In Christ, I Am...a Bridge Builder Series

IN CHRIST, I AM…A BRIDGE-BUILDER—Ephesians 2:11-22

(Series on Ephesians: In Christ, I Am…)

My wife and I retired in Texas a few months ago, and we found ourselves, for the first time in our marriage, looking for a church to call home. We were looking beyond the friendly greeters holding the door open for worship, so we visited Sunday School classes, wondering how we would fit in. We were surprised when we felt like outsiders: not from Texas, not from the same denomination, not of the same age, not from the same neighborhood, or not with a history in that particular church. On our second visit to one class, we heard, “I’m surprised you came back. We are a rather closed group, because we have known each other so long, and we know everything about each other.”

Our experience makes me wonder how many people feel the same way in church, even after attending for quite some time. The initial friendliness has worn off, and they are wondering whether they really fit into the church fellowship.

Today, we are going to think about WHY it is difficult for people to be assimilated into the church, and HOW to build bridges between people.

Read Ephesians 2:11-22.

WHY is it difficult for people to fit in?

1. We might think some people are not worthy of being in our group.

***Kevin had a hard time fitting into the church. It wasn’t just the fact that he was a drug addict, which he was. It wasn’t just the fact that he did not have a lot of money, while many people in the church had much more. The biggest thing, he said, was that so many men in the church were tall, and he was short. He lacked Dutch genes, as well as the advantages of many in our church.**

Read Ephesians 2:11-12. Gentiles had four strikes against them:

Gentile Christians were “gentiles by birth.” From an early age, some Jews were taught that gentiles were inferior. Some Jews even called them “gentile dogs.” Many Jews felt that gentiles were “not our kind of people,” and that close relationships with them should be avoided.

***Ollie and Lena were Norwegian immigrants. Ollie was proud of his heritage, and he would often say, “Lena and I—we hundred percent Norwegian.” (Preacher—do the accent if you can.) One day, Ollie comes to work, overflowing with happiness. He tells everyone, “Lena going to have baby! I hundred percent Norwegian, Lena hundred percent Norwegian, baby hundred percent Norwegian.” Every day is the same: “…baby hundred percent Norwegian.” One day Ollie comes to work, and he is so sad. He mopes all day long, until finally someone asks him what is wrong. Mournfully he says, “Lena go to the doctor. Doctor says Lena is going to have a Syrian.” (Preacher: If your people will not get the reference to Caesarian delivery, don’t use this!)**

Gentiles had been “excluded from citizenship in Israel.” There was a sign in the temple in Jerusalem that said, “No foreigner is allowed to enter [and if one does, he is]…responsible for his ensuing death.”

Gentiles had been “foreigners to the covenants of the promise.” This went beyond prejudice; God chose the Jews to be included in his covenant, and non-Jews were included rarely, as foreigners. (Jesus and the coming of the Holy Spirit upon gentiles in Acts changed all that.)

Gentiles had been “without hope and without God in the world.” There really was something missing in their lives, before they came to Christ.

Some people might seem to us to be less worthy of being part of God’s church. Maybe we think they are not good enough, or not nice enough, or not attractive enough. Maybe we feel, although we would not admit it, that they don’t make our group as cool as we would like to think we are. Some people have “issues”: They are insecure, they monopolize conversations, they are abrasive, or they lack social skills.

2. We have difficulty connecting with some people.

Verse 19: “You are no longer foreigners and aliens.”

Some people literally are foreigners, or of other races or ethnic groups. Some are of different generations, or different social classes. Others don’t share many of our interests, so we find little to talk about. The differences are real, and it takes effort to build relationships.

Sometimes people in groups don’t want to make an effort to include others. If we have a circle of friends that is big enough to meet our needs for belonging, and small enough to be comfortable, there is little motivation to bring more people into the circle. People are excluded because they might change the dynamics of the group.

The result is that people don’t seem to fit in a group, because they don’t have natural connections with people, and no one is motivated to seek common ground, or to help them build connections.