Sermons on Jokes:

God Has A Clock? Series

Contributed by Paul Clemente on Dec 30, 2013

Better early for Jesus Christ than late!

What day is it?? Okay, but this is the only time I’m going to ask you this, take a look at your watches or cellphone; what time is it?? And so, it is Sunday at 11: am and you chose to be at church. We have clocks and calendars to plan our lives! And so next week, which will be a New Year, ...read more

Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:1-11

Denomination: Independent/Bible

No Regrets

Contributed by Gerald Roberts on Oct 3, 2013

The rich man dies and leaves his self with eternity and many regrets that will haunt him forever.

Don’t Have Regrets Luke 16:19-31 Many jokes link regret to the choice of a mate. (According to one, a woman inserts an ad in the classifieds: "Husband ...read more

Scripture: Luke 16:19-31

Denomination: Methodist

The Church's Healing Mission Series

Contributed by W Pat Cunningham on Dec 8, 2012

Jesus healed the whole person; so the Church has the mission to bring the world to His healing touch through the sacraments.

December 10, 2012 Monday of 2nd Week in Advent Gaudium et Spes Let’s be very clear about one thing in today’s lesson from Isaiah–the Judean desert is nothing to joke about. Hot, desolate and arid, it devours lost travelers just as easily as its scarce rainfall. The people ...read more

Scripture: Luke 5:17-26

Denomination: Catholic

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Contributed by Gaither Bailey on Aug 3, 2012

Sermon for the 10th Sunday after Pentecost, Year B.

John 6: 24 – 35 / More Intro: I want you to imagine this morning that you are a solitary traveler in a lonely desert. As you travel, you become very thirsty. Just ahead you see a rusty old pump at the edge of an oasis. Handing on the pump is a note that reads, “I have buried a ...read more

Scripture: Luke 6:24-35

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

The Bible Teaches By Word-Plays Series

Contributed by W Pat Cunningham on Jul 7, 2012

There are many forms of the Word of God, by which God teaches us of His intention to bring us into eternal union with Jesus, the Bridegroom.

Monday of 14th Week in Course Verbum Domini The Word of God is changeless. First, the content of the Word of God is always the same–Love poured out for human beings, for us all. Second, the person of the Word of God is always the same, Jesus Christ, the enfleshment of the Father’s ...read more

Scripture: Hosea 2:16-22

Denomination: Catholic

Amazed At Unbelief

Contributed by Gaither Bailey on Jul 7, 2012

Sermon for Proper 9, Year B

Mark 6: 1 – 13 / Amazed At Unbelief Intro: When I was first ordained, I lived in Indiana. Each time I returned to Fayette City, I was asked to play the organ and preach. It was interesting to me that more comments were made about my musical ability than my preaching. Several years later, ...read more

Scripture: Mark 6:1-13

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

Where's The River If It Doesn't Rain?

Contributed by Gaither Bailey on Feb 28, 2013

Sermon for the 3rd Sunday in Lent, Year C, 2013

Luke 13: 1 – 9 / Where’s The River If It Doesn’t Rain? Intro: I recently received an email containing several interesting questions: 1) why does the executioner rub alcohol on the arm of a person about to receive a lethal injection? 2) Why do we call the time of day when ...read more

Scripture: Luke 13:1-9

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

What Kind Of Shepherd?

Contributed by Gaither Bailey on May 2, 2009

What kind of shepherd are you looking for in your life?

John 10: 11 – 18 What Kind of Shepherd? Intro: There was once a blonde who was really sick of all the blonde jokes. She decided to dye her hair and change her hairstyle. After her new makeover, she decided to take a drive through the countryside. She happened upon a shepherd with a large herd ...read more

Scripture: John 10:11-18

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

One Line Parables

Contributed by Paul Zwarich on Jul 25, 2008

Even though the rich blessings God intends for us may appear to be of no more value than a seed or a handful of yeast we should not deceive ourselves.

Lectionary 17 A Matthew 13:31-33, 44-52 This morning we heard a number of “One – Line Parables” that Jesus used to describe the Kingdom of God to illustrate how God’s power and authority is visible and expressed in our world. Unlike the longer “Story Parables” like the Good Samaritan or the ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 13:31-52

Denomination: Lutheran

Part 9 - Matthew 9:27-31 - Have A Girl Look And You'll Find It! Series

Contributed by Ross Cochrane on Mar 27, 2010

Many people have eyes but cannot see. They need to have a "GIRL LOOK" if they are ever to find Christ. And by that I don't mean I have to be a wimp. I just mean I need to seek Him with all my heart.

Part 9 - Matthew 9:27-31 - HAVE A GIRL LOOK AND YOU'LL FIND IT! My granddaughter was here yesterday. She is two years old. I pointed out some Pelicans sitting on a pole, but for a long time she could not see them. She didn't know where to look. I should talk. I ask my wife sometimes "Where are the ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 9:27-31

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Being First Means Being Last

Contributed by Craig Condon on Jul 29, 2015

Jesus said that anyone who wants to be first in God’s Kingdom must be last on earth by serving everyone, including the less fortunate.

Good morning boys and girls! :) It’s been a long time since I’ve seen most of you! How was your summer? Did you do lots of fun stuff? Did you play lots of sports? How many of you won or were on a team that won? It’s fun to win, isn’t it? Now, who actually lost or was on a ...read more

Scripture: Mark 9:30-37

Denomination: Anglican

How Will You Die? Series

Contributed by Grant Adams on Mar 30, 2020

I don’t mean by what means will you die, like an accident, heart attack, or cancer. But by what spiritual state will your life be in when you die. In the bible, many have died in many different conditions.

I don’t mean by what means will you die, like an accident, heart attack, or cancer. But by what spiritual state will your life be in when you die. In the bible, many have died in many different conditions. 1. Rich man died unprepared. Luke 16 2. Ananias died unclean. Acts 5 3. Stephen died ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 9:27

Denomination: Baptist

Unexpected Funeral - Man

Contributed by Perry Greene on May 1, 2020

A heart attack cut this life short.

Funerals Provide: • An Opportunity to Mourn • An Opportunity to Give and Receive Comfort • An Opportunity to Honor, Remember, and Give Thanks • An Opportunity to Declare Our Hope in Jesus Funerals remind us of: a. The Certainty of Death (Ecclesiastes 9:5) b. The Shortness of life (James ...read more

Scripture: 1 John 3:1

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Joint Account Series

Contributed by Shawn Drake on Feb 24, 2019

This is the 7th sermon in the "Accounting" series from the Book of Ephesians.

Series: Accounting [#7] JOINT ACCOUNT Ephesians 2:11-18 Introduction: Paul began the book of Ephesians with praise and continued with prayer and then he began to preach. Paul preached that we are made alive in Christ, raised up with Christ, and seated in Heavenly places in Christ. We are saved ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 2:11-18

Denomination: Baptist

It's Not The Size Of The Dog

Contributed by Robert Tallent on Aug 18, 2018

A sermon about the power of God

It’s not the size of the Dog Exodus 12:4 Mark Twain is credited with saying: "It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog." How was David able to challenge ...read more

Denomination: Baptist