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In Sermon Illustrations: "Fathers Day Jokes"

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  • I Was Fortunate To Grow Up In A Home Where My ...  PRO

    Contributed by Mark Brunner on Jun 22, 2004
    based on 7 ratings
     | 2,694 views

    I was fortunate to grow up in a home where my father was both a loving and disciplining presence. I guess I would have to say that if there is anything I really remember about my dad is this, he possessed a presence unlike any other person in my life. To me he was always larger than life. He ...read more

  • Dreary Statistics  PRO

    Contributed by Pb Stetser on Jul 6, 2004
    based on 6 ratings
     | 3,988 views

    Dreary Statistics • 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes --U.S. D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census • 85% of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes --Center for Disease Control • 80% of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes ...read more

  • Thank You, Dad  PRO

    Contributed by Michael Mccartney on Jul 23, 2004
    based on 18 ratings
     | 4,002 views

    THANK YOU, DAD Thank you Dad, for giving us a very special gift. Its the most important gift of all, That only love can give. You read us the Bible at bedtime and taught us how to pray. You made sure we made it to church every Sunday. And even though we acted like we didn’t hear a thing, When I’m ...read more

  • Guard Your Heart

    Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Jun 18, 2007
     | 3,950 views

    Edgar Guest said: I must be fit for a child to follow, scorning the places where loose men wallow; knowing how much he shall learn from me, I must be fair as I’d have him be. I must come home to him day by day, clean as the morning I went away. I must be fit for a child’s glad greeting; his are ...read more

  • The Most Important Gift

    Contributed by Owen Bourgaize on Jun 16, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,999 views

    THE MOST IMPORTANT GIFT Rob Parsons, the founder of "Care for the Family," asks the question, "What is the most important gift a father can give to his child?" He always gives the same answer: it is his unconditional love and acceptance. The key to a child’s heart is to let him or her know that ...read more

  • I Know A Mom Who Denies God's Call Upon Her ...

    Contributed by Ajai Prakash on Jun 15, 2010
     | 3,392 views

    I know a mom who denies God’s call upon her teenage boy and is constantly trying to lure him by feeding his flesh with earthly things so that he is satisfied with the things of the world and would not focus and pursue God’s call upon his life. She has been going to extents like getting young girls ...read more

  • His Last Thoughts Were Of His Children

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 4, 2010
    based on 1 rating
     | 5,237 views

    HIS LAST THOUGHTS WERE OF HIS CHILDREN A Union sergeant was killed on the first day of fighting in Gettysburg. He was just one of more than 3,000 Union soldiers who died in the three-day conflict. When his body was found later that week, lying in a secluded spot in Gettysburg, he was holding a ...read more

  • Man-Speak  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Aug 6, 2010
    based on 5 ratings
     | 4,099 views

    MAN-SPEAK Men don't always say what they mean. When a man says "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN." He means: "I have no idea how it works." When a man says "TAKE A BREAK, HONEY. YOU ARE WORKING TOO HARD." He means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner." When a man says "THAT'S ...read more

  • Looking For The Father  PRO

    Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Aug 30, 2001
    based on 59 ratings
     | 4,068 views

    LOOKING FOR THE FATHER Author Michael Green writes: Only Jesus fully understands God the Father. Great people have discovered and taught many true and noble things about God. Nobody has known him with the intimacy of Jesus, who could call him Abba, "dear daddy." When that holy man, Mahatma ...read more

  • They Need A Father  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on May 9, 2002
    based on 17 ratings
     | 3,134 views

    THEY NEED A FATHER ... “almost 75 percent of American children living in fatherless households will experience poverty before the age of eleven, compared to only 20 percent of those raised by two parents. Children living in homes where fathers are absent are far more likely to be expelled from or ...read more

  • A Father's Role  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on May 9, 2002
    based on 13 ratings
     | 3,587 views

    A FATHER'S ROLE James Dobson and Gary Bauer in their book Children at Risk articulate the importance of the father’s leadership and his role in the children’s emotional development and moral education: “Fathers must be there to tame adolescent boys, to give a young son a sense of what I means to ...read more

  • My Father  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 10, 2003
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,914 views

    My Father; When I was seven: My Dad was a genius When I was forteen: My Dad is wrong many times. When I was twenty: My Father is old fashion and not up to things. When I was twentyfive: The old man does not know what he is talking about, he is out of touch with reality. When I was thirty five: With ...read more

  • My Father  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Oct 24, 2003
    based on 8 ratings
     | 4,276 views

    My Father is very patient and kind. My Father is not envious, never boastful. My Father is not arrogant. My Father is never rude, nor is He self-seeking. My Father is not quick to take offense. My Father keeps no score of wrongs. My Father does not gloat over my sins but is always glad when truth ...read more

  • Observations Of A Father

    Contributed by Chuck Musselwhite on Jun 21, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 5,183 views

    Observations of a Father • I am going to share with you all my wisdom of four years of parenting • Okay let’s look at what the Bible says • When I had my first child I lost half of my memory, when I had my second child I lost the other half, when I had my third I lost another half I didn’t know I ...read more

  • A Father's Love

    Contributed by Bruce Howell on Jun 13, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 14,094 views

    A FATHER'S LOVE A father had told his son he would send him to sleep in the attic with only bread and water for his supper if he disobeyed. Well, the boy disobeyed and was sent to the attic. But the father couldn’t eat. He had his son on his mind and his heart. His wife said, “I know what you ...read more

  • Father Will Be Angry

    Contributed by Guy Glass on Jun 14, 2010
    based on 2 ratings
     | 5,655 views

    FATHER WILL BE ANGRY The story is told of a young boy was driving a big hayrack down the road and it turned over right in front of a farmer's house. The farmer came out and saw the young boy crying and said, "Son, don't worry about this, we can fix it. Right now dinner's ready. Why don't you come ...read more

  • A Father's Protection

    Contributed by Perry Greene on Mar 8, 2012
    based on 2 ratings
     | 6,370 views

    A FATHER'S PROTECTION Certain Native American tribes had a rite of passage for their teenage boys. At age 13 a boy would be blindfolded and led to a certain spot in the woods. He would be forced to sit down while the men of the tribe returned to their camp. The boy would be required to sit all ...read more

  • Treasure Hunting With Jesus ✞ Marks The Spot.

    Contributed by Coz Von on Feb 11, 2016
    based on 1 rating
     | 7,124 views

    John 3:16-17 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved. Today’s hidden treasures are. 1. You ...read more

  • There Have Been Many Practical Jokes Pulled On ...

    Contributed by Gene Gregory on Apr 12, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,513 views

    There have been many practical jokes pulled on folks in recognition of this day. In 2005, the media reported that NASA had discovered water on Mars, and had actual pictures on the official NASA website. Those who went to the NASA website to check it out, found a picture of a glass of water ...read more

  • Then God Made Dads  PRO

    Contributed by Bruce Howell on Jun 11, 2002
    based on 29 ratings
     | 3,172 views

    THEN GOD MADE DADS When the Lord was creating fathers he started with a tall frame. And an angel standing nearby said, “What kind of father is that? If You’re going to make children so close to the ground, why have you put fathers up so high? He won’t be able to shoot marbles without kneeling. ...read more