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In Sermon Illustrations: "Off Color"

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  • Snickers Bar  PRO

    Contributed by Tad Mills on Feb 3, 2004
    based on 6 ratings
     | 2,971 views

    ILLUSTRATION: Pick someone out of the congregation who you know will be “grossed out by this”. Take a “Snickers” bar, hold it up and say: “This morning I want to give away this Snickers Candy Bar”. Then walk over to that person and say: “Ok, this candy bar is for you. I want you to have it. ...read more

  • This Is Not An Original With Me. I Heard It In A ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 6, 2004
    based on 17 ratings
     | 5,172 views

    This is not an original with me. I heard it in a sermon over twenty years ago given by Bro. Paul Holderfield. Johnny was not a very popular boy at school, in fact you might say he wasn’t liked at all. It was not anything in particular, well you know the type (maybe even been one of these ...read more

  • In William Steig's Yellow And Pink, A ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Mar 15, 2004
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,990 views

    In William Steig's Yellow and Pink, a delightfully whimsical picture book for children, two wooden figures wake up to find themselves lying on an old newspaper in the hot sun. One figure is painted yellow, the other pink. Suddenly, Yellow sits up and asks, "Do you know what we're doing ...read more

  • Once He Started Clamping Down, I Remember ...

    Contributed by David Ward on Dec 10, 2004
     | 1,297 views

    "Once he started clamping down, I remember thinking, This is it. I’m going to die." These were Anne Hjelle’s words in an interview with Inside Edition. Riding her mountain bike in a Southern California wilderness park, Anne was ferociously attacked by a mountain lion. Thrown off her bike, Anne ...read more

  • We Bought Our House From John And Donna Jackson. ...

    Contributed by Davon Huss on Oct 24, 2005
     | 1,965 views

    We bought our house from John and Donna Jackson. The Jackson’s have a son named Ben. Ben is mentally and physically challenged. In Ben’s room, he wrote in ink into the drywall, "Ben has the best daddy in the world." There were also wrestling pictures in permanent marker on the same wall. When ...read more

  • One Adult Swallow Got Alongside The Chicks And ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
     | 1,435 views

    "One adult swallow got alongside the chicks and started shoving them out toward the end of the branch--pushing, pushing, pushing. The end one fell off. Somewhere between the branch and the water four feet below, the wings started working, and the fledgling was off on his own. Then the second one. ...read more

  • Here Is A Poem That Was Given To Me By A Member ...  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
    based on 4 ratings
     | 3,971 views

    Here is a poem that was given to me by a member of my creative worship team that expresses what I am trying to tell you. I Am Thankful For The Wife Who Says It’s Hot Dogs Tonight, Because She Is Home With Me, And Not Out With Someone Else. For The Husband Who Is On The Sofa Being A Couch ...read more

  • God Gives A Warning, A Serious Warning. Wise And ...

    Contributed by Bobby Scobey on Jun 19, 2007
    based on 2 ratings
     | 2,701 views

    God gives a warning, a serious warning. Wise and sensitive souls respond quickly to the warning. Others do not. Charles Swindoll said he and his wife Cynthia were flying from Portland to Los Angeles after a pastors’ conference. After the flight reached cruising altitude, meals were being ...read more

  • When 53-Year-Old Danny Anderson Was Feeding His ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 1, 2008
     | 1,937 views

    When 53-year-old Danny Anderson was feeding his horses Monday night, a 5-foot rattler slithered onto his central Washington property. Anderson and his 27-year-old son, Benjamin, pinned the snake with an irrigation pipe and cut off its head with a shovel. A few more strikes to the head left it ...read more

  • You Put The Devil Out, But Did You Let Him Leave ...

    Contributed by Bobby Scobey on Apr 22, 2008
     | 4,465 views

    YOU PUT THE DEVIL OUT, BUT DID YOU LET HIM LEAVE HIS BAGS? You got out of a bad relationship because it was bad, but you are still resentful and angry. (You let the devil leave his bags.) You got out of financial debt, but you still can’t control the desire to spend on frivolous ...read more

  • When 53-Year-Old Danny Anderson Was Feeding His ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 12, 2008
     | 1,623 views

    When 53-year-old Danny Anderson was feeding his horses Monday night, a 5-foot rattler slithered onto his central Washington property. Anderson and his 27-year-old son, Benjamin, pinned the snake with an irrigation pipe and cut off its head with a shovel. A few more strikes to the head left it ...read more

  • Head Of A Dead Snake

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 28, 2008
     | 2,683 views

    HEAD OF A DEAD SNAKE When 53-year-old Danny Anderson was feeding his horses Monday night, a 5-foot rattlesnake slithered onto his central Washington property. Anderson and his 27-year-old son, Benjamin, pinned the snake with an irrigation pipe and cut off its head with a shovel. A few more ...read more

  • In 1989, A Terrible Earthquake Almost Flattened ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 28, 2008
     | 6,625 views

    In 1989, a terrible earthquake almost flattened Armenia. It killed over 30,000 people in less than four minutes. One father rushed to his son's school and found the building flat as a pancake. Standing there in tears, he remembered a promise he had made to his son, "No matter what, I'll always be ...read more

  • Silent When Needed

    Contributed by Wayne Presnell on Feb 10, 2009
     | 2,043 views

    SILENT WHEN NEEDED In the late 1990’s, our family lived in a split level apartment in Union Township, just north of Cincinnati, OH. It was a great location in many ways: it was close to a major freeway, but not so close that we had to listen to its traffic; it was just five minutes from the ...read more

  • Know-It-All Christians

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 13, 2009
     | 3,719 views

    KNOW-IT-ALL CHRISTIANS Chuck Yeager, the famed test pilot, was flying an F-86 Sabre over a lake in the Sierras when he decided to buzz a friend’s house near the edge of the lake. During a slow roll, he suddenly felt his aileron lock. Says Yeager, "It was a hairy moment, flying about 150 feet off ...read more

  • Getting Caught Asleep

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 8, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 4,869 views

    GETTING CAUGHT ASLEEP Just in case your boss catches you asleep at your desk, be ready to blurt out one of these excuses: "They told me at the blood bank that this might happen." "This is just a 15-minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to." "I was ...read more

  • The Cross: Solution To Alignment Problems  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Oct 18, 2009
    based on 4 ratings
     | 5,032 views

    THE CROSS: SOLUTION TO ALIGNMENT PROBLEMS I remember when my first car, a beautiful 92 Chevy Cavalier, developed and alignment problem. I would be driving down the freeway, and it pulled to the right pretty hard. In fact, you really had to work against the car to make it get in the left lane. On ...read more

  • Chief Justice Of Supreme Court Humble Enough To ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 17, 2009
     | 4,051 views

    Chief Justice of Supreme Court Humble Enough to Stand Next to a Chinese Laundryman As Christians, we are to trust God the Holy Spirit by being completely humble. Let me share a story which gives us a picture of humility; maybe you will see yourself in this story: When Charles Evans Hughes was ...read more

  • In A Remote Swiss Village Stands A Beautiful ...

    Contributed by Christian Cheong on Jun 28, 2010
     | 3,796 views

    In a remote Swiss village stands a beautiful church - Mountain Valley Cathedral. It has high pillars and magnificent stained glass windows, but what makes it special is the most beautiful pipe organ in the whole region. People would come from far off lands just to hear the lovely tunes of this ...read more

  • Post-It Notes—success From Failure  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Oct 27, 2010
    based on 5 ratings
     | 3,716 views

    Post-it® Notes--Success from Failure Everyone knows what Post-it® Notes are. They're those great little self-stick notepapers. Most people have Post-it® Notes. Most people use them. Most people love them. But Post-it® Notes were not a planned product. No one got the idea and then stayed up nights ...read more