Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

Come Together--No Excuses

Contributed by Travis Hearn on Nov 27, 2013

A sermon emphasizing unity in the church.

(Band Plays and Sang “Come Together” by the Beatles to Set Up the Sermon) Today I’m starting a new series titled, “My But’s Too Big”. Turn to your neighbor and tell them, “MYYYY word, your buts big! Didn’t that just feel soooo good! Some of you ...read more

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 12:12-26

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Warning: Pride Will Destroy Your Life

Contributed by Eduardo Quintana on Mar 10, 2020

"Warning: pride will destroy your life". We live in a nation of NO FEAR. We’ve all seen the bumper stickers, we’ve all read the T-shirts. NO FEAR! It’s not just an American slogan. It’s an American state of mind.

"Warning: pride will destroy your life". We live in a nation of NO FEAR. We’ve all seen the bumper stickers, we’ve all read the T-shirts. NO FEAR! It’s not just an American slogan. It’s an American state of mind. I would have no problem with it being the slogan of or our military. I would ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 9:19-20, Matthew 23:12, Romans 1:30, 2 Timothy 3:2

Denomination: Evangelical/Non-Denominational

Jesus Simon And The Sinful Woman

Contributed by Claude Alexander on Aug 22, 2018

The uninvited guest at the dinner. Simon the Pharisee and the sinful woman.

Jesus, Simon and the sinful woman. Writing between a.d. 64 to 68, Luke, “the beloved Physician” (Col. 4:14), traveling companion of Paul on his second and third missionary journeys (see ‘we’ passages: Acts 16:10-17; 20:5-15; 21:1-18; 27:1-16) and “fellow worker” with Paul (Phlm 24), spent time in ...read more

Scripture: Luke 7:36-50

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Purity

Contributed by Jerry Flury on Sep 25, 2011

God says we’re to keep ourselves pure. To be pure means to be unmixed with any other matter, to be free anything that taints. God expects us to be holy – separated from anything that defiles. We’re to be like Him. We need pure minds, hands, and hearts.

Purity 1 Timothy 5:22 God says we are to keep ourselves pure. To be pure means to be unmixed with any other matter, to be free anything that would taint. God expects us to be holy – separated from anything that would defile us. We are to be like Him. We are to have pure minds, pure hands, and pure ...read more

Scripture: 1 Timothy 5:22

Denomination: Baptist

The Key To Freedom

Contributed by Glenn Pease on Mar 12, 2021

The more you read of the history of our nation the more you realize the heroes of our history were not gods come down to earth, but they were weak and fallible men. It was their dependence upon God that enabled them to declare their independence from tyranny.

The story I am about to tell is fiction, but it is funny and it has a point. After 38 years of marriage I thought I knew everything about Lavonne. But I discovered something new when we got back from our trip to Washington. I was putting things away and I was pushing something under her side of ...read more

Scripture: Judges 6:1-6

School Supplies

Contributed by Joseph Smith on Jun 17, 2003

Drama dialogue, written as if a conversation between Paul, a tribune, and a narrator, with "chorus" lines for the children of the congregation. Supplies we need for learning are a listening mind, a loving heart, and a desire to grow.

Narrator: I knew very little about the people of the Way, but I did know that everyone in Jerusalem was talking about one of their leaders. We were all most upset about Paul. You see, Paul – actually we knew his name as Saul – Paul had been such a mighty force in our community only a few short ...read more

Denomination: Baptist

One Of You Will Betray Me

Contributed by Juan Lane on Aug 7, 2005

Describes how no one at the table can deny the fact that they have the potential to betray Christ

One of You Will Betray Me by Juan Lane Matthew 26:21-26:22 (KJV) 21 And as they did eat, he said, Verily I say unto you, that one of you shall betray me. 22 And they were exceeding sorrowful, and began every one of them to say unto him, Lord, is it I? One of you will betray me Betray - ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 26:21-22, Psalm 41:9

Denomination: Pentecostal

Handing Over The Keys

Contributed by Mari Larson on Sep 7, 2014

The authority to forgive (The Office of the Keys) has been given to us, but we don't use it.

Church life on the prairies of the Midwest is often quite different from church life here (in Arizona). Small congregations of Norwegian, Swedish, Danish, Finnish, and German origins are slowly dying out, and since we no longer preach in the languages of our mother-lands (Thank God!), and because ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 18:15-20

Denomination: Lutheran

The Fruit Of The Spirit Series

Contributed by Gordon Curley on Nov 27, 2010

The Fruit of the Spirit (PowerPoint slides to accompany this talk are available on request - email: gcurley@gcurley.info)

Reading: Galatians chapter 5 verses 16-25. Ill: • The year was 1934. • An impoverished prospector named Jacobus Jonker, • Walked across his small farm in South Africa. • The recent heavy rains had washed away loads of silt, • And he searched tirelessly for any small treasures the torrents might ...read more

Scripture: Galatians 5:16-25

Denomination: Brethren

Grow At Gbc Through Fellowship (2019 V.) Series

Contributed by Chuck Sligh on Feb 2, 2019

We are saved to be in fellowship (community) with other believers. This sermon encourages God's people to be committed to greater relational and service involvement in their "community of faith."

Grow at GBC Through Fellowship Series: Get on the Ship Chuck Sligh January 27, 2019 Blurb: We are saved to be in fellowship (community) with other believers. This Sunday, worship with us and hear Pastor Sligh explain what results when we are committed to fellowship with a local community of ...read more

Scripture: Acts 2:42-47, Hebrews 10:25, Ecclesiastes 4:9, Psalm 61:2-5, Ephesians 4:12-13, Ephesians 3:10, Hebrews 3:13  (view more)  (view less)

Denomination: Baptist

Baptized!

Contributed by Scott Carmer on Jan 9, 2006

Baptism means that we have been forgiven, cleansed, healed, initiated into God’s family, and set on a mission.

Baptized! Mark 1:4-11 Baptism of our Lord January 8, 2006 Toni and I moved to Denver, Colorado in the late summer of 1977 in order to get settled in for the beginning of my first year of seminary. From our student housing unit, you only had to look west to see three of the fourteen thousand foot ...read more

Scripture: Mark 1:4-11

Denomination: Methodist

The Pursuit Of Purity

Contributed by Matt Skiles on Jun 10, 2021

God says we are to keep ourselves pure. God expects us to be holy – separated from anything that would defile us. We are to be like Him.

1 Timothy 4:12-Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity. 1 Timothy 5:22-Lay hands suddenly on no man, neither be partaker of other men’s sins: keep thyself pure. Christian believers are called to ...read more

Scripture: 1 Timothy 5:22

Denomination: Pentecostal

Gaining Your Bearings In Life Series

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Jul 4, 2011

Careful: Many of life's blessings can be enjoyed, but they carry with them the potential to work against you.

Gaining Your Bearings in Life (Proverbs 18:20-24) 1. I was told that I had used the joke from last week's sermon just 4 weeks earlier, about the 2 Jews, the 2 Catholics, and the 2 Baptists stranded on an island. Oops. 2. So, to redeem myself, I will tell one only about two Jews stranded on an ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 18:20-24

Denomination: Independent/Bible

A Living Faith!

Contributed by Dewayne Gamez on Dec 11, 2004

A continuation of a study in faith

A Living Faith Hebrews 11:21-22 James 2:17-26 Abel. Enoch. Noah. Abraham. Isaac. Joseph. Can you tell me what they all have in common? They were all listed in the faith chapter as men of faith. They all showed their faith in God when he gave them directives. Some were pretty drastic directives, ...read more

Scripture: James 2:17-26

He That Reapeth

Contributed by Evie Megginson on Oct 18, 2000

Years ago, in a small town in Texas, a German mer-chant and his entire family came forward at the close of a service to receive Christ as Savior and Lord.

Years ago, in a small town in Texas, a German mer-chant and his entire family came forward at the close of a service to receive Christ as Savior and Lord. When the pastor asked him to tell his experience, this is what he said. "Yesterday I closed my store early and went for a ride with my family. ...read more

Scripture: Psalm 126:5-6

Denomination: Baptist