Dealing With Tensions And Conflicts In Churches And Church Organisations – Practical Examination And Suggestions – Part 5 Series

DEALING WITH TENSIONS AND CONFLICTS IN CHURCHES AND CHURCH ORGANISATIONS – PRACTICAL EXAMINATION AND SUGGESTIONS – PART 5

This is the final part in the series.

This next subject is near the end in the collection I had, but for some churches it can be a nightmare. I am going to share some thoughts and ideas on it.

[A]. MAYBE THE WORST PROBLEM OF ALL - CHURCH BUSINESS MEETINGS – KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING BEFORE YOU BEGIN! BE ORGANISED. NOT A FREE FOR ALL

Let us proceed to the biggest problem of all in churches for tension, conflict and the display of all that is not good in the old human nature, and that is the Church Business Meetings. At least that is true in my experience. Those of you who have business meetings, do you recall any nastiness at them? If you have not, then it seems you have a good church group.

I have been to a lot of church and affiliate business meetings, and have chaired some and advised on others. It is a thorny matter and I think the churches that hold these meetings think they are acting on a democratic principle. That is where every one termed “member” or “official member” has the right to express him/herself, along with everyone else. Most of my experiences with this type of meeting has been with Baptist churches thought there have been others as well.

When a quarterly, or whatever it is, meeting is called, there are the odd ones who have been waiting for the time to have their say = to sound off about something. At the meeting that person or those ones, sit like crouched tigers waiting to pounce and they do when along comes “Is there any other general business?”

This has seen some of the nastiest behaviour when some people get hot under the collar and start shouting, making accusations, tearing others down, and I saw one who began swearing in anger. All that is disgraceful behaviour in what is supposed to be a gathering of Christians. Church business meetings are the cause of so many who are jealous and “put out”, angry and in silent seething, and the spirit of envy and divisiveness has split the meeting. I don’t think I want to say any more about that.

The next question is a very important one. Can that be prevented? The answer is a decisive, “Yes.” There are some steps I think can be taken –

1. Ensure that the meetings are always chaired by efficient and experienced men.

2. Be very careful about items on the agenda. If you know they are controversial, try to use another approach or deal with them in another way.

3. Open-ended items don’t always work especially if there is a tendency for contrary views.

4. Following on from Number 3, I think it is a good idea to bring recommendations to the meeting, say, from the Board or elders or committee, however your church is structured. That avoids the nebulous open-ended approach.

5. When the meeting seems to be “heating up” and no resolution seems apparent, the chairman should conclude discussion on that one and refer it over. Let him move that it pass to the oversight group, whatever name you have.

6. Try to come up with a better system for the selection of persons than elections at meetings. I have seen some problems with that as some see themselves rejected by the group and they get bitter. I have seen recriminations. All that leads to a growing tension in a church. I think I mentioned earlier that it is better to decide on people for positions, agreed to by the elders, and then those people mentioned at the meeting, or on Sundays. Explain that is what the elders felt before the Lord. Of course all would be confirmed with the selected persons beforehand.

7. Probably one of the better ways is to bring all business to the meeting as recommendations from the oversight (trusting you have good men on that and not just a popularity selection as I raised much earlier on). “Open for General Business” is always an invitation for a possible confrontation even though it forms the format of most Business Meetings.

I have never forgotten some trouble a church meeting had in the 1970s in a Baptist church before a wage structure was determined by the State/national body. In those day the Pastor was paid the basic wage, now called the minimum wage. One person in General Business really ran with this and was insistent on a much higher remuneration (I think called a stipend in those days). It caused problems in the room partly because this person was quoting from The Good News Bible I think it was, and he said this, “If your minister works well, pay him well.” What he was doing was focussing on this verse – {{1Timothy 5:17 “Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honour, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching,”}} The Good News Bible had it wrong, but with a partially correct understanding.”}}