Pursue Reconciliation Series

appointment that is scheduled.

--It may be as simple as a gracious handshake or a one-line apology.

3. In other situations where the hurt has gone on for years, and the pain runs deeply, it may involve

sitting down and processing the situation together at great length.

a. The reconciliation effort should depend on the offense.

--There isn’t one pat formula to follow, so be wise, as it will be different in each circumstance.

b. The Bible warns us that we cannot be on good terms with God when we are on bad terms with

other people

--1 Jn. 4:20 – “If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who

does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.”

B. The problem is, we tend to like retaliation more than reconciliation.

1. Paul says in Ephesians 4:3, “Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of

peace.”

2. When Jesus says, “Go, be reconciled”, it is literally a personal commandment to you.

a. It’s not a collective commandment to a group.

--He says it in a way where it is spoken just to you: You reconcile with that person.

b. Understand that you need to do it.

--The starting point for reconciliation is you!

c. Someone: “Resentment is me setting myself on fire in hopes that the smoke will bother you.”

1). You see what happens is that when we harbor anger and when we hold judgment over other

people it doesn’t hold them hostage.

--It hurts us!

2). Jesus said in Matthew 6:15; “But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive

your sins.”

C. Also understand that you can’t force reconciliation. It’s not something that you can cause to happen. It

takes two people for reconciliation to truly take place.

1. Romans 12:18: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

--There’s a disclaimer: “as far as it depends on you”

2. There will be some people that you cannot reconcile with, but your challenge and your

responsibility as a Christ follower who is distinctive and different is to make every effort you can

to reconcile.

--At that point it’s out of your hands.

D. Jesus also warns us to avoid lawsuits

--There’s a sense of urgency in Jesus’ statement: We might say, “Avoid lawsuits like the plague!”

1. Mt. 5:25 –26 – “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while

you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you

over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. I tell you the truth, you will not get out until

you have paid the last penny.”

2. Jesus’ warning is that we shouldn’t be surprised at what might happen if we don’t reconcile before

the case goes to court.

3. He’s basically telling us that it’s better if we head it off at the pass.

a. We should swallow our pride, make some concessions and don’t go that route.

b. Here’s why. 1 Cor. 6:1-4 – “If any of you has a dispute with another, dare he take it before the

ungodly for judgment instead of before the saints? Therefore, if you have disputes about such