Contributed by Merv Budd on Nov 1, 2005
based on 2 ratings
| 1,785 views
You may have heard of the story of the old lumberman who came into a store and said he’d like to buy a chainsaw because he had heard that they were quicker and easier for cutting down trees than his old one man saw. So he comes back a few days later and says the saw’s broken he wanted a
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 8, 2005
based on 27 ratings
| 4,331 views
A man dies and goes to heaven. Of course, St. Peter meets him at the pearly gates. St. Peter says, "Here’s how it works. You need 100 points to make it into heaven. You tell me all the good things you’ve done, and I give you a certain number of points for each item, depending on how good it was.
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based on 4 ratings
| 3,424 views
"To make it possible for everyone to attend worship next Sunday, we are having a special "No Excuses" Sunday:
• "Beds will be placed in the aisles for all those who say, "Sunday is the only day I’m able to sleep in late."
• "Eye drops will be provided for all those who watch TV too late on
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 31, 2008
based on 9 ratings
| 2,776 views
HE DIED FOR EVERYONE--INCLUDING ME
The famed congregational preacher, Dwight L. Moody, once said,
"The great trouble is that people take everything in general, and do not take it to themselves. Suppose a man should say to me, 'Moody, there was a man in Europe who died last week, and left five
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 16, 2003
based on 6 ratings
| 2,703 views
Matthew was playing in the yard. His grandmother came to the door to check on him and heard him say, "Hell." She was shocked and scolded him, Matthew, we do not use that word. Who did you hear say that?" His reply was, "Rick" (His preacher’s name) "When did he say that?",
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Contributed by Guy Mcgraw on May 25, 2001
based on 71 ratings
| 2,402 views
Counterfit bills are never made in odd denominations($3 or $8 or $12) but are meant to imitate the real thing. At first glance they seem real, you may have passed them along without knowing it. But there is always something bogus about them, some blur or omition, something that doesn’t exactly
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 19, 2007
Teen Girls: Despite MySpace, chatting on IM or surfing iTunes, 12- to-14-year-old girls are still most deeply motivated by TV. 65% say they’re influenced by a TV show or network, and are more likely to multi-task. More than half report regularly instant-messaging; about two-thirds read and write
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Contributed by Timothy Dolan on Jan 5, 2008
Creation was good! In a scene of the television show ‘Joan of Arcadia’(which is not always theologically correct by the way) Joan asks God to prove that He is God. He asks Joan, “now.. how might I do that?” She says, “do a miracle or something.” God says, “what about that,” as He points to a
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Jul 20, 2009
Two friends run into each other while walking their dogs. One suggests lunch. The other says, "They won’t let us in a restaurant with pets."
Undeterred, the first guy and his German shepherd head into the restaurant. The maître d’ stops them, saying, "Sir, you can’t bring your dog in here."
"But
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 12, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 1,118 views
"Always remember there are two types of people in the world. Those who come into a room and say, Well, here I am and
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Contributed by Steve Ely on Oct 1, 2008
The Yugo and the Rolls-Royce
A man was driving his Yugo when he pulled up next to a Rolls-Royce at a stoplight. The driver of the Yugo rolled down his window and shouted to the driver of the Rolls, "Hey, that’s a nice car. Do you have a phone in your Rolls? I’ve got a phone in my Yugo!" The driver
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
based on 1 rating
| 517 views
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ‘I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.’
The driver says, ‘Oh my, officer I had it on cruise control at 60; perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.’
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says, ‘Now don’t be silly dear, you
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Paul Wallace on Feb 21, 2008
Colorado Rockies (USA Today article 6-1-2006)
By the time the sun rose Dec. 4, 2004, Rockies management had vowed the direction of the organization would change. Pitcher Denny Neagle had been charged with soliciting a prostitute, another embarrassment for a franchise that had not been competitive
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
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