Contributed by Dru Ashwell on Dec 16, 2001
based on 19 ratings
| 2,524 views
Actual answering machine answers recorded and verified by the
world-famous International Institute of Answering Machine Answers.
~~~~~
Hi. Now you say something.
~~~~~
Hi, I’m not home right now but my answering machine is, so you
can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
~~~~~
Hello. I am David’s
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Paul Fritz on Dec 3, 2001
based on 2 ratings
| 2,230 views
A murderer broke into an old couple’s bedroom. Before he pulled the trigger on his victims, he always made a point of asking them their names. When he asked the woman for her name, she said, "Elizabeth." The man with the gun said, "Oh, I can’t shoot you because that is my mother’s name." Then he
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Sermon Central on Dec 21, 2005
based on 1 rating
| 3,307 views
Once, when a stubborn disputer seemed unconvinced, Lincoln said, “Well, let’s see how many legs has a cow?” “Four, of course,” came the reply disgustedly. “That’s right,” agreed Lincoln. “Now suppose you call the cow’s tail a leg; how many legs would the cow have?” “Why, five, of course,” was the
...read more
Tags:
Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
Once, when a stubborn disputer seemed unconvinced, Lincoln said, "Well, let’s see how many legs has a cow?" "Four, of course," came the reply disgustedly. "That’s right," agreed Lincoln. "Now suppose you call the cow’s tail a leg; how many legs would the cow have?" "Why, five, of course," was the
...read more
Tags:
Contributed by Brian Matherlee on Nov 29, 2007
ii. Robert Barrantes is a pastor in San Jose, Costa Rica. When he first felt the call of God to plant a church he knew it would be a challenge. God called him to begin a church in one of the toughest parts of San Jose. He came up against severe opposition from the drug peddlers, pimps and bar
...read more
Denomination:
Wesleyan
Contributed by Davon Huss on Nov 24, 2008
The recent problems in our economy can be used as a wakeup call for us all. Maybe this current anxiety will turn many eyes toward God. The church is often at its best in tragedy and calamity. In 1867, many banks and factories were closing in America. Because of these problems, Jeremiah Lanphier
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by David Tack on Jul 6, 2009
IT'S ALL HIS!
We’ve charted at least 100,000 light years (186,282 mps) from rim to rim of world! - 600 million billion miles of stars...all His!
In the midst of the millions of galaxies, we have one galaxy called Milky Way. In the midst of which we have one star (we call sun), with its baby
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Darren Ethier on May 21, 2002
based on 9 ratings
| 4,224 views
In 1858 a Sunday School teacher, Mr. Kimball, led a Boston shoe clerk to give his life to Jesus Christ. The clerk was Dwight L. Moody who became an evangelist. In 1879 while preaching in England the heart of a pastor named F.B. Meyer was set on fire, who later came to an American college campus to
...read more
Scripture:
Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Sermon Central on Nov 24, 2002
based on 5 ratings
| 5,126 views
"TO JESUS ON HIS BIRTHDAY"
The American poet Edna St. Vincent Millay once wrote a biting, ironic poem called "To Jesus on His Birthday." Surely none of us can deny guilt in some of the areas it includes in its brief scope:
For this, your mother sweated in the cold,
For this you bled upon the
...read more
Tags:
based on 29 ratings
| 3,346 views
CHRISTIAN FOOTBALL!!
Quarterback Sneak - Church members quietly leaving during the invitation.
Draw Play - What many children do with the bulletin during worship.
Half-time - The period between Sunday school and worship when many choose to leave.
Benchwarmer - Those who do not sing, pray, work,
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
Contributed by Jeff Armbrester on Mar 24, 2003
based on 6 ratings
| 2,339 views
Have you ever watched a 2000-pound horse pull logs? A few years ago, a friend called to tell me that a man who lived over the hill from us was having some trees cut out of his yard and they were using a Belgium horse to drag the logs. Lisa, Adam, Aaron, and I loaded up and went to watch. Like most
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Methodist
Contributed by Evie Megginson on Apr 19, 2004
based on 1 rating
| 1,499 views
In his book, Thirteen Days to Glory, author Lon Tinkle tells about Colonel Jim Bowie and the brave defenders of the Alamo. That sacred Texas shrine had only 183 defenders against a huge army led by Santa Anna. On March 3, 1836, two hours before dusk, the Mexican guns quit firing. William Travis
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Jimmy Chapman on Nov 3, 2006
The humorous story is told of a baseball manger who decided to play a rookie in right field one day. The regular fielder wasn’t happy about it and loudly makes it know from the bench that it was a big mistake to play the kid.
As it turned out the rookie was so nervous that he messed up
...read more
Tags:
Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Sermon Central on Feb 26, 2007
There was apparently a middle school in Oregon that faced a unique problem. Kind of a funny problem, actually. The custodian was constantly cleaning lipstick off the mirror in the girls’ bathroom.
It was a middle school, and many of the girls were just starting to use lipstick. So they’d go into
...read more
Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Apr 8, 2007
based on 2 ratings
| 2,458 views
here is a persistent legend in connection with the building of Solomon’s temple that perfectly illustrates this prophecy. The stones for the temple were prepared in advance in a nearby quarry. As they were needed, they were raised up to the building site. One day the workers in the quarry sent up a
...read more
Denomination:
Other
Sermon Central