Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

Experience Complete Forgiveness Series

Contributed by Keith Manry on May 18, 2004

Part 2 of a series based on Mel Gibson’s film "The Passion of the Christ." Portions of this sermon were derived from sermons given by Sermon Central designed with the same intent.

Experience Complete Forgiveness John 8:1-11 Deadly – when you hear that adjective, certain phrases come to mind, like A deadly weapon, A deadly attack, A deadly snake, A deadly explosive, A deadly heart attack, A deadly enemy. Whatever connection you make with the word “deadly” it probably won’t ...read more

Scripture: John 8:1-11

Denomination: Methodist

Who Alone Is Immortal

Contributed by Harold Orndorff on May 24, 2004

Long ago C. H. Spurgeon said that the study of God would improve, humble, and expand the mind - a thesis we will test with an examination of 1 Tim 6:13-16.

“Who Alone Is Immortal” What better way to begin my sermon than by reading from a really good one! Here is a bit of one delivered on Jan. 7, 1855: “It has been said by someone that ‘the proper study of mankind is man.’. . . but I believe it is equally true that the proper study of God’s elect is ...read more

Scripture: 1 Timothy 6:13-16

Denomination: Independent/Bible

The Christian And Government #2 - Voting - What, Why, And Who! Series

Contributed by Brian La Croix on May 30, 2004

The importance of voting!

The Christian and Government #2 ¡V Voting: Why, What, and Who! Various Scriptures May 30, 2004 Introduction You have no doubt noticed by now that today¡¦s message is not about Memorial Day. So before I move on to our topic for today, let me say that I do not intend for anyone to think that I do ...read more

Scripture: Exodus 18:21

Denomination: Wesleyan

Nehemiah's Vision

Contributed by James May on Jan 7, 2004

Nehemiah had a vision and a call to do a work for God. He would let no one nor anything stand in his way. Through hardships, planning and perseverance the job was done and Israel had a home once again. God has not changed. Your dream and calling will c

NEHEMIAH’S VISION Nehemiah 2:11-20, "So I came to Jerusalem, and was there three days. And I arose in the night, I and some few men with me; neither told I any man what my God had put in my heart to do at Jerusalem: neither was there any beast with me, save the beast that I rode upon. And I went ...read more

Scripture: Nehemiah 2:11-20

Denomination: Independent/Bible

"Do You Want To Get Well?" Series

Contributed by Kevin Cummins on Jan 9, 2004

This sermon teaches us how to be made well by looking at the story of Jesus asking the man who had been an invalid for thirty-eight years, "Do you want to get well?"

“A father and son went fishing one summer day. While they were out in their boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, ‘Dad, how does this boat float?’ The father replied, ‘Don’t rightly know son.’ A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, ...read more

Scripture: John 5:1-9

Denomination: Church Of God

Encounter With A Blind Man Series

Contributed by Jason Cole on Feb 18, 2004

All of our spiritual eyes are blinded, but by God’s Amazing grace we can spiritually see.

“Jesus’ Encounter with a Blind Man” Introduction: Amazing Grace! How sweet the sound That saved a wretch like me I once was lost, but now am found Was blind, but now I see I believe that a person can suffer from blindness and still have 20/20 vision. I believe that person can see thing around ...read more

Scripture: John 9:1-15

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

What On Earth Am I Here For? Series

Contributed by Rodney Buchanan on Feb 22, 2004

1. Why am I alive? -- To be loved by God. 2. Does my life matter? -- I was made to last forever. 3. What is my purpose? -- To get to know God.

(Note: The outline and some of the content of this sermon are from Rick Warren’s Forty Days of Purpose material.) In the scripture we have read today, Paul is speaking to a group of Greek philosophers. Now these men were not atheists or agnostics. Neither were they anti-religious. In ...read more

Scripture: Acts 17:22-24

Denomination: Methodist

A Purpose Filled Love - Purpose Driven Life Series

Contributed by Jeff Strite on Nov 7, 2004

Many people down thru the ages have been "purpose driven"... but have failed to understand the most important part of what makes us a Christian. Do you know what might have been missing in their lives?

OPEN: A mother looked out a window and saw Johnny playing church with their three kittens. He had them lined up and was preaching to them. The mother turned around to do some work. A while later she heard meowing and scratching on the door. The cats were obviously upset and frightened. She ...read more

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 13:1-13

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Purpose Driven Worship - Purpose Driven Life Series

Contributed by Jeff Strite on Nov 14, 2004

Most of us think we have worshiped when we have felt the music has been uplifting and the sermon challenging... but Scripture seems to say something else. What do you think God believes is the mark of true worship?

OPEN: I love to collect stories, jokes and all kinds of odd information. As I was going through my files, I happened on the following oddities about how did we ended up with the measurements we now use as a society. • Inch – was based upon a King by the name of Edgar… and an inch was the distance ...read more

Scripture: Romans 12:1-8

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

An Intentional Witness Series

Contributed by Rob Culler on Mar 21, 2001

Fifth in a six-part series of living intentionally and not just letting life happen to you.

Living an Intentional Life: Witness INTRODUCTION: President Clinton was down in the swamps where he slipped away from the Secret Service and was out jogging long the scenic paths that crisscross the country. As he was jogging, he accidentally tripped and fell off a narrow bridge into the black, ...read more

Scripture: Colossians 4:2-6

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Building Community - Value One Another Series

Contributed by Alan Perkins on Apr 1, 2001

As we gain a right understanding of how much worth and value each person has, as we come to see each other the way God sees us, then we will gain an appreciation for one another that will strengthen love and build community.

This is the fifth and last message in our series on Building Community. In a society that is becoming increasingly fragmented, in which people seem more and more separated from one another, the church can be a refuge. More than a building, more than a Sunday morning meeting, more than an ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 4:16

Denomination: Baptist

All The Characters In This Play.

Contributed by Dr. Jerry Morrissey on Apr 2, 2001

Year C. Sunday of the Passion/Palm Sunday April 8th, 2001

Year C. Sunday of the Passion/Palm Sunday April 8th, 2001 Luke 23:1-49 Lord of the Lake Lutheran Church The Rev. Jerry Morrissey, Esq., Pastor e-mail: pastor@southshore.com web page: http://lordofthelake.org/ Heavenly Father empower each of us here at Lord of the Lake Lutheran Church to develop the ...read more

Scripture: Luke 23:1-49

Denomination: Lutheran

My Name Is Noah

Contributed by Jeff Strite on Feb 7, 2001

This is a 1st person re-enactment. It tells the story of the flood from a grandfatherly, though gruff Noah’s perspective.

(delivered in a gruff but loving manner of a dottery old man) My name is Noah, the son of Lamech, who was the son of Methusaleh, and he in turn was the son of Enoch… Now there was a man for you. Enoch. Walked with God he did. They say that one day he and God were out walking and God said: ...read more

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

A Portrait Of Fatherhood

Contributed by Melvin Newland on Feb 21, 2001

In these few verses we see a portrait of fatherhood that is worth examining. So let’s consider 5 wonderful traits a father needs today.

MELVIN NEWLAND, MINISTER RIDGE CHAPEL, KANSAS, OK (Revised: 2018) TEXT: 1 Thessalonians 2:7-12 A. Do you remember when men were men & you could tell it by looking, when women were the ones who wore earrings & makeup? Do you remember when men knew who they were & ...read more

Scripture: Luke 15:17-20, 1 Thessalonians 2:7-12

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

Elijah - Just Like Us!

Contributed by Melvin Newland on Feb 23, 2001

Elijah did some very extraordinary things. But James’ message is that Elijah was just an ordinary person, & that God can take ordinary people & accomplish extraordinary things.

MELVIN NEWLAND, MINISTER RIDGE CHAPEL, KANSAS, OK (Revised: 2017) TEXT: James 5:17; Malachi 4:5 6; 1 Kings 18:21,30; Rom 12:1-2 (NIV) James 5:17 says, "Elijah was a man just like us. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, & it did not rain ...read more

Scripture: Malachi 4:5-6, James 5:17, 1 Kings 18:21-30, Romans 12:1-2

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ