Contributed by Steve Heartsill on Oct 25, 2000
based on 140 ratings
| 5,423 views
A woman walked into her bathroom at home. As she did, she saw her husband weighing himself on the bathroom scales, sucking in his stomach. The woman thought to herself, "He thinks that he will weigh less by sucking in his stomach." So, the woman rather sarcastically said to her husband,
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Baptist
Contributed by Davon Huss on Jan 29, 2001
based on 267 ratings
| 3,864 views
B. There is a story about four preachers discussing the merits of the various translations of the Bible. One liked the King James Version best because of its simple, beautiful English. Another liked the American Revised Version best because it was closer to the original Hebrew and Greek. Still
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Frank Houston on Jan 8, 2002
based on 35 ratings
| 5,769 views
BROKEN ALREADY
At the beginning of a new year, a high school principal decided to post his teachers’ new year’s resolutions on the bulletin board.
As the teachers gathered around the bulletin board, a great commotion started. One of the teachers was complaining. "Why weren’t my resolutions
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Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 19, 2002
based on 1 rating
| 2,432 views
What kinds of goals do the Hollywood crowd make? Rapper Jay Z says he just wants to "stay positive" in the coming year. Singer Michelle Branch says her goal for ’02 is "to drink more water." Actress Susan Sarandon says she just wants "to try to have more fun."
White House press secretary Ari
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Contributed by Jan Spencer on Mar 19, 2002
based on 71 ratings
| 4,864 views
WHAT IS A MOTHER?
Somewhere between the youthful energy of a teenager and the golden years of a woman’s life, there lives a marvelous and loving person known as "Mother."
A mother is a curious mixture of patience, kindness, understanding, discipline, industriousness, purity and love.
A mother
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Pentecostal
Contributed by Sermon Central on May 5, 2002
based on 22 ratings
| 2,672 views
LOVE THEM
Before becoming a mother I had a hundred theories on how to bring up children. Now I have seven children and only one theory: love them, especially when they least deserve to be loved.
Kate Samperi, author
SOURCE: Celebrating Mothers: A Book
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Contributed by Sermon Central on May 5, 2002
based on 18 ratings
| 4,631 views
MOM OF THE MIRACLE
September 4, 1990, was the beginning of a new era for the Ellison Family of Long Island. It was mom Jean’s first day of a new teaching job, and daughter Brooke’s first day of seventh grade. But things didn’t unfold as planned.
Brook was hit by a car that day, and
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Contributed by Sermon Central on May 5, 2002
based on 3 ratings
| 2,793 views
ONLY ENOUGH FOR TWO
She broke the bread into two fragments and gave them to the children, who ate with avidity.
"She hath kept none for herself," grumbled the Sergeant.
"Because she is not hungry," said the soldier.
"Because she is a mother," said the sargeant.
Victor Hugo
SOURCE: For Mom
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 9, 2002
based on 12 ratings
| 6,174 views
HONORING OUR FATHERS
I believe there is something in us--a law written on our hearts--that says, "Honor your father and mother." That’s how it’s stated in the Bible, but you’ll find it in all of the world’s religions. The ancient Chinese Analects advise, "surely proper behaviour to parent and
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 9, 2002
based on 11 ratings
| 2,920 views
WHO ARE YOU?
When Don called home from the road one evening, he spoke briefly to his nine-year-old daughter: "Honey, could you get your mommy on the phone?" He then heard Tasha blurt out, as she set the receiver down on the counter: "Hey Mom, the invisible man is on the phone!"
In that
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 9, 2002
based on 26 ratings
| 2,431 views
WE SHOULD HAVE BEEN QUIET
In the summer of 1959, my father left his two sons on the side of a South Dakota road with only their comic books. They had been fighting and screaming in the back seat and despite repeated warnings they continued to be boys.
I remember the feeling of watching the car
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Contributed by Bruce Howell on Jun 11, 2002
based on 29 ratings
| 3,046 views
THEN GOD MADE DADS
When the Lord was creating fathers he started with a tall frame. And an angel standing nearby said, “What kind of father is that? If You’re going to make children so close to the ground, why have you put fathers up so high? He won’t be able to shoot marbles without
kneeling.
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 11, 2002
based on 36 ratings
| 3,861 views
8 SIMPLE RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER
When I was in high school I used to be terrified of my girlfriend’s father, who I believe suspected me of wanting to place my hands on his daughter’s chest. He would open the door and immediately affect a good-naturedly murderous expression, holding out a
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Contributed by Aaron Burgess on Sep 26, 2002
based on 30 ratings
| 3,785 views
Erma Bombeck wrote this essay entitled, When God Created Women. “By the time the Lord made mothers, he was into his sixth day of working overtime. An Angel appeared and said "Why are you spending so much time on this one?" And the Lord answered and said, "Have you seen the spec sheet on her? She
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Denomination:
Independent/Bible
Contributed by Davon Huss on Oct 28, 2002
based on 57 ratings
| 5,148 views
BRAGGIN' 'BOUT DAD
Three boys in the schoolyard were bragging about who had the better father:
The first boy says, “My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, and they give him $100.”
The second boy says, “That’s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 19, 2002
based on 5 ratings
| 3,181 views
AN END IN MIND
Dr. Ari Kiev of Cornell University observed that from the moment people decided to concentrate all their energies on a specific objective, they began to surmount the most difficult odds. He concluded, "The establishment of
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