Contributed by Warner Pidgeon on Dec 23, 2011
Someone suggested to me recently that if money ever became tight I should consider becoming a joke writer for Christmas crackers. So, I turned to him and asked, "What did the grumpy sheep say when the
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Anglican
Contributed by Pat Cook on Jul 22, 2005
based on 5 ratings
| 2,758 views
I like the joke about the guy named John, who had a really horrible memory. One day John ran into a friend whom he had not seen in a long time. He greeted him and said, “Bill, do you remember what a bad memory I had?”
Bill answered, “Yes, I certainly do.”
“Well, it’s not bad any more. I
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Baptist
based on 1 rating
| 2,867 views
Will Rogers – “I don’t know any jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.”
THERESA OF AVILA, A SPANISH NUN said “SHE WHO LAUGHS, LASTS!” She used to look for novices who knew how to LAUGH, EAT AND SLEEP. She believed that if they ate heartily they were healthy, if they slept well
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Baptist
JOKE: Doctor: I have some good news and I have some bad news. Patient: What’s the good news? Doctor: The good news is that the tests you took showed that you have 24 hours to live. Patient: That’s the good news? What’s
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Baptist
Contributed by Bill Prater on Jan 3, 2001
based on 130 ratings
| 8,704 views
‘Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house, nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I’d nibbled, the fudge I did taste, all the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number! When I walked to the store (less a walk than a
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Baptist
Contributed by Melvin Newland on Feb 14, 2001
based on 105 ratings
| 4,195 views
A minister friend of mine received a Christmas card with a note in it from a lady in his congregation. He said she was very complimentary about his preaching, & compared him with Billy Graham. She finished by writing, "I think you are one of the really great preachers of all time."
Later that
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Bruce Emmert on Mar 5, 2001
based on 134 ratings
| 3,426 views
One of my favorite movies is the Christmas classic, A Christmas Story, the saga of a little boy named Ralphie Parker growing up in Gary, Indiana of the 1950’s. Ralphie has been drinking Ovaltine for months, saving up box tops so that he could send in a get a Little Orphan Annie Secret Decoder Ring.
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United Methodist
Contributed by Evie Megginson on Mar 17, 2001
based on 147 ratings
| 5,248 views
On Christmas afternoon, the Pastor’s wife dropped into an easy chair saying, "Boy! Am I ever tried." Her husband looked over at her & said, "I had to conduct two special services last night, three today, & give a total of five sermons. Why
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Baptist
Contributed by Steve Malone on Nov 13, 2001
based on 151 ratings
| 3,319 views
Christmas is an exciting time and little Sammy was excited. He was 15 years old and Christmas was still to him a time of wonder. He was a happy child despite his handicap. You see, Sammy was slightly retarded. He still went to school, though he was 2 years behind. And he did the things that
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Steve Malone on Nov 13, 2001
based on 244 ratings
| 8,161 views
YOU KNOW CHRISTMAS IS ALMOST HERE WHEN:
10) There are more pine needles on your carpet than on your tree
9) The credit card is smoked along with the turkey and ham.
8) It’s A Wonderful Life has been shown for the 13th time
7) A trip to the mall and back is more challenging then the Indy 500
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Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 10, 2002
based on 47 ratings
| 5,954 views
THE CHRISTMAS STORM: A Modern Parable by Paul Harvey
"This is about a modern man, one of us, he was not a scrooge, he was a kind, decent, mostly good man, generous to his family, upright in his dealings with others. But he did not believe in all that incarnation stuff that the Churches proclaim
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Contributed by Aaron Burgess on Dec 14, 2002
based on 49 ratings
| 2,800 views
A family celebrated Christmas every year with a birthday party for Jesus. An extra chair of honor at the table became the family’s reminder of Jesus’ presence. A cake with candles, along with the singing of "Happy Birthday" expressed the family’s joy in Jesus’ presence. One year on Christmas
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Independent/Bible
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