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In Sermon Illustrations: "jokes"

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  • Work In God's Kingdom  PRO

    Contributed by Owen Bourgaize on Jan 23, 2007
    based on 4 ratings
     | 4,470 views

    WORK IN GOD’S KINGDOM John Stott tells a joke against his vocation: a clefgyman is the last person in the world to write about work. For, as everybody knows, he has not done an honest day’s work in his life. As the old saying goes, he is ‘six days invisible and one day incomprehensible!’ The ...read more

  • One Traditional Question Jewish Children Ask ...  PRO

    Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Jan 29, 2007
    based on 4 ratings
     | 3,294 views

    One traditional question Jewish children ask their father as part of the Passover dinner is "Ma Nishtana ha lei la haze," "Why is this NIGHT different than any other NIGHT." Dad then recounts the story of the Exodus. Comedian George Burns, who was Jewish, tells this joke: During one of my many ...read more

  • The Best Years Of My Life

    Contributed by Jim Blevins on May 14, 2009
    based on 1 rating
     | 2,157 views

    THE BEST YEARS OF MY LIFE Man at a seminar heard the following: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of another man's wife!" The crowd was shocked! Then he continued "My mother!" The crowd laughed and he finished the rest of his speech which held everyone's attention. The young ...read more

  • A Preacher Was At A Seminar And Heard The ...

    Contributed by Jim Blevins on May 16, 2009
     | 2,013 views

    A preacher was at a seminar and heard the following: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of another man’s wife!" The crowd was shocked! Then he continued "My mother!" The crowd laughed and he finished the rest of his speech which held everyone’s attention . The young preacher liked ...read more

  • Beer Commercials And Community

    Contributed by Andrew Chan on Jun 28, 2010
     | 2,564 views

    BEER COMMERCIALS AND COMMUNITY Beer commercials do not really sell beer. Have you seen how they really sell "living it up with others" or what Christians call "community"? Do they not sell good looking people partying with other good looking people? Even the losers in those commercials all of a ...read more

  • Enormously Gorgeous  PRO

    Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 22, 2007
    based on 3 ratings
     | 623 views

    ENORMOUSLY GORGEOUS My dad says I am ENORMOUSLY GORGEOUS. I wonder if I really am. To be ENORMOUSLY GORGEOUS... Sarah says you need to have beautiful, long, curly hair like she has. I don’t. To be ENORMOUSLY GORGEOUS... Justin says you must have perfectly straight white teeth like he has. I ...read more

  • Admirer Or Follower?  PRO

    Contributed by Ty Tamasaka on Jul 19, 2011
    based on 4 ratings
     | 5,034 views

    ADMIRER OR FOLLOWER? Recently I heard that in Scotland, a voluntary survey was given to law enforcement officers of their religious affiliations. That may not sound very interesting, but what caught my attention was that 8 of the officers claimed their religious affiliation to be "Jedi". I ...read more

  • Someone Tells About A Pastor Who Was Late For ...  PRO

    Contributed by Dana Chau on Jul 1, 2003
    based on 6 ratings
     | 1,818 views

    Someone tells about a pastor who was late for church. He flagged down a taxicab and instructed the cabdriver to do everything within his power to get him to church on time. So the cab sped off and weaved through traffic for about ten blocks. The dangerous driving ended in a fatal accident. Both ...read more

  • Clark Cothern, Decision, Tells Of A Personal ...  PRO

    Contributed by Dale Pilgrim on Oct 6, 2005
    based on 3 ratings
     | 2,677 views

    Clark Cothern, Decision, tells of a personal experience he had had. “I once invited a friend, Gavin, to help my pastor and me guide 30 lively teens through an all-night "lock-in" at church. Early in the evening Gavin challenged me to a game of table tennis in the fellowship hall. Our game quickly ...read more

  • Dying For Someone Like That

    Contributed by Curry Pikkaart on Aug 12, 2011
     | 2,369 views

    DYING FOR SOMEONE LIKE THAT During the war in Vietnam, a young West Point graduate was sent over to lead a group of new recruits into battle. He did his job well, trying his best to keep his recruits from ambush and death. But one night, when they had been under attack, he was unable to get one of ...read more

  • Loving Neighbour

    Contributed by Don Berry-Graham on Feb 29, 2016
     | 3,681 views

    A Little Pointer on Keeping a Balance Here’s a little bonus tip that I’ve found helpful to keep my wits about me as I live next to these wild Vikings we call sinners, pagans, and wacko unbelievers while keeping my vertical relationship with God strong. It’s called “whimsical holiness,” which is ...read more

  • Bad Day

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jul 23, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 4,679 views

    BAD DAY Brian Hise has had his share of bad stuff happen to him. In just a short time -- one day in July -- his apartment in Provo, Utah apartment became flooded because of an upstairs neighbor’s broken pipe. The manager instructed him to go out and rent a wet/dry vacuum. When he went out to his ...read more

  • As If I Didn’t Already Know

    Contributed by James Snyder on Oct 12, 2024
     | 169 views

    I've been accused of many things throughout my life, but never having a great memory. It's not that I don't try to remember things; I can't remember things I'm supposed to remember. It has nothing to do with my age because it started as far back as I can remember. This ...read more

  • Isn't It Strange?, Unknown Author, Submitted By ...  PRO

    Contributed by A. Todd Coget on Mar 8, 2002
    based on 13 ratings
     | 2,357 views

    [Isn’t it Strange?, unknown author, submitted by Jerry Pearcy] Isn’t it strange how a 20 dollar bill seems like such a large amount when you donate it to church, but such a small amount when you go shopping? Isn’t it strange how endless an hour seems when we are serving God, but how short it is ...read more

  • Zig Ziglar On Politicians  PRO

    Contributed by Sermon Central on Jul 2, 2002
    based on 8 ratings
     | 2,763 views

    Zig Ziglar On Politicians A "politician" has been described as a genius who can open the door of your car with one hand, help you in with the other, and still have one hand left to pat you on the back and ask for your vote. Yes, as the saying goes, at one time in America we told political jokes ...read more

  • There Were Very Few Of These <gilligan's Island> ...  PRO

    Contributed by Bill Huffhine on May 27, 2004
    based on 16 ratings
     | 4,808 views

    There were very few of these <Gilligan’s Island> episodes that you could consider emotionally touching. But I do remember one. Gilligan had gotten his feelings hurt and decided to move away to the other side of the Island to live alone in a cave. Immediately, this became a miserable existence ...read more

  • In A Recent Article Entitled "The Gym Of The ...

    Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on Feb 4, 2007
     | 1,568 views

    In a recent article entitled “The Gym of the Soul” on CitizenLink.com, there is a quote from someone who says, “No matter what, you can overcome your past. With help, if you look to God, you can overcome your past and be reborn.” But it was not a preacher who was quoted, rather it was someone you ...read more

  • We Have All Heard The "Good New!"..."Bad News!" ...

    Contributed by Byron Maynard on Apr 9, 2005
    based on 3 ratings
     | 18,724 views

    We have all heard the "Good New!"..."Bad News!" aphorisms. Here’s one with a little different twist. I have some "Bad News!...Good News!...Best News!" for you... The bad news, you are dying! It’s no joke, biologist tell us that every day, to some extent, each of us are dying...The cells and atoms ...read more

  • Tractor Pulls And Yokes

    Contributed by Sermon Central on May 13, 2013
    based on 1 rating
     | 6,894 views

    TRACTOR PULLS AND YOKES Some people like going to events called Tractor Pulls. This is when they cover the floor of an arena with dirt and guys in souped-up tractors compete to see who can pull the heaviest loads. That’s nothing new because long before the internal combustion engine, farmers were ...read more

  • The National Center For Fathering Conducts Father ...

    Contributed by Bobby Scobey on May 20, 2008
    based on 1 rating
     | 5,221 views

    The National Center for Fathering conducts Father of the Year Essay Contests in partnership with local schools and sponsoring organizations. In 2005, eight contests were held and altogether, over 100,000 school children submitted essays on the topic, "What My Father Means to Me." Below is a ...read more

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