FAMILY MATTERS
“Whatever happened to Father Knows Best?”
2nd Timothy 2:1-7
When I was growing up there were several television programs I enjoyed watching. My favorite was the Andy Griffith show. I had the opportunity a few years ago to actually meet Ron Howard who played the role of Opie. Ron Howard is now a very successful filmmaker in Hollywood. Our youngest son, Ross was working at a large Hotel in Tampa at that time while he was in college and Ron Howard checked in. So he set up a time with him for me to drive over and meet him in person.
I got 10-15 minutes to talk with him before breakfast that morning and among several questions I had for him, I asked him, “what was it like working on that show during those years” and he smiled and said two things….. (1) It was odd because he was so young and at that time the show came on around 8 or 9 o’clock, which was past his bedtime so his parents would never allow him to stay up late enough to watch it. (2) He also said that the whole experience was amazing because Andy Griffith became like a Dad to him and Andy had such high values that they rubbed off on him and it made him a better person. Much of the programming in those days had a positive influence on families I believe, rather than what we see today. One other was featured in the clip we just saw from the show, Father Knows Best. In that particular program there would be a problem typically that would arise within the family. Mom, dad and 3 kids and the problem would need to be addressed and it was always left to dad and in father Knows Bests he would always solve it. Every time. The show would close with the wife and kids all smiling and looking at their Father with adoration and respect. What Dad would not love that? It brings me to this question…whatever happened to Father knows best? Whatever happened to Dads that live a life that leaves a legacy their kids want to follow? Whatever happened to Dads being looked at with dignity and respect?
Now we live in a day when Dads are pictures on television as being uninvolved, aloof, men who don’t provide for their families and frankly just not very bright and most of us sit and laugh while others choose to model that behavior. It’s kind of funny but when it seeps over into real life, it’s not. When we emulate these kinds of actions we lose our ability to leave a good example of our children and grandchildren.
It is called leaving a legacy. All of us will leave one. Some for good. Some not so good. But at some point in life all of us must consider what kind of legacy we plan to leave behind when we are gone. Dads have to decide. Moms have to decide. All of us actually. So I’m asking you, what will your legacy be? One thing I think I know about all of us here this morning…is that we all have a desire to live a life that will stand for something and leave a legacy for others to follow. Children, grandchildren, friends. Because a wasted life is just not acceptable. Right? It’s not.
When Paul wrote this letter to Timothy it seems as though his thoughts were headed in this direction. Paul was nearing the end of his life when he wrote this letter. Later in this same letter he says, “The time has come for my departure. We have finished the race, I have kept the faith. He then says, now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness which the Lord the righteous judge will award to me on that day… and not only to me but also so all who have longed for his appearing.”
So let’s look at what Paul tells us…4 things we must consider if we plan to leave a godly legacy.
1st key. Consider the place of GRACE in your legacy. V. 1. Be strong in grace. Salvation is free. We receive this gift of God called salvation. It’s free. We do not work to be saved. We work because we are saved. Big difference. There is absolutely nothing we can do to earn God’s favor but I can tell you this…all of us want it, right? All of us want and need God’s favor in our lives.
Let me ask you a personal question. How did your Dad/Father impact your life? You can tell a lot about someone by the kind of Father they had. Fathers have a huge impact. Was your Dad a positive influence? Were you proud of him? Was he there when you needed him? Or was your Dad absent from the family? Were you perhaps embarrassed for who he was? I suspect that here today we could find examples of both. I happen to believe that dads have an enormous amount of pressure placed on them today. You see the role for Dads has really changed through the years. It used to be that Dads were simply the bread winner of the family, came home, ate and went to bed. They were tired. They worked hard and you know what? That was enough. Today, if all man does is work we say that he isn’t a very good father. I suspect that here today that we have a real variety in our backgrounds. As I said, some of both. But my point is this. Your father, good or bad had a profound influence in your life.
All of us have the ability to impact others. In a positive way or in a negative way. Think for a moment about whom the people are who have impacted your life the most. In fact make a list. List the people who have affected you for good. Male or female. Do it now. What did they have in common and that will tell you what your greatest need is. For me they ALL encouraged me. I will admit that is a deep need in my life. Not one of them was judgmental. All kind. And I am a better person as a result of knowing them. At different stages in my life God placed these people in my life and they were exactly what I needed. They offered grace to me and that really matters.
(2) Consider the powerful place of WORDS and how they will influence your legacy. Paul says this, “The things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses, entrust those things to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others.” V. 2.
This is exactly how leaving a legacy works. Paul teaches Timothy, Timothy then teaches others who are (1) reliable (2) dependable and (3) qualified to pass these things along to others. I believe that Jesus was very careful about who He chose to be His followers. That doesn’t mean they were perfect. One of them completely walked away from Jesus. The one He picked to be the leader denied him 3 times. But 11 stuck with Him and learned from Him and if not for their legacy we would not be here today. Can you imagine having a legacy like that? Ask yourself, who will be walking with the Lord, 20 years after I’m gone? Or 50 or 100 years or will our lives simply be forgotten? Men, our job is to teach our children and grandchildren so that they, in turn will do the same. The legacy Paul left is still intact 2000 years later.
Now how do we make this kind of impact? The answer is often found in the words we speak. James tells us that while the tongue is a small part of the body, it has great power. He compares the tongue to 3 things. (1) He compares it to a FIRE. (2) He compares it to a BIT we place in a horse’s mouth. (3) He compares it to a RUDDER on a ship. Now think of the power here. A small fire has the potential to cause huge damage. One spark can burn a forest down. That bit, while small can control a large horse and send him in the right direction or in the wrong direction. The rudder though very small can control a large ship and again it can be turned in a good direction or in a dangerous direction. It all depends on the captain, the one driving the boat. James goes on to say “with the tongue we praise our Lord and with it we also curse men.” It depends on how we use it but either way it has great power.
3rd Key. We must stay focused on the task before us. Vv.3-7. Let me ask you, are you focused? I believe it’s harder to be focused today than ever before. I read this week—this is as of Friday there are more than 4.5 billion web pages. There are now more active cellphones in the US than there are people. One more. FaceBook has over 200,000 pictures uploaded every ??? That is not total…that is every minute. It has become very difficult to stay focused. We live in the age of information but most of us would agree that it is really the age of misinformation. Whatever opinion you want on anything, for it or against it you can find it on the internet. Because of that focus becomes crucial. We can’t do everything; we can’t be involved in everything. So Paul gives us several models to follow.
(4) Consider some examples you should follow:
(1) a soldier. Listen to what he says, “no one serving as a soldier gets involved in civilian matters.” A soldier has one goal—here it is---to please his commanding officer. You see his opinion is the only one that really matters.
(2) an athlete. He says “he does not receive the victor’s crown unless he competes according to the rules. If an athlete fails to follow the rules he is then disqualified. Paul tells us that life is often like a race and that we must run that race with patience. We must get rid of anything that will trip us up in life---he says to lay aside every sin and to fix our eyes on Jesus because He is the author and the finisher of our faith.
(3) a farmer. Maybe you have raised a garden before. Not something I do but I have enjoyed things from several of you who have them. I understand it can be work. However it is another thing altogether to be a farmer who completely depends on the soil for his living. They plant and harvest but there is a lot more as well…they must till the soil, kill insects, disease that gets in the crops, worry about too much rain or too little rain, the wind…all of these are factors. So there are not many people who work harder than a farmer does, especially during the growing season. And if he doesn’t focus and really pay attention there will not be food on his table. However, if he does what he needs to do Paul says he should be the first one to receive a share of the crops.
(5) Consider the need for wisdom. V. 7. Proverbs 4:5-7. Dads need wisdom. Easy is not a word we would use today to describe the role Dads play in the family. The role of today’s dad is very complicated. Paul says reflect and pray on these things. Ask God to give you the insight/understanding you need. He says consider these individuals, the soldier who faces battle, the athlete who must train every day and the farmer who must patiently labor day after day that as we do we will see results. We will see these results in our own lives and we will see the difference they make in others. What do they share in common? Endurance, patience, hard work.
There is a book that I read that made the NY Times bestseller list that is titled “Tuesdays with Morrie.” It is the story of a man named Mitch and his former teacher whose name was Morrie. Mitch was a good student when he was in college but he was always concerned about how much money he was going to make when he left college. His entire focus was on material things that he would be able to get...a bigger house...a new car...he was driven to get as much as he could. Mitch was very fond of his professor Morrie and he always looked up to him in his college years but he lost track of him after he graduated…..he was simply too busy to keep up. But some things happened in his life and he needed to talk with someone one day and he really wanted to talk with Morrie.
To his surprise he learned that Morrie was still living in the area. So he began to go and visit Morrie every Tuesday and they would sit and talk. He learned that Morrie was dying. They met every Tuesday for fourteen weeks, until Morrie had taught Mitch the things he needed to know about life, finding himself, and truly living. They talked about regrets, death, family, emotions, the fear of aging, money, how love goes on, marriage, forgiveness. Morrie teaches Mitch that all of us sometimes get too wrapped up in our fast-paced world, with materialism… with things that really don’t matter in the long run and we often forget to stand back and just enjoy life. One Tuesday...arrived ...people coming and going in black. He assumed Morrie had died. When Morrie’s wife met him at the door he apologized that he did not know. His wife said well Morrie is still alive but that he always wanted to have a living funeral so that he would not have to wait until he was dead to be able to hear all the good things that would be said about him. What will be said about you after you are gone? It’s up to you.
