Living With Your Spouse Series

Fireproof: Living With Your Spouse

From a message preached by Scott Kallem, Pastor of 3rd Baptist in Marion, IL

1 Peter 3:1-7

June 14, 2009 FBC, Chester Dr. Mike Fogerson, Speaker

Introduction

A Clip #3

B Marriage starts out as a romantic sleigh ride on a moonlit night, smoothly riding over the fresh snow. It’s living together after the honeymoon that’s the rough ride.

1 Although we’ll be in 1 Peter 3 today, understand he is continuing a thought from chapter 2.

a He had told his readers how citizens were to respond to an unjust king; slaves to unjust masters; & how Christ responded to His accusers.

b Key verse: 2:13 Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority...1 Peter 2:13 (NASB) “Submit yourselves” attitude

aa Hard, because we don’t like to give in!

bb The vast majority of problems in marriages (& church) is lack of submission (& abundance of pride).

2 Peter bridges into another area where submission is the key attitude, & that’s marriage.

a In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;6 just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.7 You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:1-7 (NASB)

b God has a blueprint for every marriage to follow, & each characteristic of the blueprint must be undertaken to have a God-honoring, God-guided marriage.

3 Let’s look at what these characteristics are as you discover about living with your spouse.

4 Pray

I Three essential characteristics for the wife to display:

A Be submissive in your approach (v. 1-2): In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.

1 In the New Testament, submission was either compulsory or voluntary, & the verb does not immediately carry with it the thought of obedience.

a Submission is a voluntary unselfishness; seeking the highest good for your groom.

b Why? “So that...” (V. 1)

aa You’ll have a godly impact on an unbelieving husband, & believing husbands who are behaving like unbelieving ones.

bb Even though these husbands act stubborn, irresponsible, irritable, & tough to live with...they aren’t blind (v. 2: “as they observe”).

2 They are seeing the application of the Word of God in your life.

a You are not responsible for how your husband responds, you’re responsible for being obedient to God’s Word.

b I’ve seen lost men come to Christ because of their wives’ faithfulness to God.

B Be modest in your appearance (v. 3-5): Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands...

1 Peter adds an interesting twist in the marriage blueprint with “adornment”.

a Adornment (Greek-kosmos: world, space, universe, & all the beauty in it) is the physical appearance of the woman.

aa Ladies, he’s not saying not to wear jewelry, fashionable clothes, or have stylish haircuts & makeup.

bb He’s saying, I believe, how you dress sends a message about your marriage.

b What is the message you’re wearing?

aa (V. 4): but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. “Imperishable quality (divine, incorruptible, look like Jesus), gentle (meek), & quiet (still, peaceful spirit) WHICH is precious in the sight of God.”