Sermons on Joke:

One Line Parables

Contributed by Paul Zwarich on Jul 25, 2008

Even though the rich blessings God intends for us may appear to be of no more value than a seed or a handful of yeast we should not deceive ourselves.

Lectionary 17 A Matthew 13:31-33, 44-52 This morning we heard a number of “One – Line Parables” that Jesus used to describe the Kingdom of God to illustrate how God’s power and authority is visible and expressed in our world. Unlike the longer “Story Parables” like the Good Samaritan or the ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 13:31-52

Denomination: Lutheran

Part 9 - Matthew 9:27-31 - Have A Girl Look And You'll Find It! Series

Contributed by Ross Cochrane on Mar 27, 2010

Many people have eyes but cannot see. They need to have a "GIRL LOOK" if they are ever to find Christ. And by that I don't mean I have to be a wimp. I just mean I need to seek Him with all my heart.

Part 9 - Matthew 9:27-31 - HAVE A GIRL LOOK AND YOU'LL FIND IT! My granddaughter was here yesterday. She is two years old. I pointed out some Pelicans sitting on a pole, but for a long time she could not see them. She didn't know where to look. I should talk. I ask my wife sometimes "Where are the ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 9:27-31

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Do Over

Contributed by Gaither Bailey on Mar 5, 2010

Sermon using the parable of the fig tree to speak of the relationship between repentance and bearing fruit.

9 / Do Over Intro: Three demons got together and they were trying to find ways to conquer the world. The 1st demon went throughout the world proclaiming, “There is not God!” Even though few people acted as if there was a God, they knew in their hearts that this message was not true. The 2nd ...read more

Scripture: Luke 13:1-9

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

The Neighbourly Kindness Of The Hated Samaritan

Contributed by Christopher Holdsworth on May 6, 2016

Jesus sees us in our plight, naked and left for dead by the ravishes of sin in our lives. He picks us up, binds us, anoints us, and takes us to a place of safety.

THE NEIGHBOURLY KINDNESS OF THE HATED SAMARITAN. Luke 10:25-37. This well-known parable is best understood within the framework of the question-and-answer narrative between “a certain lawyer” (an expert in the Scripture), and Jesus (Luke 10:25). The motives of the would-be student may well be ...read more

Scripture: Luke 10:25-37

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Newnes Of Life, First Hand!

Contributed by Neal Gracey on Jul 29, 2016

Happy “Newness” Sunday, Everyone Friends, when Jesus Christ enters your life, you don’t grow wings; you don’t develop a halo, and you are miles and miles from being holy. When Jesus Christ comes into your life, the battle begins!

Happy “Newness” Sunday, Everyone! When my wife and I (finally) gave our lives over to Christ, the scenery around our house changed. No, the trees outside were the same, the furniture in the living room was the same, all the aquarium fish were still the same fish. What changed were the ...read more

Scripture: Romans 6:1-23

Denomination: Baptist

Let Go Of The Woodworm's Hand!

Contributed by Dr. Ronald Shultz on Aug 27, 2016

Stop trying to hold together what God is not holding up!

Looking for surveyors jokes/stories for my speaking engagement next month, I came across this one. Surveyor: This house is a ruin. I wonder what stops it from falling down. Owner: I think the woodworms are holding hands. source: http://www.jokebuddha.com/Surveyor/recent#ixzz4IYOEUKGF Rev 3:1 ...read more

Scripture: Revelation 3:1

Denomination: Baptist

What Kind Of Shepherd?

Contributed by Gaither Bailey on May 2, 2009

What kind of shepherd are you looking for in your life?

John 10: 11 – 18 What Kind of Shepherd? Intro: There was once a blonde who was really sick of all the blonde jokes. She decided to dye her hair and change her hairstyle. After her new makeover, she decided to take a drive through the countryside. She happened upon a shepherd with a large herd ...read more

Scripture: John 10:11-18

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

Amos--- God,s Able Prophet

Contributed by Dr.w.samuel Legon on Aug 4, 2009

Able body men to take a stand.

AMOS--- GOD,S ABLE PROPHET No doubt Amos lived in a day similar to ours Lawlessness, worldliness, wickedness and ungodliness. A day of rape, riots, robbery and rottenness shooting and unrighteousness. How ever God’s prophet Amos was ready . Amos 7: 10 Then Amaziah the priest of Bethel ...read more

Scripture: Amos 7:10-17

Denomination: Baptist

Where's The River If It Doesn't Rain?

Contributed by Gaither Bailey on Feb 28, 2013

Sermon for the 3rd Sunday in Lent, Year C, 2013

Luke 13: 1 – 9 / Where’s The River If It Doesn’t Rain? Intro: I recently received an email containing several interesting questions: 1) why does the executioner rub alcohol on the arm of a person about to receive a lethal injection? 2) Why do we call the time of day when ...read more

Scripture: Luke 13:1-9

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

The Church's Healing Mission Series

Contributed by W Pat Cunningham on Dec 8, 2012

Jesus healed the whole person; so the Church has the mission to bring the world to His healing touch through the sacraments.

December 10, 2012 Monday of 2nd Week in Advent Gaudium et Spes Let’s be very clear about one thing in today’s lesson from Isaiah–the Judean desert is nothing to joke about. Hot, desolate and arid, it devours lost travelers just as easily as its scarce rainfall. The people ...read more

Scripture: Luke 5:17-26

Denomination: Catholic

Like A Tree Planted By The Water

Contributed by Marilyn Murphree on Sep 25, 2018

We are like a well tended tree, not one that has just sprung up

Isaiah 46:4 Like a Tree planted by the Water “Old age ain’t no place for sissies” is a saying on my coffee mug. Advancing years brings a variety of aches and pains that would like to take over in our body and bring along a feeling of discouragement and depression if we let it. As birthdays come ...read more

Scripture: Isaiah 46:4

Denomination: Methodist

Offerings And Worship Series

Contributed by Paul Clemente on Oct 29, 2018

what made the israelites of old follow God in worship?

We continue to learn about God and people from the Book of Exodus. We are now in Exodus 30 where the Israelites are in the desert on their way to the Promised Land of Canaan but they were waiting for their Leader Moses who was up on the mountain getting instructions from God. Before we read and ...read more

Scripture: Exodus 30:1-38

Denomination: Independent/Bible

It's Not The Size Of The Dog

Contributed by Robert Tallent on Aug 18, 2018

A sermon about the power of God

It’s not the size of the Dog Exodus 12:4 Mark Twain is credited with saying: "It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog." How was David able to challenge ...read more

Denomination: Baptist

Ahaz, Isaiah And The Call Of The Virgin Series

Contributed by W Pat Cunningham on Dec 15, 2018

We need to listen to His word, and say with Mary, “I am the servant of the Lord, let His will be done in my life.”

December 20 Pre-Christmas Novena The richness of today’s Scripture lessons cannot be exaggerated. There is so much here that literally books have been written about two passages. We are tempted to exegesis instead of exhortation, but without a little of the former, the latter is made ...read more

Scripture: Isaiah 7:10-14, Luke 1:26-38

Denomination: Catholic

Should A Pastor Be Paid

Contributed by Dr. Ronald Shultz on Jun 20, 2019

Whether FT or PT a workman is worthy of his hire.

Someone posted a comment about paid pastors not being biblical as well as one man only pastors not biblical. My answer was – Actually. paid ministers are biblical. That there should be a multiplicity of elders rather a single man, I agree, but they can all be paid, but the one who is the main man ...read more

Scripture: 1 Timothy 5:17-18, 2 Corinthians 11:8, Galatians 6:6, 1 Corinthians 9:5-14

Denomination: Baptist