Contributed by Davon Huss on May 26, 2008
Advice and instructions taken from actual military sources. Some of these guys must have had a sense of humor.
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend." --U.S. Marine Corps
"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Karl Ingersoll on Jun 19, 2008
It was one of the worst days of my life: The washing machine broke down, the telephone kept ringing, my head ached, and the mail carrier brought a bill I had no money to pay.
Almost to the breaking point, I lifted my one-year-old into his high chair, leaned my head against the tray, and began to
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Methodist
Contributed by Don Hawks on Aug 2, 2008
LAST LECTURE
You may have heard about the death of 47 year old Carnegie Mellon University computer-science professor Randy Pausch last week from pancreatic cancer. Pausch was most famous for his "Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams" speech made last fall just after he learned he had months to
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Methodist
based on 1 rating
| 4,260 views
WHAT'S THAT NOISE?
I read a humorous story about a man who strolled out of a hardware store with a smile on his face and a brand-new chainsaw in his hands. He was told it could cut down five big oak trees in an hour. Twenty-four hours later, however, his smile was gone. Frustrated, he was back at
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Baptist
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Feb 15, 2010
Punxsutawney Phil is a groundhog that comes out of his burrow on Gobbler’s Knob, Pennsylvania, each February 2 to predict the weather. According to legend, if Phil sees his shadow, there will be 6 more weeks of cold weather. If he doesn’t see his shadow, spring will come early.
This is all humbug
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Independent/Bible
Contributed by Brian Harvison on Apr 6, 2008
Ever seen a picture of a platypus?
Strand creature these things are
They live on the east coast of Australia
The bizarre appearance of this mammal baffled European naturalists when they first encountered it, with some considering it an elaborate fraud
First off it is a mammal ¡V that lays eggs
It
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Baptist
Contributed by Bobby Scobey on Sep 11, 2008
Myron
Do you need encouragement on a smaller scale for a person with lesser abilities? Kenneth Dodge, San Leandro, California:
In a small town in the Midwest where I spent six years of my early youth, there lived a mentally retarded adult named Myron. It was during depression years and there was
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Victor Yap on Mar 20, 2003
based on 39 ratings
| 2,840 views
It’s been said that the six most important words in communications and human relations are “I admit that I was wrong.?Counting down, the five most important words are “You did a great job.?The four most important words are “What do you think??The three most important word are “May I help??The two
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Independent/Bible
Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 19, 2007
Collegiate Online 43% of college students go online at least 10 hours a week, while 31% spend 6 to 10 hours a week online and 19% visit the Web for 3 to 5 hours a week, finds a recent Experience study. By contrast, just 17% watch TV more than 10 hours a week, and a mere 1% spend 10 hours a week
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THAT'S ALL I WANT
Here, I am prompted to share a humorous yet insightful Church story involving a Sunday school girl. Given the task of reciting the first verse of Psalm 23 before a huge Church crowd (including her anxious parents), this girl is said to have uttered unwittingly out of nervousness
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*other
Contributed by Scott Jensen on Jan 2, 2009
The Oakland police force recently unveiled its first lowrider police car. The vehicle has the standard logo, lights and siren, but also includes chrome wheels, hydraulic lift, and a 500-watt sound system. The car was put on the force to help officers build better relationship with inner-city
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Lutheran
Contributed by Matthew Rogers on Mar 11, 2002
based on 25 ratings
| 6,258 views
GIVING BLOOD
Priscilla Larson writes, “My brother-in-law, who is a minister, responded to a Red Cross appeal for blood donations. When he didn’t come home by the time his young son expected him, the boy asked his mother, ‘Is Dad going around visiting all the sick people?’ His mother replied, ‘He’s
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Rodelio Mallari on Dec 12, 2010
based on 1 rating
| 3,855 views
HARDSHIP AND DISCIPLINE
No professional football team that plays its home games in a domed stadium with artificial turf has ever won the Super Bowl.
While a climate-controlled stadium protects players (and fans) from the misery of sleet, snow, mud, heat, and wind, players who brave the
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*other
Contributed by Scott Jensen on Mar 28, 2012
WHAT I WOULDN'T GIVE...
When Oliver Wendell Holmes was still on the U.S. Supreme Court, he and Justice Louis Brandeis took walks every afternoon. On one of these occasions Holmes, then ninety-two, paused to gaze in frank admiration at a beautiful young girl who passed them. He even turned to look
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Lutheran
Contributed by Scott Jensen on Oct 8, 2008
A Baptist congregation installed a new full immersion baptistery in the sanctuary as part of an extensive remodeling project. But the county building inspector wouldn’t okay its’ installation. “I can’t,” he said, “unless it has a separate septic tank.”
The trusties couldn’t understand why a
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Lutheran
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on May 7, 2012
HORSE SENSE
I like horses okay, but I am not a horse-person. But for much of history, horses were crucial. As a result, we have developed a lot of idioms involving horses.
"Many terms and phrases in the English language harken back to a time not so long ago when horses were of extreme
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Independent/Bible
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