Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

Thanksgiving

Contributed by Stephen Sheane on Oct 9, 2018

The Invitation, Motivation and Celebration of Thanksgiving

THANKSGIVING Have you ever met someone who just seemed impossible to please. A large dog walks into a butcher shop carrying a purse in its mouth. He puts the purse down and sits in front of the meat case. "What is it, boy?" the butcher jokingly asks. "Want to buy some meat?" "Woof!" barks the dog. ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 100:1-5

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Loyalty

Contributed by Dennis King on Jul 7, 2018

This is a Bible Study Lesson on loyalty as it relates to us, our country, and our God.

Let's dip into God's Word for a few, brief, verses. (pick at least three to read to your class) Judges 8:35, They also failed to show any loyalty to the family of Jerub-Baal (that is, Gideon) in spite of all the good things he had done for them. 1 Samuel 22:14, Ahimelek answered the king, ...read more

Scripture: John 14:15, Psalm 78:37

Denomination: Baptist

Discipleship - The Normal Christian Life! Series

Contributed by Gordon Curley on May 14, 2018

Jesus calls Simon, James & John to Follow Him – Luke chapter 5 verses 1-11 – Sermon by Gordon Curley PowerPoint slides to accompany this talk are available on request – email: gcurley@gcurley.info

SERMON OUTLINE: • Disciples love to hear the Word of God taught (vs 1-3) • Disciples obey Jesus even when it doesn’t make sense (vs 4-7) • Disciples are aware of their own sinfulness (vs 8-10a) • Disciples are fishers of people (vs 10b) • Disciples are willing to forsake all and follow Christ (vs ...read more

Scripture: Luke 5:1-11

Denomination: Brethren

Redemptive Relationship Series

Contributed by C. Philip Green on May 18, 2018

Trust Christ with your life and let Him set you free forever from guilt and sin.

I enjoy reading Mikey’s Funnies at times. It is a humorous, daily, blog post from Mike Atkinson. Some time ago, he posted this: If you can start the day without caffeine; if you can get going without pep pills; if you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains; if you can resist complaining ...read more

Scripture: Hebrews 9:11-15

Denomination: Evangelical Free

The Shepherd's Promise

Contributed by Dean Rhine on Jun 19, 2018

God promises to be with us

Psalm 23 - Part 4 - 2/5/11 Turn with me this morning to Psalm 23. If you open your bible right in the middle, you probably will land somewhere in the Psalms or just a little right of the Psalms. We are going to continue on looking at this Psalm that has been a source of comfort and blessing to ...read more

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

True Religion Series

Contributed by David Welch on Jun 21, 2018

Message 13 in our exposition of James. This message focuses on three characteristics of a true follower of Jesus Christ.

Chico Alliance Church Pastor David Welch “True Religion” This is our thirteenth excursion in front of God’s faith-exposing mirror. James’ letter provides pointed instruction evaluating the true nature of our faith. James’ mirror exposes the reality of faith by showing us the character of true ...read more

Scripture: 1 Peter 1:17-19

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Loamy Hearts

Contributed by Greg Yort on Apr 8, 2018

As a church and as a Christian, it is our job to sow seeds…to preach, teach and witness. It is God’s job to regenerate hearts, save, and mature.

Introduction Is anyone here do much gardening? What is the dirty secret among successful gardeners? Loamy soil! Every gardener quickly learns that good soil is vital for a healthy, productive garden. Good soil means it has nutrients to feed the plants and a texture that holds water long enough for ...read more

Scripture: Luke 8:4-8

Denomination: Church Of God

The Gift That Never Stops

Contributed by Mark Opperman on Jan 15, 2014

There is a thirst in every heart that can only be satisfied by our Creator. This is seen in John's account of the woman at the well. Like her, we must encounter Jesus in order to satisfy the spiritual thirst we have.

THE GIFT THAT NEVER STOPS John 4:1-18 The Pharisees heard that Jesus was gaining and baptizing more disciples than John, 2 although in fact it was not Jesus who baptized, but his disciples. 3 When the Lord learned of this, he left Judea and went back once more to Galilee. 4 Now he had to go ...read more

Scripture: John 4:1-18

Denomination: Assembly Of God

The Sinner’s Friend Series

Contributed by Bob Hostetler on Jan 21, 2014

Jesus loves the lowly, broken, and sinful. A special sermon contribution from the SON OF GOD sermon packet for pastors, inspired by the SON OF GOD movie from Mark Burnett and distributed by 20th Century Fox.

I’d like to take a short quiz here today. Don’t worry, there are no wrong answers. I’d just like to poll this group to see who had childhoods like mine. For example, by a show of hands, how many of us here have actually cried over spilled milk? Some of us are too old to ...read more

Scripture: Luke 18:9-14

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

You Can Always Go Home (Luke 15:11-24)

Contributed by Pastor Jeff Hughes on Jan 22, 2014

A sermon on the Prodigal Son, and how we can always go home to Jesus when we stray from the faith.

You Can Always Go Home (Luke 15:11-24) Ernest Hemingway wrote a story about a father and his teenage son. In the story, the relationship had become somewhat strained, and the teenage son ran away from home. His father began a journey in search of that rebellious son. Finally, in Madrid, Spain, ...read more

Scripture: Luke 15:11-24

Denomination: Bible Church

Seperate, But Certainly Not Equal

Contributed by Mark Weinstein on Feb 4, 2014

Keeping ourselves as Christians pure against distractions to God's way

Last Sunday, televised on CBS, was the 56th Annual Grammy Awards. Grammy is, just in case you wondered, short for the complete name, gramophone, the invention that first allowed recorded music to be stored and replayed. Each year, executives in the music industry nominate and select recipients ...read more

Scripture: Leviticus 12:1-8

Denomination: Congregational

The Leader & Organisation Series

Contributed by Chris Appleby on Feb 20, 2015

Nehemiah prays before acting, does his research, then Nehemiah identifies himself with the people of Jerusalem, and so the leaders commit themselves to the common good

The stage is set. The actors are all in place. Nehemiah has finally come to the moment he’s been working towards as he’s prayed and fasted over the previous days or weeks. Nehemiah enters, stage right, with the jug of wine for the king, as he does every day. But unlike every other day ...read more

Scripture: Nehemiah 2:1-20

Denomination: Anglican

Cricket...cricket....

Contributed by Suresh Manoharan on Mar 25, 2015

Gleaning some spiritual lessons from the game of Cricket at a time, Cricket World Cup tourney 2015 in Australia has reached its climactic stage!!!

CRICKET, CRICKET… Nothing quite like the sweet sound of the willow striking leather …more so if the Cricket World cup is on. As the game of Cricket originated in the ole English village greens there are some xenophobic ...read more

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 12:28-30

Denomination: *other

Judging The Invisible People Series

Contributed by Spencer Miller on Jun 27, 2013

The plight of the homeless in America should be the concern of everyone of us, we should never look down on them as if they don't exist.

Introduction I have a burden for the homeless, my heart goes out to them every time I see someone roaming the dangerous streets of Houston, Texas. The Evangelist Malcolm Scott, Jr. once wrote that, “There is nothing worse then a burden less preacher” and cannot help but agree with him. ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 7:1-5

Denomination: Baptist

A Blameless Life Series

Contributed by Steve Shepherd on Jul 11, 2013

How to live a blameless life 1- Focus on the Lord 2- Have nothing to do with evil 3- Cast away pride

INTRO.- ILL.- As a father came home from his work he saw his little daughter who had been playing in the mud. He said to her, “My, you’re pretty dirty.” In her childish way she replied, “Yes, I know daddy, but I’m prettier clean.” I think we’re all ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 101:1-8

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ