Sermons on Jokes:

Good Friday At What Price?

Contributed by John Gullick on Mar 23, 2016

A Good Friday sermon that follows a Peter Marshall style format. follows Jesus Journey towards and on the cross

At What price There it was in all it’s rawness. The untidy rabble – mixture of religious bigots and the clatter of military steel mixed with the blind panic of Jesus followers – The lashing out of one to the ear of a soldier – the horror – the sheer curtain of fear ...read more

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

The Lord God Made Them All

Contributed by Roberta Karchner on May 18, 2019

At a pivotal moment, Peter discovered God loved those outside his inner circle. Who are we including or excluding?

Acts 11:1-18 The Lord God Made Them All – How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb? It depends upon which denomination you belong to. If you are Methodist, you are welcome no matter what the status of your bulb. You can be bright, dim, or completely burned out. You can be a light ...read more

Scripture: Acts 11:1-18

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

Wisdom And The Quality Of Your Life Series

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Jun 17, 2019

A wise person accepts and acts upon realities that others deny or ignore. The sooner we get these down, the better!

Wisdom and the Quality of Your Life (Proverbs 27:19-26) 1. Some people are amazingly shrewd. Take this joke: 2. Morris (the father) says to his son:“I want you to marry a girl of my choice.” The son says: I will choose my own bride.” Morris says:“But the girl is Bill Gates’daughter.” The son ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 27:19-26

Denomination: Independent/Bible

Free Lunch!

Contributed by Val Black on Nov 25, 2019

There are always claims of a "Free Lunch" but none of them prove to be true, with one exception. It's a real meal and it really is free.

(This is a sermonette and/or illustration, that was taken from one of our Gospel tracts. It could be considered tongue-in-cheek. It simply explains the Marriage Supper of the Lamb and how to qualify to participate in it.) Someone once said there is no such thing as a “free lunch.” There are ...read more

Scripture: Revelation 19:7-9, John 14:3, Matthew 22:1-14

Denomination: Charismatic

Realistic Reminders Series

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Nov 17, 2020

We need reminders to keep us realistic about human social behavior, about our tendency to accommodate our own sin, and about the nature of government leaders.

Realistic Reminders (Proverbs 28:11-16) 1. Everyone is forgetful at times. The difference is often this: some people remember they are absent-minded, others forget they are absent-minded. 2. One of my favorite original jokes is also true: I read a book about how to remember, but forgot what it ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 28:11-16

Denomination: Independent/Bible

A Savior Is Born Series

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Dec 28, 2018

The way Jesus came into the world and the events surrounding that first Christmas affirms so much of what we believe as Christians.

A Savior Is Born (Luke 2:1-20) 1. This is a true story. Freddie and John were fortunate enough to have a season ticket to watch Chelsea soccer in the UK. They could not help noticing that there was always a spare seat next (B14) to them and they had a friend who would love to buy a season ticket, ...read more

Scripture: Luke 2:1-20

Denomination: Independent/Bible

Building On The Rock

Contributed by Grant Adams on Jun 10, 2022

The question is not, “Will storms come in my life?” but, “Will the house prove to be storm worthy?”

Every man builds his house in the path of a storm. No matter who that man is, no matter what kind of house he builds, no matter where he builds it. The question is not, “Will storms come in my life?” but, “Will the house prove to be storm worthy?” The storm may not have hit yet, but just hang on it ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 7:21-29

Denomination: Baptist

Individualism And Making Holy Families Series

Contributed by W Pat Cunningham on Dec 26, 2021

Individualism, like most isms, is a philosophy of “me, first.” “I don’t care about anything or anybody but me.”

Homily for Feast of the Holy Family Sir 3: 2-7, 12-14; Psalm 127; Col 3: 12-21; Lk 2: 22-40 Version 2 (request that lector read the long version of Colossians) Is any English word so misunderstood today as the key word in Paul’s letter to the church of Colossae? No, I don’t mean the word ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 3:12-21, Luke 2:22-40, Malachi 2:16

Denomination: Catholic

Fifth Sunday In Ordinary Time, Year C: Fishers: The Call, Objection, Assurance, And Commissioning Stories

Contributed by Paul Andrew on Jan 8, 2025

“You got it bad and that ain’t good. But there is a doctor in the house and his name is Jesus."

Robert Coles, a Pulitzer Prize winner who taught at Harvard, believes that “the characters in novels can be persistent voices reminding us of the constant temptation toward egotism, and self-deception to which the mind is heir,’ and exhorting us to live lives that are morally inspired.”1 For ...read more

Scripture: Isaiah 6:1-8, Luke 5:1-11

Denomination: Catholic

When God Seems Slow

Contributed by David Dunn on Oct 25, 2025

When God seems slow, fear builds idols. Trust Jesus, who breaks our false gods and restores us to the only Savior worth waiting for.

Introduction — The Silence That Feels Dangerous They waited. Moses went up the mountain to talk with God. Israel watched him go until he was only a speck on the slope…and then he disappeared into the cloud of glory. The first day, there was awe. The third day, curiosity. By day ten…whispers. By ...read more

Scripture: Exodus 32:1, Exodus 32:6, Romans 12:2, Luke 23:34, 1 Corinthians 10:11  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Seventh-Day Adventist

Twenty-Second Sunday In Ordinary Time, Year B - Dirty Hands And Dirty Thoughts

Contributed by Paul Andrew on Jul 29, 2024

“Nothing ever happens in the world that does not first happen inside a mind...”

An illustration for those who deny the reality of concupiscence: A visitor was once being shown around an art gallery. The gallery contained some beautiful paintings which were universally acknowledged to be masterpieces. At the end of the tour the visitor said, "I don't think much of ...read more

Scripture: Philippians 4:8-9, Mark 7:1-23

Denomination: Catholic

What Must We Do To Be Restored?

Contributed by Chris Swanson on Feb 23, 2025

Zechariah hears from God and he learns that Judah will be blessed.

Jerusalem had fallen due to the sin that the people had allowed to come in. Not only was God jealous for Zion (the place) but also Zion (the people). God protects those He loves but He does allow things to happen to get His people back in line. God wants us to be faithful to Him and follow His ...read more

Scripture: Zechariah 8:1-23

Denomination: Independent/Bible

Communication

Contributed by Rev. Samuel Arimoro on Apr 16, 2025

Communication is one of the most powerful tools given to mankind. Through communication, relationships are built, ideas are conveyed, and destinies are shaped.

COMMUNICATION By Rev. Samuel Arimoro Main Text: Proverbs 18:21 – “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” Supporting Texts: James 3:1-12, Ephesians 4:29, Colossians 4:6, Matthew 12:36-37 INTRODUCTION: Communication is one of the most ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 18:21, James 3:1-12

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Sixth Sunday Of Easter, Year B- The Best Seller On Joy And Love

Contributed by Paul Andrew on Apr 3, 2024

The anointing with this oil causes our faces to be joyful and serene.

There is a joke that asks, “What do you call a book club that's been stuck on the same book for more than 2000 years?” [The answer] The Church. We have covered much of John’s Gospel in the last few weeks so that Joy and Love are the only new themes that emerge this Sunday. The most popular ...read more

Scripture: John 15:9-17

Denomination: Catholic

Thirty-Third Sunday In Ordinary Time, Year B: The End Of The World And Tender Branches

Contributed by Paul Andrew on Nov 1, 2024

The date of the end of the world cannot be known based on prophecy.

We are nearing the end of Ordinary Time as Advent draws near and so the theme this time of year is on the Second Coming of Christ at the end of the world. People are telling end of the world jokes like there is no tomorrow! E.g., A comedian spoke of a Pentecostal preacher who had predicted the end ...read more

Scripture: Mark 13:24-32

Denomination: Catholic