Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 22, 2003
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TOP 10 THINGS TO DO INSIDE A WHALE
10) “Can you hear me now?”
9) Pray … he’s bulemic
8) Bonfire and fish fry!
7) Open a sushi bar
6) "Consider it pure joy"
5) Floss … the whale
4) Finally get motivated to read Moby Dick
3) Listen to tapes of your preacher’s old
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Contributed by Bobby Mcdaniel on Feb 15, 2004
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A British publication once offered a prize for the best definition of a friend. Among the thousands of answers received were the following:
"One who multiplies joys, divides grief, and whose honesty is inviolable."
"One who understands our silence."
"A volume of sympathy bound in cloth."
"A watch
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based on 2 ratings
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The clock of life is wound but once, And no man has the power To tell just when the hands will stop. At late or early hour. To lose one’s wealth is sad indeed. To lose one’s health is more. To lose one’s soul is such a loss that no man can restore. Thirty-nine people died while you read this
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Mike Rexroat on Aug 5, 2007
Aren’t we like that sometimes? We have so much that when we lose something it isn’t that big of a deal? I read this week about an actual Ebay listing for a 1962 Ford Thunderbird Convertible...it had 5,487 original miles...in perfect showroom condition. A man called about it and he asked the
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by David Moore on Mar 21, 2008
To point out how lonely people can be, Charles Swindoll mentioned an ad in a Kansas newspaper. It read, “I will listen to you talk for 30 minutes without comment for $5.00.” Swindoll said, “Sounds like a hoax, doesn’t it? But the person was serious. Did anybody call? You bet. It wasn’t long before
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 10, 2008
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SIR HENRY TAYLOR IS QUOTED AS SAYING, "HE WHO GIVES WHAT HE WOULD AS READILY THROW AWAY, GIVES WITHOUT GENEROSITY; FOR THE ESSENCE OF GENEROSITY IS IN SELF-SACRIFICE." I RECENTLY READ SOMEWHERE THAT THE AVERAGE BABY BOOMER GIVES TO THE CHURCH ABOUT WHAT HE WOULD SPEND ON A MOVIE TICKET. $7 IS NOT
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Contributed by Dale Pilgrim on Mar 25, 2009
AD FOR LISTENING
To point out how lonely people can be, Charles Swindoll mentioned an ad in a Kansas newspaper. It read, "I will listen to you talk for 30 minutes without comment for $5.00." Swindoll said, "Sounds like a hoax, doesn’t it? But the person was serious. Did anybody call? You bet. It
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Denomination:
Salvation Army
Contributed by Brian La Croix on Apr 27, 2009
A priest and pastor from the local parishes are standing by the side of the road holding up a sign that reads, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it’s too late!"
"Leave us alone you religious nuts!" yelled the first driver as he sped by.
From around the curve they heard
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Aug 10, 2009
A recent Time article (July 09) read:
"Have economic times gotten so bad that some of the dead are going unburied? Several large counties across the country are experiencing unprecedented increases in the number of unclaimed deceased - not only because the dead people could not be identified, were
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Donnie Martin on Mar 21, 2011
THE BEST DEFINITION OF A FRIEND
A British publication once offered a prize for the best definition of a friend. Among the thousands of answers received were the following:
"One who multiplies joys, divides grief, and whose honesty is inviolable."
"One who understands our silence."
"A volume
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Jerry Cosper on Mar 7, 2012
HOT AIR
When we were building this sanctuary we were discussing whether to put paper towel dispensers in the new rest rooms or those hot-air hand dryers. I strongly recommended the paper towel dispensers because of a story I heard about at another church. They installed the hot-air hand dryers.
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Mark Schaeufele on Mar 30, 2012
THE CROSS OF VICTORY
John Stott is his book The Cross of Christ, wrote, "It is impossible to read the New Testament with being impressed by the atmosphere of joyful confidence which pervades it, and which stands out in relief against the rather jejune (superficial) religion that often passes for
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Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Pat Cook on Feb 7, 2006
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Let me tell you about C.S.Lewis, the author of the Chronicles of Narnia. In 1952 he had been writing to one of his fans an American woman named Joy Gresham, a recent convert to Christianity, and who had been a Communist Jew. She was also going through a hard divorce. He autographed her copy of his
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Bob Soulliere on Feb 3, 2007
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In a far country lived a band of minstrels who traveled from town to town presenting music to make a living. They had not been doing well. Times were hard; there was little money for common folk to come to hear the minstrels, even though their fee was small. Attendance had been falling off, so
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Tim Harlow on May 13, 2009
MARRIAGE: SLEEPING ON THE HIDE-A-BED
Doug and Sylvia Whitt were on their honeymoon, and it was late, after the wedding and all this stuff and they went into the room. It was this beautiful room, and it had all the amenities. They realized there was no bed there. They were like "this is kind of
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
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