Envy - A Perverted Love

Well, with marker in hand I began to draw the shoes. I thought I was doing something wonderful until my mother came out of her classroom, saw what I had drawn and blew a gasket. Now you must remember, I was about 10 years old at the time and in my mind the shoes looked pretty good. I do not know what my mother saw compared to what I saw but her assessment did not match mine. I saw shoes comparable to what my brother would draw. My mother, however, saw Humpty Dumpty with one shoe that looked like what Bozo the clown would wear and one shoe that looked like a high heel shoe that a woman would wear. I wanted to explain to her that she was looking at it all wrong; that she needed to use her “creative eye” and look at it from different angles, but I did not get the chance. She pulled me away from the wall and told me not to even think about touching it again. Now to make matters worse, instead of just leaving the shoes I had drawn on Humpty alone, she made Delrick remove what I had spent so much time drawing and re-draw it. To add more salt to my injury, in my mind, the shoes I had drawn looked better – more creative. The shoes Delrick finally drew looked identical, were comparable in size and looked totally normal – what you could see in any picture. In my mind, there was no creative value in drawing something that looked normal – but my mother was very pleased with my brother and praised him. I got nothing! I didn’t even receive any “participation praise” for trying!!! Once again, although I came so close to proving that I was just as good, that my talents were equal to my brother’s, I learned that not everyone understood creative art. After that my mother never asked me to draw anything for her again, even though she never asked me in the first place, and I never offered.

The point of this story is that I was very envious of my brother’s gift. Not envious enough to hurt him, but envious enough to imagine myself ripping apart something that he had created and was getting praise for. Envy wants what others have and will not be content until it receives it. Envy is more than just coveting something that belongs to someone else. With envy, you actually love what someone else has so much that you actually have ill will towards the person who possesses that which you love. You want to see something bad happen to them so you can get what they possess. Just as love originates in the heart, so does envy. Jesus made the following observation when He was questioned about things entering a man’s body and making him unclean (defiled).

“(20) And He was saying, ‘That which proceeds out of the man, that is what defiles the man. (21) For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed the evil thoughts, fornications, thefts, murders, adulteries, (22) deeds of coveting and wickedness, as well as deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride and foolishness. (23) All these evil things proceed from within and defile the man.’” (Mark 7:20-23)

Jesus says envy is evil. Let that sink in New Light. And not only did He say it is evil, but He says envy originates within our hearts. Since this is the case, envy is not something that happens “to us” but it is something that is “created within us and comes from us”. This means we are in the best position to exercise control and discipline over it to keep from sinning against God and our fellowman. For example, do you recall when Pilate wanted to release Jesus so that he didn’t have to crucify Him and he gave the people a choice between releasing Jesus or Barabbas, a criminal? Matthew 27:18 says “For he knew that because of envy they had handed Him over.” Pilate knew that the chief priests were very envious of Jesus on several levels. First He claimed to be the Son of God and really had proof that He was if they were willing to accept it. Jesus also performed miracles that none of them had ever seen or been able to perform in their lifetime. He also did not put on a show for the people in order to make a name for Himself and He related to the common people, something they did not do. These things caused people to be drawn to Jesus in ways that they had never been drawn to the Jewish religious leaders. The religious leaders were so envious of Him that they made the decision early in His ministry to find a way to kill Him. Even though our envy may not lead us to kill, it is still sin, is very dangerous and does have that potential. Consider the following scripture: