963 views
The Christmas tree:
It was on a Tree that God hung His greatest gift to humankind. The Christmas tree is symbolic of a broken curse, its evergreen branches representing everlasting life. Our exchange of gifts isn’t a surrender to commercialism, but
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
based on 17 ratings
| 5,230 views
Christmas Present
It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. Pastor Mike was looking at the nativity scene outside when he noticed the baby Jesus was missing from the figures.
Immediately, Pastor Mike turned towards the church to call the police. But as he was about to do so,
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Steve Smith on Dec 4, 2006
based on 5 ratings
| 5,356 views
ILL: Christmas Season
Listen to this parody of the Christmas season that I read this past week:
"And there were in the same country children keeping watch over there stockings by the fireplace. And lo! And was said unto them `Fear not, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy that is for
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Baptist
Contributed by Steve Smith on Dec 4, 2006
based on 1 rating
| 4,316 views
ILL: FINALLY CHRISTMAS
Senator John McCain of Arizona was a prisoner of war during the Vietnam conflict. He was shot down and held as a prisoner of war in Hanoi for 5 ½ years, 1967-1973, spending much of it in solitary confinement.
John McCain said this, “When I was being mistreated by the North
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Denomination:
Baptist
CHRISTMAS PANTS
I told you about a pair of guys who had exchanged the same pair of moleskin pants for over a decade. Each year they tried to outdo one another with the only rules being they couldn’t damage the pants and they had to use scrap material. I’d left the story with Kunkel having received
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Presbyterian/Reformed
Contributed by Ross Cochrane on Dec 27, 2009
The REAL CHRISTMAS ICON
in some ways should have been JOHN THE BAPTIST
Instead of a RED SUIT
we would have people in CAMEL’S HAIR and LEATHER BELTS
walking around the shopping centres
shouting “PREPARE THE WAY OF THE LORD”,
and giving out SAMPLES OF WILD LOCUSTS AND HONEY
for people to try.
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Sermon Central