To Die For? Series

Early this past week I had a both disturbing and thought-provoking conversation with a young lady.

She told me about an experience she had had at a significant social event recently. She had run into to a couple who were old friends at this social event, and they had formerly been her spiritual leaders in a Christian ministry for four years. She had initiated with each of them individually during a social time after the major event and had a disappointing experience with each of them. She attempted to make conversation with the husband and was in the middle of this conversation when he suddenly became distracted and walked away, without saying a word, while she was practically in mid-sentence, without excusing himself. And as she attempted to greet the wife, the wife urged her little boy to say hi to her, and then became so distracted with her children, she forgot to say hi to this young lady herself.

And I guess all of that is excusable and forgivable. I imagine that from one time to another many of us do those sort of things, except that these two experiences actually epitomized this young lady entire experience with these two former spiritual leaders of hers.

She had been quiet, and a bit socially awkward especially during the early years of her involvement in this ministry and had somewhat blamed herself for her loneliness while involved with the group. She had sought to initiate with various people, but they hadn’t been interested for the most part. As for this leadership couple, they seemed to focus on the in-crowd, the more social and easy-to-talk-to kids, who seemed to be their favorites. When this young lady finally did get up the courage to talk to one of the leaders about leaving her out, the wife had replied that she just naturally moved toward where the action was, and she was sorry that the young lady had felt that way, but nothing ever changed.

Finally, the ministry dwindled from 40 to 50 peopled until about only 7 or 8 were involved, and my young friend noted that the reason for this is that the favored people, the people the ministry couple favored, ended up moving on to other opportunities, while she, who had been largely neglected and ignored, had remained faithful to the ministry. Finally, the ministry closed without this young lady ever having gained some of what she had hoped from the ministry couple—a personal relationship.

Finally, she came to a conclusion. This couple was accustomed to being the center of attention, and so even when she had confronted them, even when she had remained faithful when many of the more socially comfortable folks had not, they just never got it when it came to her. They just never understood that they weren’t meeting her needs, and it wasn’t okay.

It’s a sad story indeed. And I wonder how often it’s repeated in churches of Christian ministries. I wonder how often we become insensitive to the needs of others who are quiet, or perhaps not as easy-relate-to as others.

And I wonder if I’m every guilty of doing the same thing.

But there’s one thing I really don’t wonder about. And that’s how Jesus feels about it. and what Jesus expects. Because he repeatedly lays it out in His Word. And one those places where Jesus lays out what He expects is found in the passage before us this morning.

Again, it’s Jesus’ final night with his disciples before His crucifixion—a fact we have mentioned each time we’ve brought the message since we’ve been in John 13-17, because it’s an extremely significant factor. What Jesus says in the last intimate moments of his ministry with these disciples are among the most significant things he would ever tell them. And once again, for at least the second time during this evening, he speaks of the absolute importance, the top priority of how the disciples, and how Christians are to relate to one another. We cannot ignore each other; we cannot just pick and chose whom we love. There is a command, an obligation, which it is absolutely necessary for us to fulfill if we would fulfill God’s will and His ministry for us—and that is to love one another as Jesus has loved us—and even to the point of death if necessary. Even to the fullest extent necessary. And if we were all busy about this sort of thing, there wouldn’t be people falling through the cracks, there wouldn’t be loneliness and self-doubt to the degree we find it in our churches, there wouldn’t be people left out.

Now remember, last week, we talked about the Key to Everything in the Christian Life. We’re in the midst of the parable of the vine and the branches. And the key word in relationship to Christ for each of us is the word abide. If we abide in Christ, every blessing of our relationship to Christ is available to us—answered prayer, bearing fruit, glorifying the Father, becoming disciples. Abiding in Christ is the key to the Christian life, and we defined abiding in Christ as obeying Christ’s Word. Obeying Christ’s Word in the power of the Holy Spirit, the power of Christ. Now we come to the end of this parable, and the focus is on relationships with each other. And the key word is love. Loving one another. And it’s clear that the conclusion that Christ wants us to gather is this—if you abide and obey Christ you will love one another as Jesus has loved you. Not only that, you will love one another to the extent he loved us. You will give your life for one another.