Contributed by Larry Wilson on Oct 7, 2011
based on 1 rating
| 5,262 views
DEACONS AND LIGHTS
In our church, we have someone that does the maintenance and replaces light bulbs and things like that. They do not want their pastor to do this for two good reasons:
1) I know very little about maintenance, and my church knows that I know very little.
2) They don't want the
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Denomination:
Baptist
based on 7 ratings
| 3,167 views
Humor Illustration: CHRISTIAN FOOTBALL!!
Quarterback Sneak - Church members quietly leaving during the invitation.
Draw Play - What many children do with the bulletin during worship.
Half-time - The period between Sunday school and worship when many choose to leave.
Benchwarmer - Those who do
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Joel Vicente on Feb 14, 2005
based on 13 ratings
| 15,019 views
Illustrate Humor: WHAT MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME
My mother taught me RELIGION: When I spilled grape juice on the carpet, she instructed, "You better pray the stain will come out of the carpet."
My mother taught me LOGIC: From her decisive words, "Because I said so, that’s why."
My mother taught me
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Robert Garrett on May 29, 2005
based on 14 ratings
| 2,772 views
“BUY ME OUT”
A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law.
"I love my daughter, and now I welcome you into the family," he said. "To show you how much we care for you, I’m making you a 50-50 partner in my business. All you have to do is go to the factory every day and learn
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by John Braland on Apr 3, 2007
Here are some of the more humerous tombstone enscriptions found around the globe.
Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York: Born 1903-Died 1942 Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was.
• In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery: Here lies an Atheist All dressed up And
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 3,936 views
A true story that speaks about Mary’s extravagant love for Jesus.
A nine-year-old boy who lived in a rural town in Tennessee. His house was in a poor area of the community. A church had a bus ministry that came knocking on his door one Saturday afternoon. The kid came to answer the door and
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 1, 2001
based on 242 ratings
| 3,292 views
I heard about an African-American who tried to attend a church. Sadly, the church wouldn’t even let him attend a service.
The pastor said, "You just need to pray about it."
About three weeks later the pastor saw him and asked, "Did you talk to the Lord about it?"
The man said,
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Contributed by Charles Wallis on Dec 27, 2007
based on 3 ratings
| 1,584 views
Warren Wiersbe wrote “Paul did not say that we had to be worthy to partake of the Supper, but only that we should partake in a worthy manner. At a Communion service in Scotland, the pastor noted that a woman in the congregation did not accept the bread and cup from the elder, but instead sat
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Danny Thomas on May 21, 2001
based on 293 ratings
| 4,781 views
The Empty Chair
A man’s daughter had asked the local pastor to come and pray with her father. When the pastor arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows and an empty chair beside his bed. The priest assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit.
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by David Elvery on Nov 14, 2004
based on 4 ratings
| 2,710 views
Once there was a church in Holland once which felt strictly bound to obey God’s commandment to keep the Sabbath holy. On a certain Sunday the area was threatened by high wind and ferocious waves. If the dikes were not strengthened, the people would not survive. The police notified the pastor of
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Tim Parsons on Sep 17, 2006
I read of a young Christian artist who painted a depiction of hell. In the flames he painted the faces of several of his lost loved ones. He painted his lost father crying out in agony. There was also his lost brother, and a lost neighbor burning in the flames of hell. When he showed it to his
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Contributed by Dale Pilgrim on Dec 14, 2008
CHRISTMAS LIGHTS IN MARCH
Robert Russell, pastor and author, tells a story of how about twenty years ago there was a house near the entrance of his subdivision that kept their Christmas lights burning long after the season was past. They burned through January. Even through the first of February
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Denomination:
Salvation Army
based on 1 rating
| 5,152 views
GIVING, GREED AND SALVATION
A very old rich skinflint in declining health finally gets serious about his eternal state. He goes to the local pastor and asks what he can do to account for the fact that he’s never given God much time or given the church a dime. The pastor just looks at him with that
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Denomination:
United Methodist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 16, 2001
based on 19 ratings
| 1,984 views
Leighton Farrell was the minister of Highland Park Church in Dallas for many years. He tells of a man in the church who once made a covenant with a former pastor to tithe ten percent of their income every year. They were both young and neither of them had much money. But things changed. The layman
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Contributed by Carla Powell on Apr 20, 2002
based on 6 ratings
| 2,523 views
The story has been told of a church in the Pacific Northwest, which participates in the
"sharing of the peace" during worship. When they share the peace, they are exuberant
and enthusiastic. They leave their pews to embrace one another. Newcomers are warmly
welcomed with a kind word, a
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Sermon Central