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In Sermon Illustrations: "Dad Jokes"

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  • Everybody Hates Chris: Right Day, Wrong Year

    Contributed by Johnny Wilson on Nov 23, 2009
     | 3,065 views

    EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS: RIGHT DAY, WRONG YEAR Once there was a covenant with Noah, with Abram, with Moses, and with David, but now there is a NEW covenant written in the blood of Jesus. That promise, that contract, never expires. It is guaranteed by God's action, not our actions. The word often ...read more

  • Knots In Your Life

    Contributed by Davon Huss on Feb 21, 2011
     | 2,136 views

    KNOTS IN YOUR LIFE The Baxter boys, Paul and John, liked to play in the woods near their home. They like the woods because they always found something they had never seen before. That's the way it was when they discoverd the tree with the knot tied in it. The knot was about halfway up the tree. ...read more

  • What Happens At Home

    Contributed by Sermon Central on May 2, 2012
     | 2,588 views

    WHAT HAPPENS AT HOME Howard Hendricks used to say to us men in seminary preparing to lead churches, "If your Christianity isn't working at home, don't export it." It was his way of saying, "If you can't make your faith work in your own family, then please don't try to make it work in the family of ...read more

  • Death Of An Eagle

    Contributed by Wade Martin Hughes, Sr on Dec 29, 2020
    based on 2 ratings
     | 3,493 views

    There was a talented young Indian boy that loved hunting. One of his goals was to get an eagle. He so needed the eagle to build his elaborate head dress. All the eagles would fly around the young boy and mock him. He could never be the chief without a beautiful eagle feather head dressing. The ...read more

  • Giving Blood  PRO

    Contributed by Matthew Rogers on Mar 11, 2002
    based on 25 ratings
     | 5,927 views

    GIVING BLOOD Priscilla Larson writes, “My brother-in-law, who is a minister, responded to a Red Cross appeal for blood donations. When he didn’t come home by the time his young son expected him, the boy asked his mother, ‘Is Dad going around visiting all the sick people?’ His mother replied, ‘He’s ...read more

  • I've Heard Many People Say So Many Times That You ...  PRO

    Contributed by Russ Sharrock on May 4, 2002
    based on 3 ratings
     | 2,570 views

    I’ve heard many people say so many times that you can’t tell the difference between a Christian and a non-Christian. Alice’s sister-in-law, Keiko, is a New Age Soka Gakkai Buddhist. She is so serene, so filled with peace and joy, that Alice’s brother, her Mom and Step dad, have all been drawn ...read more

  • Fatherless America  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 1, 2002
    based on 23 ratings
     | 4,404 views

    FATHERLESS AMERICA Tonight, 40% of all American children will go to sleep in a house in which their fathers do not live. Before the age of eighteen, more than 50% of our children will spend a significant portion of their childhood living apart from their fathers. A generation ago, an ...read more

  • Giving Blood" Priscilla Larson Writes, "My ...  PRO

    Contributed by Charles Salmon on Aug 18, 2004
    based on 4 ratings
     | 5,198 views

    "Giving Blood" Priscilla Larson writes, "My brother-in-law, who is a minister, responded to a Red Cross appeal for blood donations. When he didn’t come home by the time his young son expected him, the boy asked his mother, ‘Is Dad going around visiting all the sick people?’ His mother replied, ...read more

  • Moms Staying Home Of The 41.8 Million Kids Under ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 3, 2006
     | 1,110 views

    Moms Staying Home Of the 41.8 million kids under 15 who lived with two parents last year, more than 25% had stay-at-home moms according to a recent Census Bureau report. This is up from 23%, or 9.4 million kids in ’94. Full-time stay-at-home dads took care of 189,000 kids in ’02, up 18%. Experts ...read more

  • Looks Can Be Deceiving  PRO

    Contributed by Thomas Cash on Aug 20, 2007
    based on 5 ratings
     | 2,934 views

    Looks can be deceiving - David was small but became a great King - Most of the Apostles were simple men with little education Years ago a tall truck approached a low railroad overpass. The driver paid no attention to the warning signs and found himself wedged under the bridge. No one on the ...read more

  • On The Farm Where I Grew Up, We Raised Black ...

    Contributed by Glenn Durham on Mar 4, 2008
     | 1,011 views

    On the farm where I grew up, we raised Black Angus cattle. In order to corral them for tagging or medicines, dad would drive the truck through the fields and I would sit on the tailgate. As we approached a group of cattle, I would rattle a bag and pour a small amount of the contents onto the ground ...read more

  • I Met My Best Friend In A Texas High School In ...

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Mar 10, 2008
     | 1,266 views

    "I met my best friend in a Texas high school in 1981. We were both military brats who’d spent time in Germany so we had some stuff in common. "While my mom was organizing old photos in 1986, we discovered that my family and my best friend’s family had stayed at the same hotel in Munich during the ...read more

  • Elf

    Contributed by Charles Wilkerson on Dec 1, 2008
     | 3,056 views

    ELF In the Christmas movie Elf the title character discovers he was a human baby raised by elves. He travels back to New York City to find his bio-dad, in the process learns, and teaches others about caring. Will Ferrell describes his journey by saying, "I passed through the seven levels of the ...read more

  • H.b. London Jr., Of Focus On The Family, Writes ...

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jan 26, 2009
     | 1,525 views

    H.B. London Jr., of Focus on the Family, writes about his relationship with his father, who was a pastor: "My father was a great preacher. I only wish I had known him better. He was an absentee dad. I searched for a relationship with him until the time of his death, but I never found it. To give ...read more

  • A Hearing Test  PRO

    Contributed by Andrew Chan on May 3, 2002
    based on 18 ratings
     | 5,084 views

    A HEARING TEST Here’s a test to see if you listen well… 1. A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two-tired. 2. What’s the definition of a will? (It’s a dead giveaway). 3. In democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism it’s your count that votes. 4. A chicken crossing the road ...read more

  • I Heard Once Of A Man Who Was An American Indian ...  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Wood on Jun 5, 2002
    based on 6 ratings
     | 1,847 views

    I heard once of a man who was an American Indian and had been converted. He described the old and the new nature this way, “There’s two dogs that live in me, one’s the old dog, he’s mean and vicious and hard and sinful. Then there’s the new dog who walks after Christ. He said they’re constantly ...read more

  • Let's Imagine Dialogue Between Abraham And God. ...  PRO

    Contributed by Ray Pritchard on Aug 28, 2003
    based on 36 ratings
     | 4,442 views

    Let’s imagine dialogue between Abraham and God. “Abraham, this is God speaking. I want you to leave everything and go to the land I will show you.” “Where’s that?” “If I told you, you wouldn’t believe me.” “Try me.” “It’s 1500 miles from here in a place called Canaan.” “Never heard of it.” ...read more

  • Before I Discovered That My Cell Phone Had A ...  PRO

    Contributed by Josh Mcdowell on Mar 9, 2005
    based on 3 ratings
     | 12,484 views

    Before I discovered that my cell phone had a lock screen button I would often accidentally dial the last number in my cell phone’s registry. The biggest problem was that I never realized that it had happened. I would go on with normal life and my cell phone would be on for an extended period of ...read more

  • Jim Dobson Tells The Story About A Couple Whose ...

    Contributed by Jim Kane on Mar 12, 2005
     | 1,983 views

    Jim Dobson tells the story about a couple whose husband placed an ad in the Rocky Mountain News just prior to a Super Bowl a few years ago. WILL TRADE Will trade my noncooking and Nonshopping wife with attitude problem For one Super Bowl ticket No Indiangivers Call so-and-so at ...read more

  • Well, For You Who Aren't Sure If You Were From A ...  PRO

    Contributed by K. Edward Skidmore on Dec 13, 2005
    based on 9 ratings
     | 2,247 views

    Well, for you who aren’t sure if you were from a small town, let me help you out. You know you’re from a small town when: • The city limits signs are both on the same post! • The local Motel 6 sleeps 6. (You’ll notice is says that in Bethlehem “…there was no room in THE Inn.” Bethlehem didn’t ...read more