Sermons on Dirty Jokes:

Avoiding The Ditch

Contributed by John Williams Iii on Mar 2, 2021

We usually tend to think of stories having a good guy and a bad guy. The good guy is always the hero and the bad guy is always the villain. This story adds a third dimension that makes us uncomfortable which is the indifferent category. This sermon is about avoiding the pain of others.

AVOIDING THE DITCH (July 25, 2012) Text: Luke 10:30 -35 Luke 10:30-35  Jesus replied, "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell into the hands of robbers, who stripped him, beat him, and went away, leaving him half dead.  (31)  Now by chance a priest was going ...read more

Scripture: Luke 10:30-35

Denomination: United Methodist

Making Light Of Sin Series

Contributed by Daniel Devilder on Dec 3, 2006

Sin is not just a problem for non Christians, but also for those who are called "children of Light." This text highlights the transforming nature of the light of Jesus as we let it expose our sin.

Making Light of Sin Ephesians 5:2-14 Introduction A man and his wife were shopping at a mall and a pretty young woman. The man’s eyes followed her. Without looking up from the item she was examining, his wife asked, "Was it worth the trouble you’re in?" This little joke makes us laugh in part ...read more

Scripture: Ephesians 5:1-14

Denomination: Christian/Church Of Christ

An Empty Tomb?- So What?! Series

Contributed by Ewen Huffman on Apr 9, 2004

A one hour All Age Easter Day Celebration service looking at the empty tomb (and who might have ahd the body etc). Email me for Word Dct of this (that has formatting etc) and PowerPoint presentations.

Easter Day AAW 11 April 2004, WBC, 10am SongPro background. Props: ropes, tent, parts to play, cue disciples, shroud, grow bags “N” signifies next item in Songpro for projector (song or powerpoint) PPT 1 – page 1 comes in automatically “AN EMPTY TOMB?- SO WHAT?!” 10am Introduction: -David ...read more

Scripture: John 20:10-18

Denomination: Baptist

"Contemplating The Burial: The Basic Facts" Series

Contributed by Ed Vasicek on Mar 31, 2003

There is a lot of teaching about WHY Christ died in the Scripture. There is a fair amount of teaching about the Resurrection. But the burial of Christ occupies a lesser role. Even so, keep in mind that it is one third of the Gospel. Although the Bible

"Contemplating the Burial: The Basic Facts" (John 19:31-42, Mark 15:42-47, Luke 23:50-56) 1. A man who died in 1997 has received a telephone bill from Sprint at his current abode -- the Hillside Cemetery in Auburn, Mass. "Our clients here don’t usually get mail," said superintendent Wayne ...read more

Scripture: John 19:31-42, Mark 15:42-47

Denomination: Independent/Bible

The Gift Of The Son Series

Contributed by John Knight on May 2, 2002

Fourth in series. The gift of the Son of God.

The Gift of the Son John 8:42-47 Have you ever been insulted? I. Insults Blond Joke Insults can be hurtful, or funny -depends upon the delivery "You’re so fat each step you take registers on the Richter scale." *hurtful/ harmful But, when overweight individual gets on stage and pokes ...read more

Scripture: John 8:42-47

Denomination: Holiness

Words - Toxic Talk

Contributed by Howard Mcglamery on Dec 12, 2002

A message to Singles on how words can either heal or hurt in relationships and in life.

Words - Toxic Talk Prov. 12:18 and 15:1 Introduction Suppose a grocer takes inventory of his store. Buried in the bottom of his meat section he finds a package of "over ripe" hamburger. It had somehow set there for weeks turning green. What should he do with the rotting meat? He should get rid of ...read more

Scripture: Proverbs 12:18, Proverbs 15:1

Denomination: Baptist

Looking Back, The Benefit Of Memory Series

Contributed by Donovan Myers on Jun 14, 2007

We can learn from the past

As you move on in age, one the most noticeable failing is your memory. And speaking of memory¡K Not too long ago a large seminar was held for ministers in training. Among the speakers were many well-known motivational speakers. One such boldly approached the pulpit and, gathering the entire ...read more

Scripture: Jude 1:5-16

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

Words Are Killers!

Contributed by Donnie De Loney on Nov 15, 2014

A message to Singles on how words can either heal or hurt in relationships and in life.

Words are Killers! Prov. 12:18 and 15:1 Introduction Suppose a grocer was looking into his meat cooler and at the bottom finds 2 packages of hamburger meet that was so rotten that they had turned green. What should he do with the rotting meat? He should get rid of it immediately and make sure he ...read more

Denomination: Assembly Of God

Agents Of Grace

Contributed by Mary Erickson on Jul 3, 2023

A sermon for the Sundays following Pentecost, Year A, Lectionary 13

July 2, 2023 Rev. Mary Erickson Hope Lutheran Church Matthew 10:40-42 Agents of Grace Friends, may grace and peace be yours in abundance in the knowledge of God and Christ Jesus our Lord. I’ve always been a fan of good news - bad news jokes: One day, the Pope’s assistant urgently approached ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 10:40-42

Denomination: Lutheran

Dealing With Daily Dirt Series

Contributed by David Welch on May 9, 2018

Message 25 in our journey through John's gospel exploring the lesson of foot washing.

Alliance Church Pastor David Welch “Dealing with Daily Dirt” Introduction We now enter the private teaching and ministry of Jesus to his disciples that run 13-17 with chapter 17 actually an intimate intercessory prayer – the real Lord’s Prayer in 17. Jesus addresses nearly every vital teaching ...read more

Denomination: Christian Missionary Alliance

Achieving Greatness God's Way

Contributed by William Baeta on Oct 23, 2003

“Whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave – just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many” Matt 20:26-28.

Theme: Achieving greatness God’s way Text: Ex. 12:21-28; Matt. 20:20-28 The purpose for Christ’s coming to earth is contained in the statement, “The Son of man came to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many”. God, our Creator, who is to be worshipped, came to serve as an example for us to ...read more

Scripture: Matthew 20:20-28, Exodus 12:21-28

Denomination: Presbyterian/Reformed

Story Of The Manger Series

Contributed by Ryan Loyd on Jul 25, 2014

Character Series designed to look at some of the stories that surround the birth of our Savior.

Christmas Stories: All of these people played a part in the larger story... I want to play a part in what God is doing These stories were given to us for an example... Take a look at some of the stories that surround the birth of our Savior... Text: Luke 2:1-7 1 And it came to pass in those ...read more

Scripture: Luke 2:1-7

Denomination: Pentecostal

Timothy…what It Will Take For God To Use You!

Contributed by Dr. Odell Belger on Mar 28, 2022

Most of us refer to ourselves as being “NORMAL.”

It must be nice in this life when someone can be more than a NORMAL PERSON and become an “EXCEPTIONAL” PERSON. That is, when normal people die the preachers who do the eulogy can pretty much sum up their entire lives in 15 to 30 minutes. When the funeral is finished the family and friends can ...read more

Scripture: 2 Timothy 2:2-26

Denomination: Baptist

A Great Man A Leper/A Successful Man A Sinner

Contributed by Tommy Ellis on May 10, 2002

Sermon compares the spiritual journey of Naaman with that of modern men who would come to God.

A GREAT MAN . . . A LEPER A SUCCESSFUL MAN . . . A SINNER 2 Kings 5:1-14 What if I told you that you could be set free from this prison today, that you could have all the money, land, and possessions the world had to offer–but there would be one catch. You would be alone–there would be nobody ...read more

Scripture: 2 Kings 5:1-14

Denomination: Pentecostal

Be A Team Player

Contributed by Scottie Pitts on Jun 30, 2001

The church must practice good teamwork in order to be successful.

Are you a team player? In May, 1953, two men became the first in history to climb to the top of Mt. Everest; Edmund Hillary, a New Zealand beekeeper and explorer, and his Sherpa guide from Nepal, Tenzing Norgay. They reached the summit together and attained instant international fame. On the way ...read more

Scripture: Galatians 6:1-6

Denomination: Methodist