Contributed by Paul Humphrey on Sep 3, 2006
based on 1 rating
| 4,886 views
Sez I to myself, as I grumbled and growled,
Im sick of my church, and then how I scowled.
The members unfriendly, the sermons too long;
In fact, it seems that everything’s wrong.
I don’t like the singing; the church a disgrace
For signs of neglect are all over the place.
I’ll quit going there, and
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Denomination:
United Methodist
Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Apr 27, 2001
based on 157 ratings
| 3,846 views
[Clothes Make a Church]
A Methodist church tried to get a man to attend, but he never did.
"Why don’t you come?" the minister asked, and the man finally admitted it was because he didn’t have proper clothes.
So a member of the congregation took him to a clothing store and got him a nice suit,
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Ervin Kimrey on Jul 17, 2007
based on 4 ratings
| 2,382 views
"Tavern vs Church"
The story is told of a man who got a permit to open the first tavern in a small town. The members of a local church were strongly opposed to the bar, so they began to pray that God would intervene.
A few days before the tavern was scheduled to open, lightning hit the
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Clark Tanner on Aug 21, 2007
“The church, especially in the realm of evangelicalism, has over history bounced between two extremes. On the one hand isolationism, which makes us very sure of what we have to say but there’s no one to talk to, on the other an absorption by the culture, which gives us someone to
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Denomination:
Orthodox
Contributed by Richard Goble on Nov 16, 2007
Appropriate Church Behavior
In church last Sunday I noted a small child who was turning around smiling at everyone. He wasn’t gurgling, spitting, humming, tearing the hymnbooks, or rummaging through his mother’s handbag. He was just smiling.
Suddenly his mother jerked him around, and in a stage
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Denomination:
Baptist
It is said that a church is considered evangelistically effective if just 1 person in 20 in that church leads a person to Christ in a year. This would mean that a church of 100 people would see five people come to Christ in their ministry in a year’s
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Sermon Central on Apr 8, 2008
STAY AWAKE IN CHURCH
Each of us should periodically make a personal spiritual assessment. If we have never truly been awake, we must ask the God of grace to help us believe. We must confess our sin, declare our faith in Christ, and ask Christ to make us brand-new — to receive him as our Savior.
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Contributed by Brian Harvison on Apr 12, 2008
based on 1 rating
| 1,559 views
The job of the church is not to impact the church, but to impact the world.
It’s like a huddle in a football game.
67,000 people don’t pay $50.00 a ticket to watch the World champion Giants huddle.
What if you went to a Giants game and for 2 ½ hours you watched 11 men stand in a circle and
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Matthew Kratz on May 18, 2008
based on 4 ratings
| 2,586 views
MENTORING AS A CHURCH PRACTICE
"...In most churches, the congregation pays the pastor to preach, win the lost, and build up the saved—-while the church members function as cheerleaders (if they are enthusiastic) or spectators. The "converts" are won, baptized, and given the right hand of
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Denomination:
Other
Contributed by Dave Kinney on Aug 9, 2008
A CHURCH FOR 57 CENTS
It was 1938 when a little girl went to church for the first time. She was found sobbing loudly by the pastor and he asked her what the problem was. She said, "I can't go in the class because there's no more room."
Pastor Larry picked the little shabby dressed, unkepted girl
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Andy Grossman on Jan 6, 2009
WHO OWNS THE CHURCH?
My grandson Nate and I went to the Church New Year's day to clean up after our wonderful New Year's Eve party. On the way there he asked, "Granpa, do you own the church?"
I said, "No. I just manage it." He says, "Well, who owns it?"
I tried to tell him that the
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Denomination:
Holiness
based on 1 rating
| 2,603 views
There is a church in Millan, Italy that was bombed out during WWII. All of the walls of the church fell down during the war except one. The wall left standing had Leonardo Da Vinci’s "Last Supper" scene painted on it. What a wonderful illustration of how this meal that we call the Lord’s
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Johnny Creasong on Apr 22, 2009
FALLING ASLEEP IN CHURCH
Please don't think I'm complaining about folks who fall asleep in church. I understand some people can’t help it. I am convinced that some people fall asleep in church during the sermon because their have a physical ailment. Some folk must have a snooze button attached at
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Sermon Central