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Summary: Men and women: Yes we can understand each other.

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Understanding Women, Understanding Men (Part 1)

Ephesians 5:22-33

Sermon by Rick Crandall

Preached at McClendon Baptist Church

West Monroe, LA

Nov. 6, 2005

*Men & women are different!

-Take shoes for example.

*I did a little survey this week, asking men & women how many pairs of shoes they have.

-Men: 3 to 5.

-Women: 20 to 25.

*Men & women are different!

-So can we understand each other?

-Oh yes we can!

*But if we really want to understand men & women, then we have to take a look at the Book & follow God’s plan.

1. When we do, the first thing we see is that God calls wives to submissive love.

-(God shows us this in vs. 22-24)

*Over the course of history, this is probably one of the most abused verses of Scripture.

-Misused to take advantage of women

-Misused to browbeat & belittle them

-Misused by men who try to hide behind this verse in order to justify their bad behavior

*Verse 22 is one of the most abused verses of Scripture, but today it is also one of the most unused verses of Scripture.

-Many women have never stopped to consider why God tells wives to do this.

*Well, it’s not because men are better than women.

-In fact, we men need to take a big step up to be all that God intended us to be, but God does call wives to submissive love.

*One of the main reasons why is because God created men with a built in need to be respected. -Men respond to respect.

*All things being equal, it motivates us, it charges us up, it challenges us & helps us to be the men we were created to be.

--It helps us be the husband you want us to be.

*Ladies, think about the times your husband gets upset.

-Maybe he’s right, or even if he’s wrong, think about it.

-Go below the surface & see if he is upset because he feels that his honor is threatened.

-That’s the problem a lot of times.

*So wives, honor your husbands, even though it can be a difficult job.

-When Anita Donihue taught in Auburn, WA, there was another teacher at the school named Foster.

-One day Mrs. Foster was having a real frustrating time with one of her first-grade boys.

*And she told the boy: “You’ve been doing irritating things all day today.

-These things are some of my pet peeves.

--Do you know what a pet peeve is?”

*That first-grader shook his head no, and Mrs. Foster said,

-“A pet peeve is the thing that irritates a person the most.

-Do you know what my pet peeve is?”

*The little boy thought about it & said:

-“Ummm... Mr. Foster?” (1)

2. Ladies, A lot of times we are your pet peeve, but God calls wives to submissive love, and He calls men to the Savior’s love.

-(We see this in vs. 25-29)

*When we read these verses men, there can be no doubt:

-God gives the greatest responsibility to us.

*We are to love our wives the way Jesus Christ loves us. -Wow!

*That means we are to have a love that’s sacrificial.

-Jesus Christ gave His life on the Cross for us.

-He made the ultimate sacrifice for us.

--And that is the kind of love He wants you to have for your wife.

*Love her with a sacrificial, giving love.

-And there is a whole lot more to say about this next time, but tonight I want you to understand a little about why.

*Just like God created men with a built-in need for respect, He created women with a built-in need to be loved.

-And women generally respond to this love.

--It motivates her to be the wife you want her to be.

*Now, of course, these are not 100% one-way streets.

-Women also need respect and men also need love.

*But men & women are different.

-Men have a deep need for respect.

-Women have a deep need for love.

*In vs. 26& 27, we see the Lord doing great things for the church.

-He is taking care of the church, and God wants us to take care of our wives the same way.

*Our wives want us to take care of them.

-I know this because of the conversation you have every time you go out to eat.

*You say: -“Where do you want to eat?”

*And she says something like:

-“Oh, I don’t care.”

--Or: “It doesn’t matter.”

*But it really does matter doesn’t it?

-Then why does she want you to pick?

*It’s a small, subconscious way of her telling you,

-“I want you to take care of me.

--I want you to love me.”

*That’s the way God made her.

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