Healing Through Grief

HEALING THROUGH GRIEF

By: C. Mason Davis

Today’s Scripture

John 14:1-3; "Don't let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me". Remembering God's promises can help mourners and give them a new perspective during a trial.”

Perhaps some of you have lost someone near and dear to your heart, or perhaps you lost something. Losing anything can cause you to experience grief and sometimes depression. People close to you may eventually tell you to get over your grief and move on with their life. They speak of grief as if it were a bad and damaging emotion. While living depressed isn’t a good thing, living through grief is good, especially as a life lesson. Those who say to stop grieving have either never experienced grief, or in their minds, are just trying to be helpful. Too much of that kind of help isn’t good. The grieving person can start to avoid that person or worse, can fall into depression because of the guilt laid upon them by the person telling them to get over their grief.

Healing from grief for most people won’t ever be completely healed. Over time, it may lessen, but grief for the lost won’t ever be over because there will be reminders, anniversaries, thoughts, and memories that dredge up the wounds caused by grief. This is normal. It’s okay to feel this way because grieving means that you really loved and now you’re really missing what’s lost.

Experiencing healing through grief often emphasizes that God is present with those who are suffering and that grief can be a path to spiritual growth, leading to a deeper understanding of God and hope for eternal life. This is meant to encourage you to embrace grief healthily, find comfort in faith and community, and trust in God's promise of eventual joy, even while acknowledging the pain of loss or disappointment.

When you lose someone dear to you, that passing can leave you shocked, feeling numb, hopeless, scared, and devastated. Many of you may still feel some of these issues long after the loss and often wonder if you’ll ever get relief. I’m sure that most of you can remember the moment you heard the devastating news. I’m sure that many of you are still trying to convince yourselves that is was more like a bad dream or could have been anything other than reality. When the truth finally sets in, your initial reaction is to distract yourself at all times. You throw yourself into your work, family, and other projects just to stay busy so you can keep your mind on anything else. There is a reality to escapism from your grief, your problems, and any kind of issue that you’re trying to forget, but no matter how far you run, your grief will always be waiting on you.

It might be years later and you’re still dealing with the grief, the issues, and the problems that don’t seem to be getting any easier, but keep causing you to become more and more discouraged on a daily basis. No matter how depressed you become over time, it will get easier. But just understand that you won’t ever return to the way you were before, and that’s okay. But there is healing when you are no longer in denial. You won’t be as depressed or feel the need to escape from anything negative that happens as you’ve been at rock bottom in life, or so it seems. It can and will get easier in time. Perhaps you’ll learn that your grief amplifies the obstacles you have faced, are facing, or will face. When life happens and challenges arise, you can almost hear an audible voice of Satan whispering, “Don’t forget that the someone you lost is still dead, too.” That is just how Satan tries to keep you under his thumb once he has your attention.

We serve an empathetic God. He feels our pain, and He grieves alongside us. We see it in John 11:35 which simply says; “Jesus wept.” We don’t serve a God who knows only joy. We serve a God who walked the earth and felt pain just as intensely as we do.

So, is it possible to heal from grief? For some, yes. Healing begins with facing reality and remembering that God is with you. Healing is a journey, so be patient and give yourself peace of mind. God’s presence will provide you with grace and will teach you as He leads you through your suffering.

Dealing with your own grief will teach you how to be a better friend when tragedy strikes the people you love. It’s hard to know what to say. We want to be there for our grieving friends, but we don’t want to say the wrong things. Instead, we need to learn to be more empathetic to show that we too, have walked a mile in their shoes, and to let them know that we are available for them when they need a sympathetic ear. When we try to help we often talk too much rather than listen. We think we know how to heal them. We try too hard to say the magic words that’ll make everything better for them.