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Summary: God’s kind of love … agape … doesn’t follow, it leads by example. It’s a verb. It acts. It leads our hearts. And it changes lives. It changes the life of the person acting in love and it changes the life of the person receiving the love.

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Ever get caught in the “if only” trap? You probably have … probably caught in it even now … and don’t even realize it. The “if only” trap works like this:

“If only they would rise off the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher …”

“If only they wouldn’t leave their dirty socks lying around …”

“If only they wouldn’t hog the remote control …”

“If only they wouldn’t snore …”

“If only … if only …” … and then what? You’d be happy? If they would just listen, you wouldn’t have to keep nagging them and repeating yourself? If they would just do what you tell them to do, the world would be a better and much more happier place, am I right?

How’s that working out for you? Thirty, forty, fifty years later and you’re still “explaining,” they’re still not listening, and they still leave their socks lying around, leave dirty dishes in the sink, and hog the remote control.

Guess what? That person that you’re trying to change? Yeah … they’ve got their own “if you would only …” list too. And so, everyone is waiting on everyone else to change, to get with the program, and nobody is changing and nobody is happy.

Our society is caught in the “if only” trap too. Everybody is pointing fingers at everyone else and crying, “If only they would listen, if only they would see things MY way, if only they would do what WE tell them to do, boy, this world would a whole lot better place.” The result is a divided country, everybody pointing at and accusing each other, everyone stuck in their own little bubble or echo chamber waiting for everyone else to change, and it feels like everybody’s at war and nobody is happy.

But we, my brothers and sisters, we have the solution to the “if only” trap … and that key is “here, let me.” [Read 1st Thessalonians 2:8-12.]

What is our “natural” or automatic reaction in times of crisis? We tend to circle the wagons, don’t we? Our hearts are hardened by a constant barrage of cynicism and despair. It’s time to take of myself … the rest of you are on your own. Me, I’m gonna lock the door and hunker down. See you on the other side of all this … if there is another side of this, amen?

1st Thessalonians is the Apostle Paul’s first letter to the newly formed Christian community in Thessalonica. Paul had shared the gospel with them during an earlier trip, which they accepted and were now being made to suffer for it. Aware of their persecution and struggle to hold on to their faith, Paul is suggesting that they resist their urge to “circle the wagons” and, instead, do just the opposite. He asks the community in Thessalonica to be more loving and compassionate toward one another and to everyone else around them, to resist the urge to isolate or protect themselves by engaging in self-less service … which would sound as counterintuitive to them then as it does to us today, amen?

Paul wasn’t asking them to do anything that he wasn’t willing to do himself. In fact, he is calling upon them to follow his example. Apparently Paul wasn’t initially accepted the first time he visited Thessalonica but we see him praying and giving thanks to God for them and for the chance to come and serve them. “We always give thanks to God for all of you and mention you in our prayers,” he writes at the beginning of his letter, “constantly remembering before our God and Father your work of faith and labor of love and steadfastness of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ” (1st Thessalonians 1:2).

“So deeply do we care for you,” says Paul, “that we are determined to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves” (1st Thessalonians 2:8). Think about what he just said. They were not only determined to come to Thessalonica to preach and share the gospel with them but to share of themselves, to put themselves out for them. In fact, as Paul points out, he refused to be a burden upon the community by paying his own way by sewing tents … by hand. Tough work, amen? “You remember our labor and toil, brothers and sisters; we worked night and day, so that we might not burden any of you while we proclaimed to you the gospel of God” (v. 9; emphasis mine). And though they weren’t warmly received the first time around, Paul says that they “dealt with each one of you like a father with his children, urging and encouraging you and pleading that you lead a life worthy of God, who calls you into His own kingdom and glory” (v. 11-12).

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