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In Sermon Illustrations: "Preacher Jokes" showing 581-600 of 1,735

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  • Cured  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on May 11, 2002
    based on 7 ratings
     | 4,094 views

    CURED A woman went to her doctor’s office. She was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming and ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she explained. He had her sit down and relax in ...read more

  • Golf Beginner  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 12, 2003
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,211 views

    *Golf Beginner* A retiree was given a set of golf clubs by his co-workers. Thinking he’d try the game, he asked the local pro for lessons, explaining that he knew nothing whatever of the game. The pro showed him the stance and swing, then said "Just hit the ball toward the flag on the first ...read more

  • During One Of His Political Campaigns, A ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,361 views

    During one of his political campaigns, a delegation called on Theodore Roosevelt at his home in Oyster Bay, Long Island. The President met them with his coat off and his sleeves rolled up. "Ah, gentlemen," he said, "come down to the barn and we will talk while I do some work." At the barn, ...read more

  • The General Took His Stand

    Contributed by Bruce Howell on Jan 23, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,095 views

    Illus.: “The General Took His Stand” Fredrick the Great of Germany, was a scoffer, but his great general, Von Zealand, was a devout Christian. One day at a gathering, the king was making coarse jokes about Jesus and the whole palace was ringing with laughter. Von Zealand arose stiffly and said, ...read more

  • The General Took His Stand  PRO

    Contributed by Bruce Howell on Jan 23, 2008
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,363 views

    Illus.: “The General Took His Stand” Fredrick the Great of Germany, was a scoffer, but his great general, Von Zealand, was a devout Christian. One day at a gathering, the king was making coarse jokes about Jesus and the whole palace was ringing with laughter. Von Zealand arose stiffly and said, ...read more

  • Wailing And Laughing  PRO

    Contributed by Ovidiu Radulescu on May 26, 2009
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,351 views

    WAILING AND LAUGHING Now, you may realize that in those days in Middle-Eastern custom, people usually wailed loudly at funerals. I grew up in a Greek Orthodox country and until today the custom requires a loud and visible weep for the dead. Can you imagine how perplexed I was when I watched people ...read more

  • The Use Of God's Gifts

    Contributed by Sean Harder on Dec 9, 2009
     | 2,278 views

    THE USE OF GOD'S GIFTS How much did Jerry Jones, the owner of the Dallas Cowboys spend on the New Texas Stadium? 1.15 billion dollars. They joke that there is a hole in the top of the stadium so that God can watch his favorite team play. I’m not so sure Mr. Jones doesn’t believe that. We look at ...read more

  • Right Under His Nose  PRO

    Contributed by Derrick Tuper on Jun 11, 2010
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,876 views

    RIGHT UNDER HIS NOSE Sometimes we probably feel like the man whose grandchildren played a practical joke on him. Each afternoon, Grandpa would lie down for a nap. One day, the kids decided to put limburger cheese in his moustache. Quite soon afterward, he awoke sniffing. "This room stinks," he ...read more

  • The Public Scavenger

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 21, 2011
    based on 2 ratings
     | 1,966 views

    THE PUBLIC SCAVENGER A long time ago in Greece, some politicians decided to play a joke on a fellow politician in their group. They got him appointed to the post of Public Scavenger. It was a dirty, lowly post. But instead of being humiliated, the man decided he would show everybody what he could ...read more

  • Josh Mcdowell On Why People Refuse To ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 4, 2012
     | 3,435 views

    JOSH MCDOWELL ON WHY PEOPLE REFUSE TO BELIEVE Josh McDowell writes, “People refuse to believe that which they don’t want to believe, in spite of evidence. When explorers first went to Australia they found a mammal which laid eggs; spent some time in water, some on land; had a broad, flat tail, ...read more

  • Betting On Goliath  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Apr 2, 2013
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,453 views

    BETTING ON GOLIATH Death was handled differently in the ancient world. An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket containing a mummy. After examining it, he called the curator of a prestigious natural history museum. "I've just discovered a 3,000 year old ...read more

  • New Years Football Or Family?

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Dec 24, 2021
     | 2,498 views

    . As in many homes on New Year's Day, Janet and Nigel, a happily married couple, faced the annual conflict of which was more important: the football match on television, or the lunch itself. Hoping to keep the peace Nigel ate lunch with the rest of the family, and even lingered for some ...read more

  • Some Wines Are Weak And Have No Effect On You, ...

    Contributed by Fr Mund Cargill Thompson on Jan 13, 2010
     | 1,460 views

    "Some Wines are weak and have no effect on you, but the word of God is strong wine ... and gets you drunk." --Humbert of ...read more

  • The Memory Of Charles Haddon Spurgeon Has Been ...

    Contributed by John Shearhart on Mar 4, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,228 views

    “The memory of Charles Haddon Spurgeon has been cherished among evangelical Christians for over the past 100 years. Many Christian leaders consider him to be the greatest preacher England ever produced. He is commonly hailed as the "Prince of Preachers". Over 63 volumes of published sermons still ...read more

  • A Barber In A Small Town Was Busy Cutting Hair ...  PRO

    Contributed by Damien Spikereit on Oct 23, 2000
    based on 219 ratings
     | 21,269 views

    - A barber in a small town was busy cutting hair one day when the local cop walked in to get a haircut. And the barber was feeling a bit generous that day, so he said to the cop... "Since you do such a good job protecting us, and watching over us... today’s haircut is free." The cop said he ...read more

  • She Was Crazy. Everyone Knew It Because She Had ...  PRO

    Contributed by Jeff Strite on Apr 15, 2002
    based on 2 ratings
     | 1,498 views

    She was crazy. Everyone knew it because she had the habit of talking to herself in public and it was known that she believed she even talked to Jesus - and was spoken back to. A new preacher came to town and, hearing of the crazy woman, thought that he might be able to make her face reality. ...read more

  • She Was Crazy. Everyone Knew It Because She Had ...  PRO

    Contributed by Jeff Strite on Apr 18, 2002
    based on 72 ratings
     | 1,142 views

    She was crazy. Everyone knew it because she had the habit of talking to herself in public and it was known that she believed she even talked to Jesus - and was spoken back to. A new preacher came to town and, hearing of the crazy woman, thought that he might be able to make her face reality. ...read more

  • The Powerhouse

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 3,312 views

    “The memory of Charles Haddon Spurgeon has been cherished among evangelical Christians for over the past 100 years. Many Christian leaders consider him to be the greatest preacher England ever produced. He is commonly hailed as the "Prince of Preachers". Over 63 volumes of published sermons still ...read more

  • Because Of Strife

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 2,954 views

    That great ol’ preacher J.Vernon McGee writes, “I had an uncle who never came to know the Lord. My aunt used to weep and say, “Oh, he won’t listen” Do you know why? With her lived a sister, another aunt, and I used to go there sometimes on Sundays for dinner. Do you know what we had for dinner? ...read more

  • Does He Show Through?

    Contributed by Melvin Newland on Sep 3, 2009
     | 6,863 views

    DOES HE SHOW THROUGH? One Sunday as they drove home from church, a little girl turned to her mother & said, "Mommy, there’s something about the preacher’s message this morning that I don’t understand." The mother said, "Oh? What is it?" The little girl replied, "Well, he said that God is ...read more

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