Contributed by Robert Sickler on Nov 15, 2011
PET BELIEFS
The two professors stood nose to nose as they shouted at one another. "The craters on the moon are the result of volcanism," cried one.
"You are an idiot," screamed the other, "the craters on the moon are the result of meteor impact."
This scene played itself out all across
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Denomination:
Christian Church
Contributed by Bo Dunford on Jan 15, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 2,559 views
* I’ve learned the meaning of a few words that women
use from time to time. * For instance ... The word “Fine.”
* This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
C) “Five Minutes.” * If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour!
* Five minutes is
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Brian La Croix on Oct 3, 2001
based on 49 ratings
| 2,307 views
A man working in the produce department was asked by a lady if she could buy half a head of lettuce. He replied, "Half a head? Are you serious? God grows these in whole heads and that’s how we sell them!"
"You mean," she persisted, "that after all the years I’ve shopped here, you won’t sell me
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Denomination:
Wesleyan
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 11, 2001
based on 90 ratings
| 1,261 views
Rules to help women understand men
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it’s up … don’t come tell us about it. Put it down.
2. Don’t cut your hair. Ever.
3. Don’t make us guess.
4. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to … expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
5. Sometimes
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Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 29, 2002
based on 6 ratings
| 1,315 views
You vs. The Boss:
If you take a long time, you’re slow.
BUT if your boss takes a long time, he’s thorough.
If you don’t do it, you’re lazy.
BUT if your boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy.
If you make a mistake, you’re an idiot.
BUT if your boss makes a mistake, he’s ’only human’.
If you’re on a day
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Contributed by Jonathan Busch on Feb 16, 2003
based on 83 ratings
| 6,107 views
The Creation
God created the mule and told him: "You will be mule, working constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy loads on your back. You will eat grass and you will lack intelligence. You will live for 50 years." The mule answered: "To live like this for 50 years is too much. Please,
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Jordan Wirkkala on Dec 12, 2007
-I was a groomsmen at a wedding once. It was a formal wedding, the place was packed and everyone was looking there finest. The wedding coordinator put a piece of tape on the floor for me to stand and said, “this is your spot, do not move”. The wedding was going beautifully until something awful
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by W F on Jan 27, 2008
based on 3 ratings
| 2,282 views
Speaking about balance, yesterday I read about a 28 year old woman in Sacramento who died last week from drinking too much water!
The woman had entered a competition on a radio station and the idea was to see who could drink the most water without having to go to the bathroom. The comp was called,
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Denomination:
*other
Contributed by Sean Harder on Aug 5, 2011
based on 1 rating
| 2,317 views
GIVE GOD THE BIG STUFF, TOO
I am mechanically inept and every once in a while I try to do some mechanical thing. Sometimes it's as simple as trying to put up a light fixture. Inevitably it fights back and doesn't go easily. I start getting frustrated and forcing the issue, usually making it worse.
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Contributed by James Jack on Jun 9, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 1,794 views
I’m writing school reports at the moment. It’s something I hate doing. We have a system where you’re expected to write 50-100 words per student so that in the end over all your reports you’ve written tens of thousands of words most of which begin or end with “Johhny needs to be more focused in
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Denomination:
Anglican
Contributed by Sheila Crowe on Aug 23, 2009
based on 1 rating
| 8,239 views
SEEING IN THE GLORY OF GOD
Tom Long, professor of Homiletics at Candler School of Theology, tells the story of striking up a conversation with a man on a plane. He said they shared the normal kind of nice chit chat, sharing what they each did for a living and sharing pictures of their families.
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Denomination:
United Methodist
Contributed by Thomas Cash on Jan 13, 2005
based on 10 ratings
| 1,633 views
Consider the following email recently sent to me titled "WORDS WOMEN USE."
"FINE."
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks——this will cause you to have one of those arguments.
"FIVE
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by James Jack on Jun 9, 2007
based on 10 ratings
| 2,916 views
The word “fool” doesn’t get as much use now as it once did. If one of my mates does something profoundly stupid I don’t usually cry out “you fool”. I might say “you are such an idiot” or “what a goose”. I’m sure many people you know would use much more colourful language than that. Fool is one of
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Denomination:
Anglican
Contributed by Brian Harvison on Apr 12, 2008
I recently met a new friend we’ll call Mike
Mike told me his testimony
Mike believed he was saved
Was going through life as a saved man, but not really on fire for God
Things that should have negatively affected him, his friends behavior, his environment , didn’t
He just ignored those things and
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Denomination:
Baptist
Sermon Central