Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

Hearts On Fire

Contributed by Greg Burcham on Jun 25, 2016

This sermon deals with the self inflicted damage we do to our spiritual hearts and God's prescription for healing.

Hearts On Fire, Luke 24:32 Luke 24:32 “And they said to one another, did not our hearts burn within us while He talked with us on the road, and while he opened the scriptures to us.” Did you know that the word “heart” appears in the King James Bible 830 times? Only the ...read more

Scripture: Luke 24:32

Denomination: Baptist

The Great Disappearance

Contributed by John Gaston on Jul 23, 2014

We live in a time just before God's judgment on a corrupted world. So did Enoch. He got his own personal rapture; so can you. Four characteristics made him a candidate for that glorious event the same will qualify us too!

THE GREAT DISAPPEARANCE Gen. 5:21-24 INTRODUCTION A. HUMOR: HER AGE 1. A nurse was writing down necessary information about a new patient, in preparation for her physical examination. Nurse: "How old are you, Mrs. Smith?" 2. Patient: "None of your business." Nurse: "But the doctor must know your ...read more

Scripture: Genesis 5:21-24

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Walking Differently Because Of Our Calling Series

Contributed by Danny Davis on Feb 8, 2014

We are called of God and because of that calling we walk differently than the rest of the world.

Introduction This morning we talked about God’s expectation for us to WALK WORTHY OF OUR CALLING. Through the writings of Paul to the church at Ephesus we are given a glimpse of how part of that calling is walking in unity with our brothers and sisters in Christ; and the exercise of our ...read more

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Is There Evidence Of Our First Love?

Contributed by Wade Martin Hughes, Sr on Apr 10, 2021

We face great dangers when our first love grows dim. We shall stand at the bema seat of God. Guard your passion and zeal to be ready for the imminent return of Jesus Christ.

IS THERE EVIDENCE OF OUR FIRST LOVE? By Wade Martin Hughes, Sr. Kyfingers@aol.com (Two part) Text: Matthew 24:44 Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh. WE SO TEACH A GOD OF LOVE, GRACE AND MERCY THAT WE TEND TO BYPASS THE JUDGMENT SEAT OF ...read more

Scripture: Revelation 2:4, Jeremiah 20:9

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Keys To Happiness

Contributed by I. Grant Spong on Jan 29, 2017

The Beatitudes reveal the best keys to happiness.

Intro How can we find true happiness? Is it found in heavenly thoughts? Goal Let us understand where true happiness comes from. Sermon Plan We will look at the beatitudes in Matthew 5:1-12, keys to happiness. One day as he saw the crowds gathering, Jesus went up on the mountainside and sat ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 5:1-12

Denomination: Baptist

Guard Your Heart

Contributed by Bart Leger on Nov 20, 2002

Be careful what you allow into your mind.

Proverbs 4:23-27 Guard Your Heart How many of you love to receive advice? Oh, isn’t advice great? It’s cool as cornbread. That is as long as you’re the one giving it. The great thing about advice is it’s free to give out. You can give out all you want to, spread it all around, and it doesn’t cost ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 4:23-27

Denomination: Independent/Bible

Stewardship: Calling Of Samuel Series

Contributed by Peter Loughman on Oct 25, 2006

Stewardship sermon....kind of, sort of. God calls us to both ministry and stewardship - but expects obedience First joke is not funny, but is a set up for later

A certain Jewish couple, expecting to the their first child, argued hotly about what name should be given to their little boy. This went on for weeks. Finally, exhausted, they asked their rabbi to intervene. The exasperated mom-to-be said, "I want to name my child after my father, but my husband ...read more

Scripture: 1 Samuel 3:1-21

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Jesus Is Risen -- No Foolin'!

Contributed by Perry Greene on Mar 27, 2018

The resurrection is not hoax or an April Fool's Day joke, Jesus is alive. There is power in an eyewitness. This is especially true with Mary Magdalene in what she saw and heard at Jesus' tomb.

1. No one knows the origin of April Fool’s Day but it has been around for centuries. Some of the most famous April Fool’s Day Pranks are: • The Great Moon Hoax is the first big media trick. The New York Sun prints an article in 1835 claiming that astronomers have discovered life on the moon. More ...read more

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Giving Thanks To God Series

Contributed by Steve Shepherd on Nov 13, 2012

Some thoughts about thanksgiving from God’s Word. 1- In a list of sins ingratitude is a big one 2- In the presence of all people we must give thanks 3- In a world of impurity there must be thanksgiving 4- In the midst of asking we must give thanks

INTRO.- ILL.- It was on Thanksgiving many years ago that actress Helen Hayes cooked her first turkey. Before serving it she announced to her husband, Charles MacArthur, and their son James: “Now I know this is the first turkey I’ve ever cooked. If it isn’t right, I don’t want anybody to say a ...read more

Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

The Outsiders

Contributed by Derrick Tuper on Oct 20, 2011

Are we mindful of how we come across to unbelievers? Are we aware of how the unchurched look at those who call themselves Christians? It would serve us well to gain a better understanding about how important it is to present ourselves in the right way.

THE OUTSIDERS INTRODUCTION: We come to church and we’re mostly surrounded by “insiders” people who are Christians like us but how much consideration do we give to those who are still outside? Are we mindful of how we come across to unbelievers? Do we care how we present ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 4:5-6

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

The Sleeping Church Series

Contributed by Ajai Prakash on Oct 7, 2014

In the past 50 odd years we have seen moral compromise in the body of Christ and our nation. Put another way, when did the church fall asleep? What caused the church to fall asleep? Are we to remain sleeping or wake up the sleeping giant? I don't have ...

Opening illustration: Where was the church when prayer was taken out of schools in 1962? Or when abortion was legalized in 1973? Or when same-sex marriage started to gain momentum to the point that Christian businesses are persecuted for refusing to bake a wedding cake for a gay couple? Put ...read more

Scripture: Judges 16:10-21

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Washed Clean

Contributed by Simon Rundell on Jul 11, 2001

Children’s Assemby / Sermon using a really clever piece of magic/basic science to illustrate the dirtiness of sin and the washing clean of Christ

Washed Clean based on an idea by Daniel Henderson Tools: 2 Clear Glass Bowls 1 small bottle of Iodine 1 bottle of Film Fixer 1 Purificator or Handkerchief Preparation: Fill the two bowls with approximately 1 litre of water, in one bowl have approximately 150-200mls of fixer in the bottom [adding ...read more

Scripture: John 3:16

Denomination: Episcopal/Anglican

A Great Lesson:waiting/Patience #1 Series

Contributed by Wade Martin Hughes, Sr on Mar 5, 2003

Patience and Waiting are dirty words today in the church because it is associated with troubles and tribulations. God wants His people to have patience and be entire.

#1 THE GREAT LESSON? WAITING/ PATIENECE This is part #1 By Wade Martin Hughes, Sr, Kyfingers@aol.com 1. Waiting and Patience -- the dirty words? ; 2. Habakkuk’s Waiting Room; 3. Danger of waiting and spiritual rust; 4. The five levels of waiting; 5. Waiting with Joy and gladness 6. Long ...read more

Scripture: Isaiah 40:31, 2 Corinthians 12:8-9

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Hard Work

Contributed by Bala Samson on Jan 2, 2015

Life would not always be hunky-dory, we got to roll up our sleeves and be ready to dirty our fingers! Are you there?

Hard work! Ruth 2:7”She said, 'Please let me glean and gather among the sheaves after the reapers.' So she came, and she has continued from early morning until now, except for a short rest.” Friend, may be you are poised, smart, educated, technically qualified, charming and ...read more

Scripture: Ruth 2:1-7

Denomination: Pentecostal

From Hearing To Holy Living: When The Word Gets Its Hands Dirty - James 1:22 Series

Contributed by Dean Courtier on Jan 30, 2026

There is a dangerous place to live spiritually—and it’s not rebellion, atheism, or persecution. It’s comfort. It’s familiarity. It’s sitting under the Word of God week after week, nodding politely, agreeing inwardly… and then walking out unchanged.

From Hearing to Holy Living: When the Word Gets Its Hands Dirty - James 1:22 Introduction: The Most Dangerous Place in Church Church, there is a dangerous place to live spiritually—and it’s not rebellion, atheism, or persecution. It’s comfort. It’s familiarity. It’s sitting under the Word of God ...read more

Scripture: James 1:22, Matthew 7:24-27, Psalm 119:105, John 14:15, James 2:17, Ephesians 2:8-9, 2 Corinthians 5:17  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Pentecostal