Mindset: Controlling Anger Series

Introduction

Opening Illustration

“Keep a sharp eye out for weeds of bitter discontent. A thistle or two gone to seed can ruin a whole garden in no time.” -Hebrews 12: 15

Max Lucado begins Chapter 11 (“Revenge Feels Good, But Then . . .”) of You’ll Get Through This with the story of businessman Joseph Richardson, who lived in New York City in 1882. He owned a narrow strip of land, 5 feet wide and 104 feet long, that fronted Lexington Avenue. Another businessman, Hyman Sarner, owned a normal-sized property adjacent to Mr. Richardson’s property. He intended to build apartments on that property and wanted to buy Mr. Richardson’s land, so that his apartment building windows would overlook the avenue. He offered Mr. Richardson $1000 for his land. Insulted, Mr. Richardson refused the offer. After Mr. Sarner’s building was completed, Mr. Richardson built a house on his narrow strip. Dubbed the “Spite House”, Mr. Richardson lived there the last 14 years of his life, his narrow house reflecting his narrow state of mind.

Pastor Lucado comments:

“Revenge builds a lonely house. Space enough for one person. The lives of its tenants are reduced to one goal: make someone miserable. They do. Themselves. . . . healing includes a move out of the house of spite, a shift away from the cramped world of grudge and toward spacious ways of grace, away from hardness and toward forgiveness. He (God) moves us forward by healing our past.”

From https://www.crownofcompassion.org/2013/10/21/the-spite-house/

1. Spite: a desire to hurt, annoy, or offend someone:

"he'd think I was saying it out of spite"

synonyms:

malice · maliciousness · ill will · ill feeling · spitefulness · bitterness ·

[more]

VERB

1. deliberately hurt, annoy, or offend (someone):

"he put the house up for sale to spite his family"

From Bing search

If you would turn in your Bibles to Genesis 4.

(Gen 4:1) Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, and said, "I have acquired a man from the LORD." (Gen 4:2) Then she bore again, this time his brother Abel. Now Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground. (Gen 4:3) And in the process of time it came to pass that Cain brought an offering of the fruit of the ground to the LORD. (Gen 4:4) Abel also brought of the firstborn of his flock and of their fat. And the LORD respected Abel and his offering,

(Gen 4:5) but He did not respect Cain and his offering.

Why?

There is a noticeable difference between the sacrifice of Cain and Able.

1) It was a matter of faith

Whereas Abel’s sacrifice was a sacrifice of faith Cain’s was not.

The Bible says of Abel’s offering that it was “the firstlings of his flock and the fat thereof.” Abel’s offering was of the first of the flock but not just of the first but it was of the best of the first. It was the best he had. You could say the best of the best. He knew God and wanted to give him his best. The thing about Abel’s sacrifice was that it was something close to his heart. Able had raise this sacrifice since it was a lamb. He had delivered it and watched it grow. This was something close to his heart yet he still gave it up as a sacrifice.

Of Cain’s offering the Bible reads, “Cain brought of the first of the ground and offering unto the Lord.” It would seem as the wording states that Cain brought what he felt to give to the Lord. Maybe he felt the Lord did need his prime tomatoes and potatoes. I mean all he did was burn them anyway. Maybe he felt it would be a waste.

And with this came the loss of respect for his sacrifice.

Some people are like Cain. They don’t trust the Lord enough to give him their best. They figure they could get more for their best than the Lord could.

2) It was a matter of attitude.

Abel’s attitude was, “give his best to the Lord and the Lord will always give his best back”.

With what Cain gave to the Lord we see that his attitude was not right. His attitude was not to the Lord but to himself. I don’t care if he would have given him the best of what he had

3) It was a matter of humility, forgiveness of sins.

(Heb 11:4) By faith Abel offered to God a more excellent sacrifice than Cain, through which he obtained witness that he was righteous, God testifying of his gifts; and through it he being dead still speaks.

Not as Cain, who was of that wicked one, and slew his brother. And wherefore slew he him? Because his own works (actions) were evil, and his brother's righteous. (1 John 3:12 AV)