Sermon Illustrations

91% of Americans have turkey for Dinner. And so... I was thinking about Butterball Turkeys for some reason I know not why. Did you know they have an online help page? Well I went to that computer page and I found some of the problems that people have with cooking turkeys. You may be flabbergasted at what I found. Here are just a few of them:

1. All in the Family

A woman in her seventies, cooking Thanksgiving dinner for the first time, called for help because her mother said it was time she learned how to prepare the Thanksgiving meal.

2. It’s a Wrap

A proud gentleman called to tell the staff how he wrapped his turkey in a towel, laid it in the floor and stomped on it breaking the bones so it would fit in his pan.

3. Carving the Turkey

Another gentleman called to tell the operator he cut his turkey in half with a chain saw and wanted to know if the oil from the chain would adversely affect the turkey.

4. Upside Down Turkey Surprise

A disappointed woman called wondering why her turkey had no breast meat. After a conversation with a Talk-Line operator, it became apparent that the woman’s turkey was lying upside down.

5. Keeping it Cooking

One mom called in and told the Help Line operator about how her little girl had asked if they could slow-roast the turkey for three or four days because she liked how it made the house smell. The experts at the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line told her that the turkey should only stay in the oven for a few hours and that it wasn’t a good idea to leave it cooking four days!

6. Turkey Treasure

After discovering a turkey from 1969 in his dad’s freezer, a man called the Talk-Line at Butterball to ask about the best way to cook the 30+ year-old bird. Although the Talk-Line staffer recommended the open roasting pan method to cook most turkeys, but this time she suggested that the first step was to purchase a fresher fowl!

7. State Bird

When a Talk-Line staffer asked a caller: “What state is your turkey in” (meaning how thawed was it) the caller responded with, “Florida.”

*Reference: http://www.rd.com/slideshows/funny-thanksgiving-help-line-calls/#ixzz3JRR6nTJS

Related Sermon Illustrations

  • Advice

    Contributed by Kenneth Anthony on Dec 31, 2006
    based on 1 rating
     | 6,796 views

    ADVICE A man was on the practice golf course when the club pro brought another man out for a lesson. The pro watched the fellow swing several times and started making suggestions for improvement, but each time the pupil interrupted with his own version of what was wrong and how to correct it. ...read more

  • A Young Boy About Seven Years Old Went To ...  PRO

    Contributed by Kenneth Anthony on Dec 31, 2006
    based on 6 ratings
     | 4,863 views

    A young boy about seven years old went to Disneyland with his family, but in the excitement of going on all the rides, he was separated from them. He was having such a wonderful time that it was quite a while before he realized that he was lost. When he discovered the predicament he was in, he at ...read more

  • There's A Poem By Joseph Addison Alexander That I ...  PRO

    Contributed by Bruce Willis on Jan 1, 2007
    based on 5 ratings
     | 3,788 views

    There’s a poem by Joseph Addison Alexander that I believe drives home the urgency for someone here today. It’s untitled to my knowledge and goes like this: There is a time, we know not when, A place, we know not where; Which marks the destiny of men To glory or despair. There is a line, ...read more

  • When I Took My First Church As A Pastor Fresh Out ...

    Contributed by Michael Mccartney on Jan 25, 2007
    based on 1 rating
     | 1,671 views

    When I took my first church as a pastor fresh out of Bible College. I visited with a man who frequently attended the church. When I met with him to talk about the church and my new leadership he asked a request of me. He said, “If you agree with the following then I will continue to attend the ...read more

  • Billy Graham Stated, "One Of The Greatest Sins ...  PRO

    Contributed by Michael Mccartney on Jan 25, 2007
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,583 views

    Billy Graham stated, “One of the greatest sins in America today is the fact that we are robbing God of that which rightfully belongs to Him. When we don’t tithe, we shirk a just debt. Actually we are not giving when we give God one-tenth, for it belongs to Him already (Lev. 27:30). This is a debt ...read more

Related Sermons