Contributed by John Shearhart on Feb 16, 2007
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You Know It’s A Bad Church Business Meeting When...
…People arrive at the meeting, clutching copies of books about "spiritual abuse."
…You’re asked to try on a pair of bloody gloves.
…A loyal supporter presses a can of Mace into your hands.
…The church constitution suddenly becomes revered as
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Contributed by Garris Hudson on Apr 2, 2022
As a result of poor planning, a man needed some same-day dry cleaning before he left on a trip. He remembered one store with a huge sign, "One-Hour Dry Cleaners," on the other side of town, so he drove out of his way to drop off a suit.
After filling out the tag, he told the clerk,
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Garris Hudson on Mar 19, 2023
based on 2 ratings
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A minister said that once he had a small, white Highland terrier puppy which he kept spotlessly clean by frequent washing, brushing, and powdering. One night a winter storm dropped a fresh blanket of snow on the countryside, and the next morning the whole world seemed to glisten under the splendor
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Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Brien Sims on Dec 13, 2007
Speaking of contaminants let me tell you about a house I once helped my landlord clean. It was back when we lived in Moberly, just a few blocks away from our house. I had helped my landlord, Dr. Stan McCreary, do many things and so he asked me if I wouldn’t mind helping him fix up a house he had
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Davon Huss on Oct 24, 2005
We bought our house from John and Donna Jackson. The Jackson’s have a son named Ben. Ben is mentally and physically challenged. In Ben’s room, he wrote in ink into the drywall, "Ben has the best daddy in the world." There were also wrestling pictures in permanent marker on the same wall. When
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Brian Atwood on Jan 7, 2008
based on 7 ratings
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Michael Yaconelli, co-founder of the Christian Publishing Company, "Youth Specialties," wrote the following in his book, "Messy Spirituality."
For a period of time, we were lucky enough to have a housekeeper. She would come in once a week to dust, vacuum, and clean every little out-of-the-way
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Denomination:
Baptist
based on 1 rating
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The Greek word for ’sincere’ means to test by sunlight. When you wash windows you can think you have cleaned the window well but when the sun shines on them you can see alot of streeks and smears. When the light of the Holy
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Assembly Of God
Contributed by Donnie Martin on Nov 13, 2007
The famous preacher D.L. Moody told about a Christian woman who was always bright, cheerful, and optimistic, even though she was confined to her room because of illness. She lived in an attic apartment on the fifth floor of an old, rundown building.
A friend decided to visit her one day and
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jul 21, 2008
based on 2 ratings
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DEAD TO SIN, REMADE IN CHRIST
When Standard Oil Company began to refine petroleum, there was a black substance, a by-product, that no one knew what to do with. It was black, sticky, and stinky. It couldn’t be buried because it would just find its way to the surface again. It couldn’t be burned
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THE BRIDE OF CHRIST
When I was a janitor at O.B.C. there were two or three times I had the opportunity to clean the floors in the girls dorms. One thing that astounded me as I went from room to room was the large pin-up pictures and posters of brides on the walls. Some of these girls had
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Bill Butsko on Apr 13, 2012
PEOPLE MATTER
During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: 'What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely, this was some kind of joke.
I had seen
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Christian Church
Contributed by Clark Tanner on Nov 6, 2000
based on 133 ratings
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C.S.Lewis said it quite well:
“The greatest evil is not done in those sordid dens of evil that Dickens loved to paint... but is conceived and ordered (moved, seconded, carried and minuted) in clean, carpeted, warmed, well-lighted offices, by quiet men with white
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Denomination:
Orthodox
based on 5 ratings
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Story: According to an ancient Russian Orthodox tradition, the day before Easter was devoted to telling jokes.
Priests would join the people in telling their best jokes to one another. (presumably “clean” jokes!!)
The reason was to reflect the joke God pulled on the devil in the
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Denomination:
Anglican
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