Contributed by Sermon Central on Jun 18, 2007
based on 3 ratings
| 1,683 views
I like the old story about the guy who came to church with his family. As they were driving home afterward he was complaining about everything. He said, “The music was too loud. The sermon was too long. The announcements were unclear. The building was hot. The people were unfriendly.” He went on &
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Contributed by Matthew Kratz on Jun 25, 2007
The Bigger the Better
Joseph Stowell recounted a story: I was in West Africa—Timbuktu to be exact—and the missionaries were telling me that in that culture the larger the women were the more beautiful they were thought to be. In fact, a young missionary who had a small, trim wife said that the
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Denomination:
Other
Contributed by Kent Kessler on Aug 30, 2007
based on 7 ratings
| 2,389 views
Three weeks after her wedding day, Joanna called her minister in hysterics. She was crying, “Pastor, John and I had our first fight together! It was awful. What am I going to do?"
The pastor, leaning back in his chair and shaking his head said, "Calm down, Joanna, this isn’t nearly as bad as you
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Denomination:
Methodist
In Australia the early prison authorities knew this
To control and break the really bad prisoners
They developed a solitary confinement gaol at Port Arthur,
Where prisoners could have no contact with anyone else
they were kept in a dark cell
and even the prison guards wore cloth on their feet when
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Denomination:
Lutheran
Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Jan 2, 2008
Someone was discussing with his preacher the advisability of writing down the names of the bride and groom in his notes. He had heard about a priest who was too proud to do that, and ended up calling a groom by the wrong name. The preacher said, "You think that’s bad? I began a ceremony and
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Jesse Bennett on Nov 14, 2008
Stupid with money
Will Smith
Item: Dog shrink
Cost: $2,500/month
When the pressure of life get his dogs down, Smith’s four Rottweilers visit the Sigmund Freud of the canine world — renowned Hollywood hound analyst Cesar Millan, a.k.a. “The Dog Whisperer.” Apparently, it takes a special talent to
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by David Limiero on Jun 5, 2001
based on 80 ratings
| 2,185 views
And yet James Dobson asked hundreds of teens what they would like to tell their parents. Their answers might surprise you:
* Teach us about God and spiritual things.
* Guide us towards good marriages by modeling a good one.
* Don’t curse and smoke, if you don’t want us too.
* Be consistent and
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Darren Ethier on May 21, 2002
based on 66 ratings
| 2,129 views
A young woman went to her pastor and said, "Pastor, I have a besetting sin, and I want your help. I come to church on Sunday and can’t help thinking I’m the prettiest girl in the congregation. I know I ought not think that, but I can’t help it. I want you to help me with it."The pastor replied,
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Denomination:
Pentecostal
Contributed by Tim Richards on Sep 3, 2005
"In a song written by Tim McGraw for his dying father, the country music superstar describes how his death caused him to reevaluate his life. After learning the bad news, he "went sky divin’, went Rocky Mountain climbing, went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fu Manchu. I loved deeper, and I spoke
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Denomination:
Baptist
Contributed by Steven Cannon on Jan 16, 2007
John 11:38 Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance.John 11:39 "Take away the stone," he said. "But, Lord," said Martha, the sister of the dead man, "by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days." John 11:40 Then
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Mark Eberly on Oct 6, 2009
That no one except God is perfect but we don’t want people to think we are “that bad.”
We pose. We pretend. We put on our plastic masks. We go to “church.”
I saw a commercial recently about a new type of veneer for your teeth that is supposed to be the best yet. What I thought was incredibly
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Denomination:
Church Of God
Contributed by Bill Butsko on Mar 12, 2010
WHEN GOD FORGIVES, HE FORGETS
How different God’s pardon is from ours! So often we forgive as did the mother of the little girl who had been good a whole week, and asked mother for a favor. "I know," was the answer, "that you have been good all this week, but you know you were bad last week."
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Denomination:
Christian Church
Contributed by Bill Burress on Nov 1, 2010
TOO FAST
There was football team who never won a game, so one day before practice the coach decided to have a talk with them. He told them, "Men, our offense is bad, our defense is horrible, and our special teams are the worst I have ever seen, so today we are going back to the basics and start
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Mark Schaeufele on May 26, 2011
WRATH ON THE MESSENGER
I don't know about you, but one of my all-time favorite TV shows is M*A*S*H. I especially loved it when the company clerk Radar would have to give bad news to the head nurse "Hot Lips" Hoolihan. He would tell her the news and expect to have to face her wrath even though he
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Denomination:
Methodist
DO YOU WANT TO HEAR A REALLY BAD DAD JOKE?????
It was a nice summer day when 2 flies came upon a picnic lunch. Finding only baloney, they promptly ate their fill.
The flies then flew to a nearby well for a drink, then they sat on the pump handle to rest and talk.
After a few minutes, one said he
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Denomination:
Evangelical/Non-Denominational
If we set ourselves up as the Judge of who is and is not righteous, we’ll get it wrong as often as we’ll get it right.
Through the years I’ve had numerous occasions when folks warned me to watch out for other people in a church. The amazing thing is that --- in almost every case --- the people I
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Sherm Nichols on Dec 31, 2007
based on 1 rating
| 2,950 views
A man fell into a pit and couldn’t get himself out.
A Christian Scientist came along and said: "You only think that you are in a pit".
A Pharisee said: "Only bad people fall into a pit".
A Legalist said: "You deserve your pit".
A Charismatic said: "Just confess that you’re
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Denomination:
Christian/Church Of Christ
Contributed by Charles Trout on Mar 9, 2001
based on 113 ratings
| 3,042 views
Often in reflection, what we have feared most wasn’t all that bad.
Illustration:
One of my all time favorite TV shows, for having good moral lessons as plot lines, was the "Andy Griffith Show." There was an episode where young Opie was having his "Milk nickel" bullied away from him and could not
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Denomination:
Baptist
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