“how To Experience A Maximum Marriage"

“How To Experience A Maximum Marriage”

May 1. 2011 . Linwood Community Church . AM Service . Pastor Chris Gregas

Text: Malachi 2:10-16

I have had the privilege of counseling hundreds of couples in my lifetime. Janet and I have ourselves had the privilege of receiving marriage counseling at different times in our marriage journey. My mother and father were married for almost 50 years, though I do not believe that the majority of those years were what you could call a “God-honoring” marriage. They survived, they loved each other in there own way, but there marriage did not “thrive.” I have learned over the years, that LENGTH of marriage has little to do with STRENGTH of marriage. Another words, is your marriage, is my marriage SOURING or SOARING? Is it getting BETTER or is it getting more BITTER? Is it more of a “business arrangement” or is it a marriage that Christ is in the middle of.

What I am going to share this morning are PRINCIPLES that we agree on as a couple. Principles that we know are TRUE and we know WORK. Jan and I are very open to helping others in their marriage relationship. Not because we believe we are the model. Far from it. Not because we believe our relationship is fail proof or better than every other marriage. That would be the height of PRIDE! We have survived the bruises and scars of marriage and by the grace of God we have come out the other side better and humble.

We are only interested in GIVING OUT what God in His grace has DEPOSITED into us. We owe God that much. He has been very gracious and merciful to us in our marriage. Freely we have received. We must freely give.

I would like to share with you some truths that we are mindful of regularly. These truths must be known and lived out if WE are going to have a “great marriage” as opposed to just a business arrangement that sadly, so many Christian couples have.

SPECIAL NOTE: Now for those who are not married YET here, please don’t tune me out this morning. These principles are for you as well and you never know when you are going to need them!!!

Principles that allow every married couple to have a MAXIMUM MARRIAGE:

Principle #1: Marriage is God’s idea and it only works when we follow His program. Therefore – BE OBEDIENT!

Marriage is God’s idea. Let’s start there. I think our society has been duped into believing that marriage is a “man-made” idea and the thought especially in the Western world is – WE NEED TO GET RID OF IT. Or it needs to be open to the SAME SEX or it JUST ISN’T NEEDED because LIVING TOGETHER is the same thing and it is cheaper!

LISTEN: God invented marriage and He presided & officiated over the first one in history.

As the INVENTOR of marriage ……..

-He understands how it works therefore we must KNOW & DO what His word says in regard to marriage.

(i.e. Heb. 13:4 says, 4 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.)

Q. Do you think there are consequences to committing adultery on your spouse? Does God know what He is saying when it comes to “preserving” marriage? That is a no brainer really.

As the INVENTOR of marriage ……

-We must understand that marriage does not work without following God’s program.

Show me a Christian couple or a couple period that either ignores God in their marriage or doesn’t give Him first place in their marriage – and I will show you a business arrangement and a marriage that is headed for disaster and at the very least – real unhappiness!

Principle #2: Marriage is never the problem, the problem lies with the two people that share marriage – BE HUMBLE!

Listen: Marriage is God’s idea and all of God’s ideas are perfect and ideal!

To say that marriage doesn’t work or it is a silly idea or its better days have come and gone is to miss the point ENTIRELY! You see the idea of two people coming together for life in a marriage partnership is not only a God-like idea but it is perfectly what we need!

The PROBLEM: The two people in it! We are the fly in the ointment! We are the one’s who mess it up. God cannot be BLAMED for our sinful make-up and selfish living – CAN HE?

Think about this!!!! Two people from different backrounds, with different likes and dislikes, with different world views, with different family and marriage expectations, with sinful hearts, with prideful hearts, with hurts and abuses that often are never dealt with, who are on different levels spiritually – IS IT ANY WONDER THAT ANY MARRIAGE LASTS?