Sermons on Joke:

Baptism Message (Adult)

Contributed by Scott Jensen on Oct 8, 2008

Baptism is an outward act, with visible elements, that is key to the inward attitude and acceptance into God’s kingdom.

Baptism Before performing a baptism, the pastor approached the young father and said solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?" "I think so," the man replied. "My wife has made appetizers and we have a caterer coming to provide plenty of cookies and cakes for all of our ...read more

Scripture: Acts 22:12-16, Acts 22:12

Denomination: Lutheran

Choosing The Path Of Most Resistance Series

Contributed by David Smith on Jun 18, 2009

When they were approaching Jerusalem, at Bethphage and Bethany, near the Mount of Olives, he sent two of his disciples and said to them, “Go into the village ahead of you, and immediately as you enter it, you will find tied there a colt that has never bee

I’m sure we all know the joke about how many social workers it takes to change a light bulb. It only takes one, of course, but the light bulb has got to want to change. I think it was social workers that were the target of that joke, but it could equally well have been psychotherapists, ...read more

Scripture: Mark 11:1-11

Denomination: Episcopal/Anglican

Another Advent

Contributed by Dale Pilgrim on Dec 29, 2009

The world and religious possibilities can blind us to truth. The evidence of Christ encourages us to be renewed in trust that what Jesus speaks will come to pass.

Another Advent Scripture/text: Mark 13:32-36 Leafs – rough start to their Season. First eight games were loses. Then hope was born … we got Phil Kessel of the Boston Bruins! Haven’t won the cup since 1967 – yes, I was only 5 years old. People laugh. Leaf jokes are now hotter than Newfie ...read more

Scripture: Mark 13:32-36

Denomination: Salvation Army

M Is For Majesty Series

Contributed by Larry Brincefield on May 30, 2007

A study of the word Majestic or Majesty

Introduction 1. JOKE 2. As we continue to learn our ABCs... We come to the letter M... M is for Majesty or majestic... According to the Dictionary...Majesty means... impressive stateliness, dignity, or beauty : experience the majesty of the Rockies. 2 royal power : the majesty of the royal ...read more

Scripture: Deuteronomy 5:24

Denomination: Nazarene

Funeral Service For Frances Simpson

Contributed by Davon Huss on Apr 4, 2006

A funeral message from Romans 8:18-39. Frances had a muscular disease that first took away her voice and then her strength.

Funeral Service for Frances Simpson 4/1/2006 - Express condolences and appreciation. - Today is April Fools Day and how I wish this was all a joke but it is not. We come here to mourn the death of Frances Dorsett Simpson. No, that is a joke; we come here to celebrate the life of Frances Simpson ...read more

Scripture: Romans 8:18-39

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

When Jesus Comes: No Respect Series

Contributed by Joseph Smith on Apr 17, 2010

Christmas Eve 1988: When Jesus comes as an infant, there is no respect, for he is the child of an unwed mother and is poor. When Jesus comes to the end of his life, there is no respect. But He redeems His status and can redeem ours.

Comedian Rodney Dangerfield has made en entire career out of a single piece of business and a single punch line: "I don't get no respect". He will regale you with tales of his childhood, when the other kids used him as a punching bag and called him a host of unflattering names, and then he sums it ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 1:18-25

Denomination: Baptist

Can You Hear Me Series

Contributed by Shawn Drake on Apr 27, 2010

This is the 1st sermon in the series "Conversations With God". When God doesn't seem to care, what do you do?

Family Worship April 18, 2010 Bel Aire Baptist Church Series: Conversations With God [#1] CAN YOU HEAR ME? Habakkuk 1:1-4 Introduction: The other day at the pool, I met the younger sister of a new swimmer on the High School team. She said that she had driven by the house and saw ...read more

Scripture: Habakkuk 1:1-4

Denomination: Baptist

Joseph (Pt.1) When Life Rips You Off Series

Contributed by Brad Bailey on Sep 22, 2006

Intro: Story (Paul Harvey’s ‘The Rest of the Story’ p.115 of Col. Herland Sanders) wouldn’t you like to know the REST OF THE STORY? But, in those times when we’re down, it’s not easy to see any future to believe in the rest of the story; to believe ther

Intro: Story (Paul Harvey’s ‘The Rest of the Story’ p.115 of Col. Herland Sanders) wouldn’t you like to know the REST OF THE STORY? But, in those times when we’re down, it’s not easy to see any future to believe in the rest of the story; to believe there is a story at all. - Those times when ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 37:1-5

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Loving The Creator

Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Jan 28, 2014

The awesomeness of God makes us respect and fear Him, yet His love helps us to hope in Him. So, a look at this Psalm will help us remember it.

-Bible is a wealth of writing. Different types of literature: history, genealogy, parable, biography, gospel, prophecy, poetry: the Psalms. -The Psalms give us more than just words for neat choruses. They give us the right words to use when we address God! They show us how to express our joy, ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 33:1-22

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Hope For The Hopeless

Contributed by Don Schultz on Feb 25, 2013

You only live 3 times. No such thing as YOLO, since Jesus has risen.

John 20:19-31 HOPE FOR THE HOPELESS - the resurrection 19 On the evening of that first day of the week, when the disciples were together, with the doors locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” 20 After he said this, he showed them his ...read more

Scripture: John 20:19-31

Denomination: Lutheran

Beauty In The Eye Of The Beholder

Contributed by Michael Buckingham on Jul 8, 2011

There is beauty in God and His works, all that He does is wonderful, if God gives you a seeing eye, your view on life will be completely different. Read about it here!

Beauty in The Eye of The Beholder The saying, “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” is reported to have first appeared in 3rd century Greek writings, and has found its way into many famous writings throughout history, including the writings of Shakespeare. The concept of the phrase ...read more

Scripture: Philippians 4:4

Denomination: Baptist

Proverbs: The Power Of Your Words Series

Contributed by C Jordan on May 15, 2011

Proverbs tells us that the power of life and death is in our tongue. That tells us that our words are powerful, and we need to use that power wisely.

PROVERBS #3: THE POWER OF YOUR WORDS OPENING SCRIPTURE: “Getting wisdom is the most important thing you can do!” (Proverbs 4:7a, NLT). • In May we are going on a month long journey through the Book of Proverbs. THE BIG IDEA: Proverbs tells us that the power of life and death is in our tongue. ...read more

Denomination: *other

In Christ, I Am...light In The Darkness Series

Contributed by Vic Folkert on Aug 17, 2018

Shine the light of Christ on our own darkness, and the darkness of the world. Then, shine as a light in the world.

IN CHRIST, I AM…LIGHT IN THE DARKNESS—Ephesians 5:1-20 (Series on Ephesians: In Christ, I Am…) Read the sermon title from the card. There is a lot of darkness in the world. The media bombards us with stories of injustice, oppression, and corruption. We see people who are caught in a web of sin, ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 5:1-20

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

A Message For 9-11 Sunday

Contributed by Jonathan Spurlock on Sep 16, 2021

Bad things have happened to people many times over the years. There were some people who spoke to Jesus about a recent event. His reply wasn't something they expected to hear.

Based on a sermon preached at First Baptist Church, Chamois, MO on 9-12-2021. This is not an exact transcription. Introduction: The question has been asked many times before: Where were you on 9-11, 2001? I was a substitute school teacher that day. During the second period, I think, the ...read more

Scripture: Luke 13:1-5

Denomination: Baptist

Mockery Of Roman Soldiers Series

Contributed by John Lowe on Mar 13, 2020

Following Pilates sentencing Jesus to a horrible death by crucifixion the soldiers could do anything they wanted to do to our Lord; they mocked Him and beat Him mercilessly. Remember, before this He was scourged (whipped).

HARMONY OF THE GOSPELS (34) Mockery of Roman Soldiers Scripture: Matthew 27:27-30 (focal passage); Mark 15:16-19 Tom Lowe 3/18/2008 Following Pilates sentencing Jesus to a horrible death by crucifixion the soldiers could do anything they wanted to do to our Lord; they mocked Him and beat ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 27:27-30, Mark 15:16-19

Denomination: Baptist