Sermon Illustrations

There are sayings about every thing these days. Here are some that may cause you to smile and some may even make you laugh.

When all else fails, lower your standards.

I don’t know, I don’t care, and it doesn’t make any difference.

I don’t have any solution but I certainly admire the problem.

My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.

If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.

When things just can’t get any worse, they will.

Anytime things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something.

Laugh at your problems, everyone else does.

It’s bad luck to be superstitious.

Everybody is somebody else’s weirdo.

According to my best recollection, I don’t remember.

Plagiarism is copying from one source; research is copying from two or more.

When a person is dying the words they udder are captured and can whole a lot of meaning.

Roman Emperor Augustus:

"Did I play my role well? If so, then applause… "

Stonewall Jackson

"Let us pass over the river, and rest under the shade of the trees."

Isaac Newton, great Christian Scientist,

"I don’t know what I may seem to the world. But as to myself I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the seashore and diverting myself now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than the ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me.

Leonardo da Vinci:

Italian inventor and artist, died in 1519

"I have offended God and mankind because my work did not reach the quality it should have"

Churchill:

English Statesman - He said this at his death bed:

"What a fool I have been"

Ludwig von Beethoven:

"Friends applaud, the comedy is over."

John Newton b. 1725. d. 1807.

Originally a slaver, he had a dramatic mid-ocean change of heart that led him to turn his slave ship around and take the people back to their homeland. He became a Methodist then he pastored Presbyterian & Baptist Churches and preached against the slave-trade. He is most famous for having authored the words to the hymn "Amazing Grace".

As he neared his end, exclaimed, "I am still in the land of the dying; I shall be in the land of the living soon."

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