Homework For Husbands Series

Series: For Better or For Worse Pt. 5

"Homework for Husbands"

Ephesians 5:22-33, 6:4

Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

INTRODUCTION:

I. A DISTINCTIVE ROLE -- verse 23

a. The Divine Origin of the Home

Gen 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

The home was established by divine decree. This in and of itself would explain why the home is under attack today. The ungodly rebel against God and His Word which puts a large bull's-eye on the home and family unit. The home is under Satanic attack as evidenced by the fact that we have seen more changes in the structure of the home in our generation than all the rest of history combined. The traditional family unit has been and is being redefined by our culture. For the first time ever marriages are outnumbered by divorces. For the first time ever there are more couples cohabiting (living together/shacking up) than are legally married. For the first time in its history we have a political system that supports and advocates same-sex marriage and recent supreme court cases have overturned everything concerning marriage as we know it. (I'm waiting for a polygamist case to make its way to the Supreme Court). If a marriage cannot be defined as between a man and a woman then how about one man and six women etc. etc. ad- nausem! And what about all the laws about marriage between close family members and the list goes on and on. God designed the family and when it is established according to the divine blueprint it always works!

b. The Divine Organization of the Home

What does the word "...head..." mean in verse 23? I can tell what it does not mean. It doesn't mean dictatorship. There are two decidedly different perspectives on this subject and both are wrong. First, the world claims that this principle of "headship" allows men to put women "in their place," to behave like Neanderthals (cave men) and they see it as degrading to women. To these folks I would say that your problem is not with men, it is with God. Second, and just as wrong is the notion in the church that men can be authoritarian and dictatorial, and that women should be subservient to men in everything.

Tombstone: "Here lies the body of Jerry Ray, who refused to give up his right of way, he was right dead right as he traveled along, but just as dead as if he was wrong!"

Let me observe that the attitudes of the former have been shaped largely by a reaction to those of the latter! If it doesn't mean dictatorship then what does it mean? It means leadership. You say to me, "isn't that the same thing?" and my answer would be no. God has ordained that the husband is to provide leadership in the home. Now let me tell you something about leadership. Someone has said, "If you think you are a leader, just look behind you, if no one is following then you are not a leader!" Dictatorship demands that we follow while leadership desires that we follow. Believe me my friend, there is a big difference!

Ill. - Gordon Selveridge built huge department stores in England by being a leader, and not a boss. He said, "A boss drives men, a leader coaches them. The boss depends upon authority, the leader good will. The boss inspires fear, the leader enthusiasm. The boss says I, the leader says we. The boss fixes blame for breakdowns, the leader fixes breakdowns. The boss knows how it is done, the leader SHOWS how it is done. The boss says go, the leader says let's go."